this post was submitted on 16 Aug 2023
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[–] [email protected] 191 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

For those that want the source and confirmation:

spoilerIt originated from a satire website: World News Daily Report

spoilerhttps://leadstories.com/hoax-alert/2018/11/fake-news-fbi-raid-at-nsa-employees-home-reveals-over-16000000-dick-pics.html

[–] [email protected] 61 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Thank you haha I was gonna say there's no way it works like that

[–] [email protected] 45 points 1 year ago (6 children)

Article by “Hasan”

Her first name is “Hillary”

Her last name is “Wang”

Obvious parody.

The NSA does have all the pictures from your phone and probably your PC as well, though. And you’d be naive to think they can’t search by object, because I can do that shit on Amazon Photos. They don’t have a “dick” filter but how hard (giggity) would it be to make one? Just buy Chatroulette’s ML model for a start.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 79 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Leave her alone. She was just training her ML model SchlongGPT.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago

Hot dog

Not hot dog

[–] pomodoro_longbreak 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yo people would pay good money for that

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

Based on my research, AI generated porn certainly needs more, um, input...

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[–] [email protected] 51 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (6 children)

How did this take place? Her security clearance let's her download pics from computers and mobile phones just like that?

So they are admitting there are back doors in phones and operating systems?

Doesn't seem likely they would admit that much.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 1 year ago

Did we forget all the sweet NSA tools that quickly? Poor Snowden

[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I mean, it's been a well known fact that the NSA has been intercepting and logging all domestic internet/mobile traffic since Snowden. I bet there are over 16m dick pics sent in the US on a daily basis.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I know but I think the general public doesn't know or understand this. It's still not exactly admitted as a general thing how this works. Apple and other companies usually talk about how they are resisting to give out access etc.

But yeah, nsa can probably access all windows and Mac systems. I don't think Linux though. Not counting Intel Management Engine in the cpu.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (2 children)

A lot of that info was known over a year before that even. Wired did a cover story that apparently got no attention from anyone but me... https://www.wired.com/2012/03/ff-nsadatacenter/

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago

Oh my sweet summer child

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago

It's a joke

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[–] newIdentity 34 points 1 year ago (5 children)

She was just doin' NSA shit: training a AI so that every person can be identified with just a dick pic

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

Yea, the real problem was making a Geoguessr like app where you have to name someone by their dick pic. All she had to do was keep the sausages in-house.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

don’t give sam altman any ideas

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[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 year ago (2 children)

If she's that into dick pics, let us know where they're sending her and we can try and double that 16M. All printed and mailed to her. Imagine the state of the mail service at the prison when they have to sift through a thousand sacks of Polaroids every day.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago

*Polaroids of sacks...

FTFY

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 year ago (1 children)

fake article from 2018 btw

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 year ago (5 children)

so uh article, no outrage that this can even be done by the NSA?

[–] [email protected] 45 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Well, no because the story is so obviously fake that no one but the most credulous of suckers could fall for it.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

The only thing that makes this obviously fake is that it claims she downloaded them from people's phones, rather than from some centralized NSA data store... And the idea an NSA employee would be held accountable publicly and cause bad PR.

[–] pomodoro_longbreak 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Snowden let everyone know they could do this in his leaks

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

And this, boys and girls, is a good enough reason to not digitize your willy or cooter, no matter how much you think it'll get you laid.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

What if getting my dick doxxed is my kink?

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Lmao this has been legal since the Bush administration.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (5 children)

I mean yea but this literally proves what people have been saying, that it would be super easy to abuse

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 year ago (1 children)

She works at the NSA. She's been collecting evidence about how many dick pics women receive all the time.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

she just took home her work for the day

[–] newIdentity 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)

In Germany that might be illegal

But not because she takes work material home but because of employee rights

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[–] icepuncher69 20 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Holy shit, im reading this while listening to Bach cello suite 1 and it becomes surreal as fuck.

Edit: Turns out this is fake news. But still funny as fuck.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago

wait woah there - fake news, on MY internet??? it's more likely than you think.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 year ago (6 children)

That's a high number, Wang.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

And strangely that is NOT numberwang!

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Now that's a proper dataset for automated DM spam filtering!

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

theft of government property and classified materials

wait... what

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Ate the onion, which sucks because there are reported cases of employees spying/stalking exes and crushes

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago

Funny how we can all go, "Yes, this is a possible thing".

NSA and gov't have too much data on us withouy warrants and using 3rd party companies.

Great post OP!

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago

Hope you liked it.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago

We OnLy CoLlEcT MeTaDaTa, TrUsT Us.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

It's all a mistake. Someone was told to forward all dick pics to [email protected]. So, they did!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

And those are just the unsolicited ones she received on Tinder.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Here is an alternative Piped link(s): https://piped.video/dvn-hpZdElo

Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

I'm open-source, check me out at GitHub.

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