I beat the captain of my high school's chess team and he just yelled at me "I only lost because you don't know anything." I guess he wasn't aware of the Frenchman's Cumsock. π€·π»ββοΈ
this post was submitted on 05 Jan 2024
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I played hockey and was by no means good, but had a friend who was a good goalie, and said it was always tough with the less good players because you couldn't cheat them at all, because even they had no idea where the puck was going.
Doesn't work like that in chess though. If you lose, that's on you.
It took me many years before I got back to where I could enjoy chess and similar games as just fun things to pass time. For a long while, I didn't find games fun when I knew they had been "solved." It didn't matter whether I personally could memorize and execute on that knowledge.
This applied to video games too. If there was a perfect build or an optimal meta or a flawless strategy, the mere existence of it ruined the game for me. It seemed pointless to work on getting better when "perfect" had been achieved.
I think playing a lot of competitive fighting games helped. Realizing that "optimal" didn't always mean flawless execution, and that there's still fun just in seeing what you can train yourself to be capable of doing. It actually helped me a lot in understanding that if a game is fun, then that's what matters, the fun. Strategy and optimizing and "the meta" can be part of the fun, but if they aren't then ignore them, play at your level, and keep finding the fun.
For a long while, I didn't find games fun when I knew they had been "solved."
Chess is not a solved game.
That's why "solved" is in air quotes. I didn't want to go into a long tangent about how while chess isn't technically a solved game, the opening and endgame databases that computers use, along with pretty powerful chess engines, essentially change the nature of the game. There's lots to memorize in the fairly rote early and late game, in the service of reaching an interesting and tactical middle game.
(I had a similar issue with starcraft...)
I think Kasperov has it right that hybrid chess is interesting because it let's the computer do the memorizing and give you a hand with board analysis. But i don't think of chess as particularly sacred so I just found other games that while not as popular or sometimes as deep, offer a more thrilling, unknown challenge.
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Part of the reason why I can't get into Rubik's cubes, and it also lingers in the back of my mind with puzzles like sudoku or minesweeper.
I have to admit that it's hard for me to play a game with an ending when I know I probably won't ever win.
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The beauty of chess is that there's always something new to discover, like the Bongcloud Attack.
The Bongcloud Attack (or Bongcloud Opening) is an irregular chess opening that consists of the moves:
1. e4 e5
- Ke2?
It is considered a joke opening and is associated with internet chess humor.
And I laughed and laughed. Ke2? How delightfully absurd!
Just read this on Wikipedia. It's great!
On 15 March 2021, Magnus Carlsen, playing white, led with the Bongcloud in a game against Nakamura at the Magnus Carlsen Invitational. Nakamura mirrored the opening with 2...Ke7, leading to a position nicknamed the Double Bongcloud.[2] The game was intentionally drawn by threefold repetition after the players immediately repeated moves, the particular sequence they used known as the "Hotbox Variation".
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- Ke2 is absurd!
It would be like if you designed a play in football in which the quarterback is supposed to stand in front of his wide receiver teammates and try to physically hold them back.
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And I laughed and laughed. Ke2? How delightfully absurd!
That's chess humor for you. In 1975 Martin Gardner published an article (on April 1^st ) claiming that chess had been solved by a supercomputer. Where upon if a human opened e4, the computer would spin its fans for several hours, and then resign.
It's a hoot and a half.
Bongcloud works because of how stupid it is. Your opponent doesn't know how to respond.
Idk, a lot of pros talk about how boring chess gets at a certain level. Lots of lines are solved so deep that going to tournaments can mean learning who your opponents are, studying as many of the openings that you know they play as deeply as possible and hoping that you guessed the right openings and that they prepared the wrong ones against you.
Things like the bongcloud work once, when no one at a tournament has seen it before, then it gets solved and playing it is only ever a disadvantage again. It can work in things like rapid chess or whatever when it's used to throw people off guard.
I joined chess club in middle school. I lost my first game in two moves.
I didn't go back to chess club.
Ah, the "Fools mate". Rookie mistake! (/s i suck at chess)
That pretty much describes accurately how I felt, so maybe it should be called that.
There is a two-move checkmate that is called that, he wasn't making that one up. π
hundreds
Just play against people at the same skill level
But they don't let me near the ten-year-olds any more
The last time I played chess it was against a ten year old and I got my ass whooped.
Is there a chess league for babies I could join?
Still too high level for my chess abilities. Is there an amoeba league?
I just wanna put on a pair of boots and stomp around in a room full of helpless babies, is that too much to ask?
You just want to waste food and I'm disappointed in you.
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ΰ² _ΰ²
I feel like with chess it's always the kids that absolutely dominate everyone else.
We just only take note of the weirdos who got an early manual and obsessed over it, not the ones shoving the knights up their nose.
The frenchman's cumsock is a classic move, or at least it should be. Although I find chess interesting (as a concept) I completely suck at playing it, so much so that I could be the frenchman in question. Growing up, whenever I played my older brother he'd always know how to beat me in 4 or 5 moves. I'm much better at solitaire games, though there's a version of solitaire chess I'd like to try.
Yeah I could never understand that gambit. People keep playing this move but I'm just like "How do I be the sock?"
The classic move involves tipping the chessboard out the nearest window and then leaping into your opponent's unguarded lap before he realizes what's going on. Isn't the object of the game the first to be able to "mate" the other?
It's like playing Smash Bros. You only play with people at your skill level. That one friend who likes the game a little too much and watches competitive events? Yeah, you're not going to have fun playing against them. Just play with other people who don't really know what they're doing, and maybe consider throwing items on to even out skill with randomness (someone needs to invent random item drops for chess).
This is why I think Go is actually significantly more approachable than chess. With chess, you really need someone of very similar level; if one of you is a little better, that person will almost always win, and that's often kinda boring for both of you. But Go has a handicapping system built in that makes it way more forgiving of differences in skill, so that you can both play a pretty challenging game. I think it's contributed a lot to the culture around the game being more open and focused on teaching others, too.
That said, there are still a lot of things that high-level players memorize. But it seems like there are a lot more folks just playing for the joy of the game, and at the low levels, those folks will often outplay those who get very into the memorization too early.
My only problem with Go is that it can literally take days or weeks. That's just more patience than I have with a single game. I love the concept, but the time required for a single game is just too much for me. Even played in chunks.
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You start with a piece handicap. It's interesting for both because it makes it competitive, but also completely destroys the better player's knowledge base because they're missing important pieces, making it more about intuition.
I play this way with a friend that I'm like a thousand points higher rated than. With a rook+knight handicap, it's very competitive, we probably each win about half the time.
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To be fair Frenchman's cumsock is a winning play in 87% of chess matches
Kind of also something that changed with the advent of the internet.
Chess was popular for most of its history as a game where you basically only got better by playing and genuinely trying to work out better strategies. At best, you had some chess club or a book at hand.
Now, you could spend every day just reading up on different strategies and counters, and there'd still be someone more serious about it.
I guess, on the flipside, that makes it easier to not take it as serious anymore and we have ELO-based match-up systems now as well, so you'll more easily find someone on your level.
we have ELO-based match-up systems
I don't know, they look a little mismatched what with all the different instruments.
Really dude. I love chess, I used to play with my grandfather when I was like 8. So I have too good of a grip for most of my friends to want to play, but I'm not playing like it's a job to compete with people who read chess websites.
I joined a Chess Federation sponsored chess club in Omaha in my late 20s. Nothing is more humbling than getting beat by a 12-year-old.
Try Go.
Thatβs why you gotta stay solid and either go for the Jerome or the Bongcloud. Best 2 openings for beginners IMO.
A while ago I was grinding through the ranks of bots on an app and would only go to the next level when I could smash the current bot opening with bongcloud.
Someone from my local chess club has an account on Lichess where he only uses Bongcloud-like openings. He has reached a rating of over 2000 and crushed some 2200's (that's almost professional level for those who aren't familiar with ratings).
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Well, Knooks haven't yet become mainstream. Someone coded up a mod for chess where Knooks are pieces that move like Horseys and Rooks.
https://github.com/PossibleEmuWrangler/AnarchyChess-DreamyDesktop
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