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submitted 2 months ago by [email protected] to c/funny
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[-] [email protected] 55 points 2 months ago

I want to meet this person, someone with such strong opinions on food is either the most amusing person to talk to, or an insufferable zealot and I really want to know which this person is.

[-] [email protected] 37 points 2 months ago

Someone with that many bumper stickers is always going to be the latter.

[-] [email protected] 27 points 2 months ago

2-3 bumper stickers is ok. Over 12 is an art statement. 3-12 is deranged

[-] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago

Much to think about here. I count 11 stickers if we treat "GLUTEN (subaru logo) MATTERS" as a single sticker, and each heart as one sticker. Add in the GLUTEN plate, and we're at exactly 12. Really on the border between deranged and artistic.

[-] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago

There's a LARD sticker on the thingy above the roof too. We're good.

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[-] [email protected] 53 points 2 months ago

Used to live near someone whose car was covered in "Meat is Murder - Animal Holocaust" stickers.

I bet the pig butts guy is more pleasant.

[-] ricecake 61 points 2 months ago

Eh, anyone who goes out of their way to shit on other people's dietary preferences is unpleasant in my book.

[-] [email protected] 34 points 2 months ago

It's not even like the vast majority people who refrain from gluten just because they don't like it or think it's healthier. It's because they can't tolerate it. This car reads to me like someone ragging on people who have peanut or shellfish allergies.

[-] [email protected] 21 points 2 months ago

To give the dude some credit, a while back it was kinda in-style to hate on gluten or think you're intolerant to it, so maybe this is just a reaction to that?

[-] [email protected] 19 points 2 months ago

No, he's a gluten for puneshment.

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[-] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago

If we were placing bets, I would put money down that his love of pigs is to shit on the Muslim community. I don't have any hard evidence to that effect, but I dunno. I just have a feeling.

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[-] [email protected] 12 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

anyone who is that passionate about shitting on others will be insufferable tbh

[-] [email protected] 53 points 2 months ago

Really makes it for me, that depending on which stickers you look at, they might be:

  • vegan
  • aggressively anti-vegan
  • pig fucker
[-] [email protected] 16 points 2 months ago

This is a truly amazing post. Really inspired writing. Thank you for making me actually lol and forcing my wife to listen to me read it out loud

[-] [email protected] 33 points 2 months ago

the amount of stickers, humorous or not, one has in their car is directly proportional to how crazy they are.

[-] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago

A lot of people don't like bumper stickers. I don't mind bumper stickers. To me a bumper sticker is a shortcut. It's like a little sign that says 'Hey, let's never hang out.'

Demetri Martin

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[-] [email protected] 29 points 2 months ago

Unless artwork or travel tokens, my general rule of thumb is stickers are like emojis. The more someone uses them, the more insane they are.

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[-] [email protected] 26 points 2 months ago

Sponsored by their cardiologist

[-] [email protected] 20 points 2 months ago

The person is actually a cop

[-] [email protected] 18 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Guessing they're estranged from their family of gluten-free health nuts, now they run a pasta/BBQ restaurant and are proud of their new lifestyle. Alternately, a waiter who snapped and couldn't take it anymore.

[-] casual_turtle_stew_enjoyer 8 points 2 months ago

My guess was going to be millennial English teacher who got fed up with the new cafeteria menus and that all the good lunch spots close by are also hopping on the bandwagon. Because it's themed and meticulously laid out, like a perfectionist English teacher might do.

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[-] [email protected] 16 points 2 months ago

It's so sad that your identity has become pushing back against people with food allergies because it was, at one point, trendy. They just be a sad, sad person. I hope they find more meaning out of life

[-] [email protected] 14 points 2 months ago

I want to eat at this guy's house

[-] [email protected] 16 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Too much of this good thing could give you clogged arteries. I love bacon, but I don't want a bacon sandwich made with deep-fried breaded ham slices in place of bread, & slathered in butter.

Shit. Maybe I do, now that I've written it out.

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[-] [email protected] 13 points 2 months ago

I bet they weigh like 500 lbs

[-] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I mean, if you run and exercise regularly, this all accurate and even healthy. Except the lard. Carbs fuel exercise or recovery, pork chops are high in protein and lean, bacon is fine in moderation and also has protien. And gluten is only bad for you if your allergic to it, otherwise you're just eating shittier food for no reason.

But yeah, probably.

[-] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago

You can't exercise your way out of poor diet. Cholesterol is a killer. Carbs, bacon, butter, are fine in moderation, but these stickers don't tell a story of moderation.

[-] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago

you can love food and still know how to moderate

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[-] [email protected] 12 points 2 months ago

gonna lose their fucking mind when they hear about pork belly sliders

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[-] [email protected] 12 points 2 months ago

You're all just intolerant.

[-] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago

I wonder if the love pig thing is actually anti-muslim. And love gluten is to own the libs.

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[-] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago

I don't think they know what gluten is.

[-] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago
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[-] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago
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[-] southsamurai 10 points 2 months ago

Look, homie is just spitting facts and expressing their love for good things. If that's crazy well,

[-] [email protected] 14 points 2 months ago

"The LARD is good" is actually a decent pun.

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[-] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

This is definitely the car of a crazy person, but they've given me a pretext to once again point out that the man who discovered Gluten Sensitivity in 2011 retracted his own findings four years later, and there is probably no such thing as non-celiac gluten sensitivity.

[-] ThanksObama 8 points 2 months ago

Someone is on the way to Flavortown!

[-] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago

Insane. Extremism is never the sign of a sane mind whatever the topic.

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[-] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I find it funny they specifically are about pigs because just the other day, a vegan community posted a chart of the negative environmental impact various farming industries have, and pigs were the lowest impact when it came to animal farming. It was only slightly higher than farming soy.

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[-] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago

I'm just mad cuz I miss gluten.

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[-] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

Where's the I <3 MSG sticker?

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this post was submitted on 26 Apr 2024
518 points (95.8% liked)

Funny

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