this post was submitted on 09 Nov 2024
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Cyberdyne Systems, Wayland-Yutani Corporation, Tyrell Corporation, or Arasaka Corporation? Something else?

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[–] [email protected] 75 points 2 months ago (4 children)

Nah nothing that cool. A megacorp that has so much influence that it doesn't need a military of its own. It knows everything it needs to about everyone, can sway public opinion as it wishes, and will continue to enmesh itself into every aspect of private and public life. It produces no products. We are the products, and we are the consumers.

And it's already here: Google, Meta, whatever Elon Musk is doing idk.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 2 months ago

So, Evil Corp, then

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago

Sometimes the companies they subcontract, named something boring and innocuous like Isolace Data Systems or Wimblo Digital or some shit, fucks up spectacularly.

Like they'll just have 400gb Excel spreadsheet called all_meta_usernames_and_passwords.xlsx stored in the company's shared intranet and then some dude guesses the WiFi password was WimbloDigital2024 and leaks it to whoever.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Pizza Hut's biggest mistake was selling off their war-fleet.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

Which was a shame as Taco bell won the fast food wars.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

Yeah I don't see how anyone can not see it's Google... Who else is even close to having all our data? All the web searches, mobile android play backend, maps, Google streetcar, etc etc... They know everything.

[–] [email protected] 53 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

The world got its first dystopian megacorp several hundred years ago and it was called the East India Company

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago
[–] neidu3 41 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Pssst, Amazon already exists...

If we have to go by a fictional one, I think OCP.

[–] stringere 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

You down with OCP (Yeah you know me)

Who's down with OCP (Every last homie)

You down with OCP (Yeah you know me)

Who's down with OCP (All the homies)

[–] neidu3 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

I'm not sure if that's OC or a reference I'm not cultured enough to understand, but I can absolutely imagine a modern OCP advertising jingle like that, showing how down with everyone OCP is and totally not evil in any shape or form. The TV ad of course shows people dancing to it like it's some coke ad.

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 2 months ago

Fucking Nestle

[–] [email protected] 21 points 2 months ago

RobCo

Military contractor and aerospace giant obsessed with autonomous AI.

Replace Robert House with El*n and it's halfway there already.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago

That's Amazon.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Tyrell, because Paypalpatine wants his sex robots, ands that means replicants.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Paypalpatine

chefs kiss

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

But the other Paypalpatine is building the precrime Minority Report machine. We're really getting the worst of all these fucking shitheads combined.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Taco Bell

SpoilerDemolition Man

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 months ago
[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] jubilationtcornpone 4 points 2 months ago

"Veridian Dynamics. People Lie. Companies protect their interests. It's different."

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago
[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago

We need to revive the neon sign industry at least

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Welcome to Costco. I love you

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I could really go for a Starbucks right now.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago

We don't have time for a hand job.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago

Ares macrotechnology. Guns, cars, space, a private military/police force, and 'Mom and Apple pie.'

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It's all of them, all at once. Yesterday.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

It's called the United States of America

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago

I'm holding out for Aperture Science, if for no other reason than that their AI has a dry, dark sense of humor.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago
[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Umbrella Corp.

Or possibly Conglomo (from Rocko's Modern Life). They own everything and are run by two dip shits.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

Weyland-Yutani canonically merged with Wal-Mart, so Wal-Mart.

[–] fsxylo 5 points 2 months ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago

We get Qualityland's "The Shop" if we like it or not.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

Mao-Kwikowski Mercantile, with their subsidiary Protogen.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

Virtucon (Dr Evil's org in Austin Powers)

[–] TheEEEdiot 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

Aint the Standard Oil is the OG that "pioneered" many of the bread and butter tactics of acquiring and abusing monopoly market power?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

Brondo, the thirst mutilator.

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