this post was submitted on 03 Mar 2024
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[–] [email protected] 58 points 9 months ago (1 children)

This is so stupid. I Love it. Dunno when it was the Last time i laughed that hard

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago (4 children)

Ya but who provides the blood?

[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Everyone has blood, the bigger issue is the vampires. Do you think big engine will be happy with wild sourced vampires or do you think they will start farm raising them? Because capitalism will require an infinite growth of vampires.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Now imagine the fallout when something happens to the vampire power plant, or the vampire farms.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

It means anyone would be able to make a vampire powered engine! Our stock would plummet!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago

You also have to hook Tom Hardy up to the front of the car for this reason

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

They have to make it out of bloodberries

[–] [email protected] 36 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Just put a zombie on treadmill and you got infinite energy.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 9 months ago (1 children)

The fact that zombies seems to be able to walk indefinitly in most movies/series without consuming energy bothers me more than it should.

Do they all evolve to photosynthesize!?

[–] [email protected] 24 points 9 months ago (4 children)

Yeah when people talk about their hypothetical zombie survival plans, mine is just stay at home and eat the food I have. Realistically zombies would starve before I do because they don't know how to use can openers.

It bothers me more that gasoline never goes bad in these things. Things like 28 days later it's fine, but Walking Dead and Last of Us where it's years later... yeah those cars aren't going anywhere anymore. I don't expect these things to be realistic, but it would be more interesting to see people have to adapt to these kinds of problems.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago (1 children)

In TLoU there is still some form of industry under the army

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago

I think the fuel degrading is also partly why they don't drive the whole way. I think in the HBO series they also mention how much fuel it takes to travel now. Not exactly realistic but they apparently thought about it

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

Like in the IF Zombie Exodus

[–] [email protected] 32 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

This reminds me of the Superman comic where they tell him if he truly wants to help all of mankind and solve things like crime and war, he needs to provide almost limitless free energy to the planet. So they put him on a crank and make him generate energy. Mankind prospers until after a long long time Superman is all dried up and has nothing left to give. But before he's empty he's replaced by a new energy source and made obsolete.

https://www.smbc-comics.com/comic/2011-07-13

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago

Damn; that's... sad. And it's just the thing we'd do, too.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 9 months ago

Pretty good but not as efficient as Zombies for plowing, etc as seen in Shaun of the Dead

[–] [email protected] 23 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (2 children)

The only fear I have with this is that I'm not going to be able to bless the holy water quickly enough to make up for the volume lost. Also, there will be certain animal rights concerns that will need addressing before blood can be sourced.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 9 months ago

Just bless the oceans, ezpz.

[–] robotopera 18 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Holy water can be mixed with non holy water and it fully becomes holy water. Simply having a holy water tank that refills whether it becomes 2/3rds full gives you an infinite source of holy water.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Just need to get the homeopath catholics involved. Just one drop of holy water in the ocean will mean that all ocean water is now holy water.

Simple and efficent.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

It's even easier than that. A consecrated spigot produces holy water.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 21 points 9 months ago

Nothing personal. Think of the greater good.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (2 children)

Surelly using the rotational energy of corpses turning in their graves at what's done in their name/by their family/just done somewhere, would be easier.

For one, they're way easier to procure than vampires plus the raw material requirements are lower (in some cases merelly saying certain things is enough to induce rotation).

There are some downsides, however, such as how they have to be in graves for it to actually work (so it's probably a method best used for bulk generation using existing graveyards, plus there are some engineering challenges in connecting the actual corpses in situ to the turbines for energy generation, which are not present in a system made from the ground up for energy generation such as the vampire piston) and, of course, as the corpses age and decompose they become more brittle and it's easier to get catastrophical failure if the turbine offers too much resistance, which means energy production decreases over time or, to avoid turbine replacement later, from the get go a less powerful turbine has to be connected to a pristine condition corpse.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago

Unfortunately, in some cases, this would create negative feedback which would affect efficiency. As an example, Rudolf Diesel is currently rotating in his grave at approximately 2e6 RPM at the current implementation of the diesel engine, his invention. For context at his posthumous displeasure, the when tuned used properly, the diesel engine is the singular most efficient internal combustion engine. That proper use: steady, consistent operation at an invariant rotation running on a waste byproduct of the gasoline refinement process. What it is unquestioningly not designed for: operating devices which turn on and off frequently and require a variation in output power to operate, you know, like a motor vehicle.

So, with all that in mind, attaching a rotational corpse drive to him would generate immense amounts of power initially and push the vehicle and shipping markets towards EVs even faster, but as that happens, his ire will abate and he will begin to slow his rotation until it eventually comes to a peaceful rest, but the power deficit created by that would definitely cause economic and social problems.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago (1 children)

You're also forgetting the fact that we have to do things to make them turn in the first place.

My recovery period between bouts with furry porn is steadily decreasing as I age, for instance and this is a limitation in your system.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago

As I mentioned, merelly saying certain things is enough.

For example, going to a Christian cemitery and shouting "God is dead!" is probably enough to get lots of them going. I wouldn't at all be surprised if with the right setup merely reading pretty much anything by Nietzsche out loud could yield several gigawatts-hour worth of electrical energy production.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 9 months ago

Tell me you play Dwarf Fortress without actually telling me you play Dwarf Fortress.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 9 months ago

The person coming up with this must have been high af

[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 months ago (1 children)

You need some way to drain the exhaust holy water/blood mixture.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 9 months ago (1 children)

You could probably use the diluted blood exhaust to feed baby vampires. You would obviously need to farm more vampires for your power plant and this would reduce overheads.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago (1 children)

The problem is the residual holy water would kill them.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago (1 children)

How do you un-holy some holy water?

[–] guiguinofake 1 points 9 months ago

Copious amounts of porn

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago

Maybe mosquitos would be better for smaller engines running red clean fuel.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

This is the kind of genius invention that gets doodled into your notebook in 5th grade.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

V1 ultrakill

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago

checkmate atheists

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Sounds about as fun as a Cruciform and a Tesla tree. Good times.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

To fix the vampires being out of sync you can just attach them to different drive shafts and just use the right gear ratio.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I'm pretty sure there's still carbon emissions at the dustification stroke

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

Does the vampire recollect the carbon lost from dustification or is that provided by the blood?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago