this post was submitted on 06 Sep 2024
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Science Memes

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[โ€“] [email protected] 261 points 2 months ago (11 children)

Evidently it really was probably a cucumber? http://artisticlicenseorwhyitrustnoone.blogspot.com/2022/11/bullshit-memes-8-ancient-egyptian.html?m=1

tl;dr - was found with other model food, probably meant to sustain someone in the afterlife

[โ€“] [email protected] 118 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Let me guess. A model carrot, squash was there also. And a drawing of a farmer with his shirt off.

[โ€“] [email protected] 50 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[โ€“] [email protected] 39 points 2 months ago (3 children)

Butt plugs and corn ribbed for her pleasure

[โ€“] [email protected] 22 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

Yeah picture didnt help their cause, thats a whole bunch of ancient sex toys.

[โ€“] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

How thoughtful of them to ensure that the deceased would have something to put up their butt in the underworld.

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[โ€“] [email protected] 30 points 2 months ago
[โ€“] [email protected] 35 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Sustain someone with the ability to have a little sexy time in the afterlife? I like this.

[โ€“] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago

No it was a final insult, telling them to go fk themselves /s

[โ€“] [email protected] 26 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Wakes up in the afterlife only to bite into fake food, that's gotta suck.

[โ€“] [email protected] 14 points 2 months ago (2 children)

You ever tried eating a mouldy cucumber?

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[โ€“] [email protected] 70 points 2 months ago (1 children)

No you see they know it's a cucumber because ancient Egyptian dildos had a compartment for bees so that users could experience a vibration effect.

[โ€“] [email protected] 45 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

This is the economy model. Made for the common folk, not Cleopatra. (That is just an urban legend btw.)

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[โ€“] [email protected] 68 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It was probably used for religious purposes of some sort

[โ€“] [email protected] 28 points 2 months ago (1 children)

indeed. coming closer to believed gods is important to some in any society. its just a clear in and out conclusion.

[โ€“] [email protected] 31 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Usage was frequently accompanied by callings to a deity from a trance like state.

[โ€“] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago

A very popular ritual that has survived for millennia

[โ€“] [email protected] 37 points 2 months ago

Likely used for ceremonial purposes.

[โ€“] ArbitraryValue 36 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

The Egyptians weren't always shy, but there do appear to be traces of green paint.

[โ€“] [email protected] 33 points 2 months ago

Perhaps it was located next to a pair of model tomatoes

[โ€“] [email protected] 25 points 2 months ago (5 children)

Where are the โ€˜?โ€™ marks. Is this how people write now.

[โ€“] [email protected] 32 points 2 months ago

Imagine yourself being confused and baffled by something, and asking "Really?". The intonation is rising, as is usual in questions. Imagine yourself hearing someone say something you are completely confident is absurdly false or a lie, and you want to suggest to the person that they're wrong and you know the truth, by sarcastically asking "Really?". The intonation is falling, closer to ordinary statements of fact.

OOP is using the full stop at the end of his "questons" to suggest the second, sarcastic intonation.

[โ€“] [email protected] 17 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It's how people spoke in May of 2021. It was a different time.

[โ€“] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

๏ฟฝ ๏ฟฝ ๏ฟฝ ๏ฟฝ ๏ฟฝ ๏ฟฝ ๏ฟฝ ๏ฟฝ

[โ€“] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Oh that's cool, let me try.
Hunter2

[โ€“] BigFatNips 6 points 2 months ago (2 children)

All I can see is Hunter2 so you're probably fine

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[โ€“] the_crotch 5 points 2 months ago (2 children)

It's a unicode emoji of a cucumber that your device apparently doesn't support

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[โ€“] [email protected] 22 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Do a scientific test were you put it in front of a cat and see what happens

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[โ€“] [email protected] 21 points 2 months ago (2 children)

The Egyptlogists might have some additional context and knowledge that some rando on Twitter might now.

[โ€“] [email protected] 16 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (8 children)

sure, but experts have been making bad assumptions before.

Like archaeologists up until relatively recently have been calling viking graves with swords in male, without really looking at the actual skeleton.

that said, yeah, I still definitely trust the experts more

[โ€“] BigDanishGuy 17 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

My wife's been reading this book that references this. As well so many other cases of men assuming genders or disregarding women in science, among other things. It's crazy. "hmm that skeleton has wide hips, but it is also buried with a sword, so it's a man". Female physiology traits in a man is way more plausible, than a woman being buried with a sword ... wtf?!?

Anyway, the book is next on my reading list https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Invisible_Women:_Exposing_Data_Bias_in_a_World_Designed_for_Men

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[โ€“] SapphironZA 8 points 2 months ago

But did cucumbers look like that 4000 years ago?

[โ€“] [email protected] 14 points 2 months ago
[โ€“] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago

Remember that the idiots in the 19th & 20th centuries uncovering all kinds of Egyptian stuff purposefully damaged inscriptions and art because they prominently showed gasp penises!

[โ€“] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago

I'm the model of a cucumber Egyptian

[โ€“] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

As we well know all women and men in history that lived together with someone of the same gender were just friends. There are many historical records in which esteemed historians depicted the factual truth of deep friendships. Luckily for the rest of us, those noble seers always knew all context required and bore no prejudices towards anything whatsoever. That is a model cucumber. It even tastes like one.

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