this post was submitted on 02 Feb 2024
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[โ€“] [email protected] 83 points 10 months ago (4 children)

Nope not getting doxxed today ๐Ÿ‘

[โ€“] lurch 41 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (2 children)

the first 8 digits of your credit card number are your alien name! /s

[โ€“] [email protected] 11 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Aw shit. My alien is 80081355.

[โ€“] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago
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[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

11001001

Damn, was that a trick? It's my real name! Now you know I'm from Bynaus and not from earth

[โ€“] [email protected] 22 points 10 months ago

Haha, that's wild.

Hey, what about your pets name and your mother's maiden name that makes your porn star name. Haha wouldn't that be fun to collate into a single database with everyone else's answers and pair all the info with your account name? Such japes.

And just really quick. Who's your favourite bank, lol so fun and 100% innocent ๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ˜‡

[โ€“] starman2112 17 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Just make up initials to make a funny name. Nobody needs to know that your real name is Jeremy Crawford

[โ€“] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Omg thats such a Shane Grantham from Shamrock Tennesee thing to say

[โ€“] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

I've been on the internet long enough with the same name that I'm sure you could find me if you wanted.

I'll be under the name Monkey Long.

[โ€“] starman2112 29 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Wonkey Dong. Unfortunately fits pretty well

[โ€“] [email protected] 14 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Cooler than Honkey Dong tho

[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago

This is the funniest one in the thread. You win.

[โ€“] [email protected] 24 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I think I might get more popular. Call me Donkey Dong.

[โ€“] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I immediately read that as Donkey Doug.

[โ€“] [email protected] 14 points 10 months ago
[โ€“] [email protected] 19 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Monkey Bong ... It's so me

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago
[โ€“] [email protected] 18 points 10 months ago (1 children)
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[โ€“] [email protected] 14 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

If your names start with vowels, you get whale noises

[โ€“] Scubus 10 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[โ€“] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Oh wow, i totally missed that bit. I really don't read so good while this sleep deprived it seems.

[โ€“] Scubus 4 points 10 months ago

I only noticed because I thought the same thing at first

[โ€“] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago (1 children)

What if the first letter in your first name is a D, and the first letter in your second name is a K?

Does that mean you get to be the Big Man himself?

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

We're all DK

[โ€“] [email protected] 11 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[โ€“] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Damn dude you need a club that's a great name

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[โ€“] [email protected] 11 points 10 months ago

Jonkey Bong, or alternatively Ronkey Bong.

No clue what a "Ronkey Bong" might be, but I feel like Jonkey Bong kinda perfectly describes when you're trying to hit your buddies homemade contraption that is both jank and wonky.

Could also apply to that same buddies old bong that's held together by duct tape and years of resin build up that they refuse to stop using because "I've had it since college, it was my first".

[โ€“] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Monkey Gong kinda slaps tho

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I'm Monkey Song. I'll join your band.

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[โ€“] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago (1 children)

There have got to be about a million people who will just be Donkey Kong.

[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Its the most common non-human ape name, like being called Mohammed Wang is for us.

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[โ€“] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago

Sonkey Cong. I feel like one of those offbrand third party games your tech illiterate aunt buys you for a game system you don't have.

[โ€“] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago

Donkey Cong lol... DC. Not very inventive.

[โ€“] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago

Donkey Dong. Eh, I take it.

[โ€“] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)
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[โ€“] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago

Bonkey Mong ... I dunno about this one.

[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago

Donkey Song.

Nice, quite nice actually. Music to my ears!

[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago

Jonkey Hong. My new name feels odd ..

[โ€“] Freshfrozenplasma 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)
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[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

Sonkey Song

Maybe I'm related to River :-D

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

Donkey Cong?

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

Honkey Tong. Hmm

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago

Donkey Song.

[โ€“] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

Also monkey dong over here

[โ€“] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

Conky Rong, I suppose there are worse combos.

[โ€“] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Gonkey Wong.

I don't know what a Gonkey is, but I do know what a Wong is.

[โ€“] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Gonk has a few possible definitions to choose from:

So, pick your poison I guess?

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