this post was submitted on 23 Oct 2024
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Not The Onion

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cross-posted from: https://real.lemmy.fan/post/7604429

Marketing majors stay fed and housed for another year.

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[–] [email protected] 86 points 1 month ago (4 children)

They're temporarily renaming them "Chilean Sea Bass Crackers".

[–] [email protected] 46 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I thought you were joking. How is this not the Onion?

[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (3 children)

It's nottheonion 🙃

Edit: also it's marketing! It works. It got us talking about a snack product that no one ever talks about. We're doing it right now.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (2 children)

i was just talking about goldfish two days ago

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[–] fsxylo 5 points 1 month ago

Unfortunately thinking about them dredges up memories of the taste of cardboard. So I will not be buying them.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

For one week. And they can only be bought online.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Well, it's clear they've spared no expense.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 71 points 1 month ago (2 children)

"Chilean Sea Bass? Ok, The Onion is losing their touch. Yes, it's absurd, but it's unrealistic. This wouldn't happen in real life."

Not the onion

........wait, what?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (2 children)

It’s the same as when IHOP renamed themselves the International House of Burgers to promote their stupid burger menu then immediately changed back.

I’d love to know how much stunts like this actually convince anyone to consciously or unconsciously purchase more of whatever the marketing team is being paid to promote (I’m guessing nowhere near enough to cover their salaries and the stunt itself).

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[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (5 children)

Most regulatory agencies classify Chilean sea bass as “overfished,”...

https://www.allthingsnature.org/is-chilean-sea-bass-endangered.htm

They changed the name to something which is morally not cool to eat.

Did they put an an "AI" in charge of marketing?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

It's intentionally stupid, which is why it's not a permanent change.

They just want people to talk about it, send pictures of it to their friends, etc, and be an avenue for reminding people that goldfish crackers exist.

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[–] AlecSadler 24 points 1 month ago

As a millennial, I'm going to just not buy goldfish crackers for awhile because this is dumb.

But also I haven't been buying them because I'm on a diet and I could eat an entire gallon container in one sitting if left to my own devices.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago

How many millions did they pay to some yuppie marketing firm to come up with this jack-assery.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago (2 children)

just a marketing stunt. but watch, when 'goldfish' come back into the stores afterwords.. they're in smaller packages.

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

Who here actually thinks "goldfish? That's for kids."

[–] n3m37h 11 points 1 month ago (2 children)

The duck is wrong with goldfish?? Someone shoot the marketing manager for this idea

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[–] csm10495 11 points 1 month ago (3 children)

How does this appeal to people? I like goldfish the same. Though Whales are cheaper and taste okie.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Yay capitalism. If you're fading into irrelevance to the point that you print less bags in order to drum up a false sense of scarcity then your product sucks and you should feel bad. Thirst trap gimmicky

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

How do these dumbass decisions keep getting made? That is the most recognizable fish cracker out there. Are they looking to Musk for ideas? Fire your marketing team, they're blowing your budget on cocaine.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It’s just a marketing joke like iHop did a few years ago

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

Aw man, no Patagonian Toothfish crackers. Again!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

We buy a lot of goldfish in this house. More than most people reading this, I can just about guarantee it.

Please allow me to remind everyone that even Goldfish has gone the shrinkflation route. Maybe if their sales are dipping it's because of their anti-consumer practices.

Not only did the price we paid go up in recent years, but also they changed the size of the large cartons from 30 oz to 27.3 oz.

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

This is the type of announcement you'd expect to hear on April 1st. 🤔

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

announcement

*Advert

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Adults already have cheez-its though

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Do they still taste like sad, slightly burnt air?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

No, now they taste that sad slightly burnt air with a tablespoon of salt.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

This is fish the they chose? Image

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

If I had to choose between adult and child vibes I’d say this fish leans adult

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

This fish fucks!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Are they at least ill-tempered?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Chilean Mutant Sea Bass Crackers

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

They could at least strap a frickin laser beam on their head

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Elon Musk didn't buy the company did he? This is the dumbest business decision since he changed Twitter's name to X.

Or did someone just post their April fool's joke way too late?

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

A sea bass? No, wait - it's at least a C+!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Throws 400 bells at you.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Im glad their marketing department still does drugs. Makes life less boring.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I had to check to make sure that this was not an old April Fools Day joke article.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Slightly off topic, but my favorite April Fools will always be Google changing its name to Topeka and the city of Topeka, Kansas changing its name to Google.

Mostly because I was a teenager and totally bought it.

As far as I know, it's hot in Topeka

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The onion?

No.

April fools article?

No.

Did Elon Musk buy the company?

No.

Then I don't understand. Make it make sense!

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

If I saw the new and old bags next to each other, I probably wouldn't even notice the difference before reading this headline lol. It's basically the same.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (2 children)

been a goldfish fan for years. change the name all you want. dont fuck with the product

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

I'm an elder millennial and I have had absolutely no problem buying goldfish into adulthood. With this change, i'll inevitably be calling them Chilly SeeBas, so idk how much more adult they're going for in my demographic

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

What? It's a funny reference to Jurassic Park!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

Article from 6 months from now:

"Cracker maker Pepperidge Farms filed for a motion to dismiss the class action lawsuit brought against the company by buyers of its 'Chilean Sea Bass Crackers' and the FDA, and the FTC. The crackers contained zero Chilean Sea Bass putting the company's actions clearly in the area of False Advertising and Fraud. When reached for comment the spokesperson for Pepperidge Farms responded 'Its just a prank, bro!'"

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