I say "god damn you" to unwork the broken blessing system.
this post was submitted on 14 Oct 2023
740 points (100.0% liked)
196
16801 readers
2609 users here now
Be sure to follow the rule before you head out.
Rule: You must post before you leave.
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
Instead try this: Say "What?" And stare at them. Wait for them to explain. Act as though you do not know what a sneeze is. Allow them to explain the process of a sneeze. Tell them you have never experienced that in your life. Wait for them to get exasperated then in a dismissive way mention that you aren't sure you believe them, and change the subject.
Congratulations, you have won this interaction.
The ol' smooth shark maneuver
I like to say “acknowledged!” like Picard
"I'm going to sneeze."
"Make it so!"
"You may fire when ready."
"fire at Will."
His name is spelled with one "l"; "Wil"
(He'll probably block me for that, if he's on Lemmy)
I don't see anything wrong with gesundheit. It means health. And really I feel like the German expression is just saying - be healthy dammit, and stop sneezing!
You can also say "Schönheit – gesund biste ja": "Beauty – you're already healthy after all"
It used to be something to say to yourself. A little "fuck I hope I'm not next" prayer.
load more comments
(2 replies)
Gesundheit
Prosit
Mahlzeit!
People who intentionally yell when they sneeze can fuck off.
It feels very good, like physically itches the inside back of my throat (amazing if you're having an allergic response to something), while being deeply psychologically satisfying to yell from your abdomen. I try to only do it at home, but there's a reason some people scream-sneeze.
I vocalize pretty loudly when I sneeze and it’s entirely involuntary. I hate that I do it and I’ve tried to force myself to stop and it doesn’t work.
"Fucking grow up."
This was covered extensively on an episode of Seinfeld
“I’m sorry, I didn’t quite catch that.” - in a Siri voice “Nah, I’m good, thanks though.” “Dude! You scared the crap outta me!”
sneeze once "Bless you."
Sneeze twice "Gesundheit."
Sneeze three times "Ok now you're just fishing for attention."
Here is an alternative Piped link(s):
Ashley Johnson's reactions to Sam Riegel sneezes
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I'm open-source; check me out at GitHub.
"Satan curse you"
"I hate when you do that"
That's my favorite
I always 'shhhh' like a librarian would
Curse you.
I usually go with "None of that"
I like to say GOD BLESS YOU in the most dramatic exaggerated way possible immediately after I sneeze so I beat everyone to the punch. You can't bless me bitches.
"Don't you dare ask God to help me," Crawford reportedly snapped at the nurses praying at her bedside, before moments later the Academy Award winner took her final breath.
https://www.express.co.uk/entertainment/films/1749878/joan-crawford-final-words-spt
In Greece we say "Γείτσες", which is a dimunitive for "Υγεία" (=Health), so essentially its like wishing the other person to be healthy.
We say the same in the Netherlands, and sometimes we also say the equivalent for "cheers", not sure why though.
Sneezing isn't normal! I never sneeze.
I sneeze multiple times daily whenever I go outside because of ACHOO Syndrome (yes that is a real name lol)
You poor dear! You should see a doctor. IT IS NOT NORMAL TO SNEEZE!
"Well done" and "clean that up" are my favourites
"I disagree"
I always tell my partner to cut it out when they sneeze.
get any on you?
Ew
Yuk
view more: next ›