this post was submitted on 14 Oct 2023
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[–] Sabata11792@kbin.social 76 points 2 years ago

I say "god damn you" to unwork the broken blessing system.

[–] gibmiser@lemmy.world 68 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

Instead try this: Say "What?" And stare at them. Wait for them to explain. Act as though you do not know what a sneeze is. Allow them to explain the process of a sneeze. Tell them you have never experienced that in your life. Wait for them to get exasperated then in a dismissive way mention that you aren't sure you believe them, and change the subject.

Congratulations, you have won this interaction.

[–] starman2112 5 points 2 years ago

The ol' smooth shark maneuver

[–] CarlsIII@kbin.social 38 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I like to say “acknowledged!” like Picard

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 20 points 2 years ago (1 children)

"I'm going to sneeze."

"Make it so!"

[–] CertifiedBlackGuy@lemmy.world 11 points 2 years ago (1 children)

"You may fire when ready."

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 7 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] MartinXYZ 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)

His name is spelled with one "l"; "Wil"

(He'll probably block me for that, if he's on Lemmy)

[–] danc4498@lemmy.world 34 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I always say “shut up” in the most annoyed way possible.

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[–] doingthestuff@lemmy.world 29 points 2 years ago (4 children)

I don't see anything wrong with gesundheit. It means health. And really I feel like the German expression is just saying - be healthy dammit, and stop sneezing!

[–] onion@feddit.de 5 points 2 years ago

You can also say "Schönheit – gesund biste ja": "Beauty – you're already healthy after all"

[–] JayObey711@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago

It used to be something to say to yourself. A little "fuck I hope I'm not next" prayer.

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[–] BeefPiano@lemmy.world 23 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] Zorg@lemmings.world 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] Diplomjodler@feddit.de 4 points 2 years ago
[–] PlasterAnalyst@kbin.social 22 points 2 years ago (2 children)

People who intentionally yell when they sneeze can fuck off.

[–] VoilaChihuahua@lemmy.world 12 points 2 years ago

It feels very good, like physically itches the inside back of my throat (amazing if you're having an allergic response to something), while being deeply psychologically satisfying to yell from your abdomen. I try to only do it at home, but there's a reason some people scream-sneeze.

[–] Repelle@lemmy.world 7 points 2 years ago

I vocalize pretty loudly when I sneeze and it’s entirely involuntary. I hate that I do it and I’ve tried to force myself to stop and it doesn’t work.

[–] ivanafterall@kbin.social 20 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

"Fucking grow up."

[–] MrJameGumb@lemmy.world 13 points 2 years ago (2 children)

This was covered extensively on an episode of Seinfeld

[–] PM_ME_FEET_PICS 4 points 2 years ago

You're soooooo good looking.

[–] PipedLinkBot@feddit.rocks 3 points 2 years ago

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Seinfeld

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[–] TalesFromTheKitchen@lemmy.ml 13 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] PipedLinkBot@feddit.rocks 2 points 2 years ago

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Nice Ron!

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[–] thejml@lemm.ee 11 points 2 years ago

“I’m sorry, I didn’t quite catch that.” - in a Siri voice “Nah, I’m good, thanks though.” “Dude! You scared the crap outta me!”

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 11 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

sneeze once "Bless you."

Sneeze twice "Gesundheit."

Sneeze three times "Ok now you're just fishing for attention."

[–] taaz@biglemmowski.win 10 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)
[–] PipedLinkBot@feddit.rocks 2 points 2 years ago

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Ashley Johnson's reactions to Sam Riegel sneezes

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[–] 018118055@sopuli.xyz 10 points 2 years ago

"Satan curse you"

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 9 points 2 years ago

"I hate when you do that"

That's my favorite

[–] Funkymatt@lemmy.world 9 points 2 years ago

I always 'shhhh' like a librarian would

[–] DauntingFlamingo@lemmy.ml 8 points 2 years ago
[–] zib@kbin.social 7 points 2 years ago

I usually go with "None of that"

[–] garbagebagel@lemmy.world 7 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I like to say GOD BLESS YOU in the most dramatic exaggerated way possible immediately after I sneeze so I beat everyone to the punch. You can't bless me bitches.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 4 points 2 years ago

"Don't you dare ask God to help me," Crawford reportedly snapped at the nurses praying at her bedside, before moments later the Academy Award winner took her final breath.

https://www.express.co.uk/entertainment/films/1749878/joan-crawford-final-words-spt

[–] BlastboomStrice@mander.xyz 7 points 2 years ago (1 children)

In Greece we say "Γείτσες", which is a dimunitive for "Υγεία" (=Health), so essentially its like wishing the other person to be healthy.

[–] tweeks@feddit.nl 5 points 2 years ago

We say the same in the Netherlands, and sometimes we also say the equivalent for "cheers", not sure why though.

[–] rbos@lemmy.ca 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Sneezing isn't normal! I never sneeze.

[–] Denvil@lemmy.one 8 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I sneeze multiple times daily whenever I go outside because of ACHOO Syndrome (yes that is a real name lol)

[–] rbos@lemmy.ca 6 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (2 children)

You poor dear! You should see a doctor. IT IS NOT NORMAL TO SNEEZE!

reference

[–] MonkCanatella 2 points 2 years ago

That was hilarious. Gonna have to check out their podcast.

[–] PipedLinkBot@feddit.rocks 2 points 2 years ago

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reference

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[–] germanatlas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 2 years ago

"Well done" and "clean that up" are my favourites

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 4 points 2 years ago

"I disagree"

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 4 points 2 years ago

I always tell my partner to cut it out when they sneeze.

[–] m3t00@lemmy.world 4 points 2 years ago

get any on you?

[–] potpotato@artemis.camp 3 points 2 years ago
[–] ooterness@lemmy.world 3 points 2 years ago

I prefer the simple "Curse you."

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