540

Long Interviews (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 7 months ago by rambling_lunatic to c/linkedinlunatics

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[-] [email protected] 115 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

"... And the person doesn't even know..." This dude is bad at this.

Y'all, if you work in my field and I buy you lunch, it's because I'm trying to hire you.

But you won't have to wonder. I'll start the conversation with something subtle, like "I'm buying today because I'm trying to hire you."

It...uh...works. Really well. Stay tuned for more insightful tips, I guess.

[-] [email protected] 102 points 7 months ago

The guy is joking. It's obvious.

[-] [email protected] 35 points 7 months ago

So many people not catching an obvious joke 💀

[-] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

That's most of lemmy.

[-] Sabre363 31 points 7 months ago

The world would run so much better if more people would just say exactly what they mean or are trying to do.

[-] [email protected] 22 points 7 months ago

Don't know what jokes are, do ya

[-] [email protected] 24 points 7 months ago

Sorry, my AI model is only trained to understand good jokes

[-] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

Your ai needs to grasp context

[-] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

What "I'm interviewing someone and they don't even know" means is he reckons he's going to head hunt them at some point.

Of course there's always the possibility they'll turn the offer down. Also they do know because you get notified by linkedin whenever someone looks at your account. So they'll see this guy continuously creeping on them and pretty much know what's coming. The fact they haven't reached out themselves already probably indicates they're not interested.

[-] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago

Yep. And I'm saying that when he gets better at it, he will call them, ask them to grab lunch, and openly say at the start of lunch "I'm buying because there's this thing I might want to hire you for, and I want to talk about it during lunch".

I've head-hunted people over the course of five years, myself. But they knew it, because I bought them lunch at least once per year to talk about how I'm a fan of their work.

This dude is likely to be disappointed because while he's been thinking about job fit for 5 years, his ideal candidate hasn't thought about him at all.

[-] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

You still haven't figured out the story in the picture isn't real? Nobody's been interviewing anyone for five years.

[-] [email protected] -3 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

They're talking about stalking someone on LinkedIn.

Hi so over here we understand the concept of figurative speech. Would you like to come over here and stand on this side of the line, or are you going to be an idiot over there by yourself?

[-] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

It's a joke. I can only imagine working with you

[-] [email protected] 84 points 7 months ago

After 5 years of dating, either hire them or propose to them.

[-] [email protected] 8 points 7 months ago

What if I fire them and propose to them.

[-] [email protected] 24 points 7 months ago

Just do like Ipji from Futurama

Leela: But you never wore a ring, I didn't know you had a wife.
Ipji: And my wife doesn't know I have a job, I keep my personal and professional life separate.

[-] [email protected] 8 points 7 months ago

Do it in reverse. Propose to them and then fire them.

[-] [email protected] 46 points 7 months ago

What kind of mythical position would that be for? Assistant to the branch manager?

[-] archon 30 points 7 months ago

Wife.

[-] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago

That's got to be at least assistant REGIONAL manager

[-] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

The CEO of the c suite, not to be confused with the CEO of the company.

[-] merc 8 points 7 months ago

A 3 fucking hour interview?

A series of 1 hour interviews with different people is bad enough, but 3 hours?

If someone wants that much of my time, they better pay me.

[-] [email protected] 8 points 7 months ago

oh my god you guys these are satirical

[-] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

Gut is a brave agency for brave clients.

Except for the things where we're so risk adverse we'd rather let a dozen opportunities pass by than take a chance.

[-] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago

i’ve been just playing along, enjoying free lunches.

[-] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

Can't tell if this is a joke or not

[-] [email protected] -4 points 7 months ago

That last bit he's just confusing keeping your eyes open and ears to the ground with interviewing. (Hopefully it's someone at his company and essentially a succession plan, in such case yeah the dude probably knows.)

[-] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago

You can't seriously be this dense.

this post was submitted on 15 Dec 2023

540 points (97.5% liked)

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