this post was submitted on 21 Feb 2025
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

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[–] [email protected] 164 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Everyone knows Disney's movies are 100% accurate depictions of reality

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Ik right, Mickey Mouse exists irl

[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 month ago

I'v seen him DJ

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Treasure Planet was a documentary.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

Oh that's why Musk wants to go to space.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago

You may be sarcastic but too many ppl actually believe this.

[–] [email protected] 77 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

1 - they are dog people. They probably married just because the dogs liked each others.

2 - it's a cartoon.

3 - it's just a fucking depiction of two people randomly meeting, it's implied that they hit it off stellarly and, yes, people do MAD CRAZY things such as... marrying a person they are in love with.

4 - bestiality.

[–] [email protected] 37 points 1 month ago (1 children)

One of these is not like the other. My bet is number 2.

[–] ZombiFrancis 5 points 1 month ago

I dunno, 3 makes wild accusations about implied meanings. Seems suspect.

[–] Ummdustry 8 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

/\ /\
(4._.4)

[–] [email protected] 73 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Don't forget the rampant domestic abuse that frequently came from the person you signd a life long contract with. Easy my ass

[–] Jax 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Why would any of that context matter to a 4channer?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Yaknow, when your right, your right

[–] [email protected] 61 points 1 month ago

They did not. And even then, so darn many boomers think it's normal to dispise your partner you'd almost think they're a bunch of losers

[–] [email protected] 56 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

Conan O'Brian meeting his wife:

https://people.com/tv/who-is-conan-obrien-liza-powel-obrien-wife/

"Then I left the room after this 20-minute conversation with only her. " After joking about having kids together during this initial conversation, the two exchanged information and began dating. In January 2002, the couple tied the knot.

So it happens, it just helps if you're tall and ginger.

[–] [email protected] 43 points 1 month ago (6 children)

Step 1) don't be ugly

Step 2) see step 1

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Exception to Rule 1: Be Conan Fucking O'Brian

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[–] RowRowRowYourBot 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Be affable

Be interesting

Be presentable

No one dreams about the guy they have to apologize for after you met them

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago (4 children)

I mean, Conan O'Brien isn't exactly beautiful

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

I mean, I would have his babies, and I'm a straight man!

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

"Don't be ugly" is definitely helpful physically, but vital intelectually and emotionally.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

For men:

  1. Be rich
  2. Don't be poor
[–] RowRowRowYourBot 7 points 1 month ago (2 children)

No, you just have to be interesting to talk to, genial, and not look like complete shit.

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[–] [email protected] 52 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Premarital sex being taboo sped things up

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

And yet they had more premarital sex than millenials/gen z

Edit: can't find the source where I had heard that. Maybe not true. This study shows the rates are lower than for millennials, but close. https://www.bgsu.edu/ncfmr/resources/data/family-profiles/hemez-nonmarital-sex-by-age-25-boomers-millennials-fp-17-11.html

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I was just making a joke, but don't doubt that you're right. It's a tough thing to measure as people aren't always honest. Like if somebody took a poll in 1986 asking folks if they smoked weed, paranoia might cause smokers to say no

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

Oh, totally. Just like to bring up that our grandparents/great grandparents were getting nasty even before widespread use of birth control, etc. Young folks today are having a lot less sex, or so I've heard, largely due to difficulties finding partners, stress, etc.

[–] [email protected] 52 points 1 month ago

Lol, poor Anon thinks a Silent Generation meetcute in a cartoon is Boomers IRL.

Awwww....

[–] [email protected] 48 points 1 month ago

My grandparents got married because my grandfather left his car keys in his coat on the rack by the door of a diner and someone grabbed his coat.

Apparently while they waited in the diner for a friend to pick them up he asked my grandmother if they should get married and she said
"Sure."
3rd date. It was just something to do back then.

[–] [email protected] 46 points 1 month ago (1 children)

101 Dalmatians came out in 1961, these characters would be a part of the Silent Gen, or the Greatest Gen.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Fuck, is it really that old? Crazy

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

Still looks amazing

[–] sugar_in_your_tea 35 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Not a boomer, but here's how it worked for me:

  1. Meet at party, hit it off, and exchange numbers
  2. Text for a few days
  3. Date for a couple months
  4. Due to cruelties of hard to change plans, date long distance for a year
  5. Get married

Still together after 10+ years. We're not all that different from the cartoon, and if we didn't have the forced separation, we probably would've gotten married sooner.

[–] lka1988 9 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

That's basically how my wife and I met. Except we were never exclusive because she was a really good friend and I didn't wanna fuck that up. We ended up going our separate ways when she went off to college... We reconnected platonically years later, and then realized we were both getting divorced at the same time. One thing led to another, and we've been married for almost 2 years now.

We joke that if we had been exclusive, we would have a 20 year old already.

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[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago (1 children)

My former boss had a whole church community arrange a meeting between him and a woman, just so his parents could tell her parents what he thought of her. The two would eventually marry. It really was that easy back then. And yes they’re still happily married for reasons beyond my understanding.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago (8 children)

I'm going to assume if you arrange 1000 marriages a few are definitely bound to work out. For the rest though...

[–] RowRowRowYourBot 14 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Arranged marriages have better results than love based ones in many cultures. It turns out having all your family who have had kids and been married have a clearer understanding of the couples compatibility than those in love.

Love will make you overlook the thing that your auntie would zero in on as a long term problem.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I can see the logic. The realities of day to day life and managing a household together are a considerably larger presence than most people realize until they're shoulder deep into adult life.

[–] RowRowRowYourBot 6 points 1 month ago

My cousin was miserable after his first year in marriage. Our grandmother, who was lovely but not perceptive, told him not to marry her after meeting her the first time because she was dismissive of his perspective. My cousin didn’t think this was an issue until the honeymoon period wore off and then realized his new wife never thought he knew anything.

They lasted 6 years.

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

What about the ones that work out?

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago

Why would you ever want to meet someone and get married so quickly? Are you more interested in the appearance of what you consider to be a successful life, rather than having a life partner?

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago

the dog kinda roped 'em in to it.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

This is like one step above the brainlets trying to retvrn to 50s advertising campaigns as though they were real life.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

Anon needs to start crashing into women at the park

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Didn't even have smartphones either.

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