this post was submitted on 20 May 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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top 35 comments
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[–] [email protected] 51 points 23 hours ago* (last edited 23 hours ago)

Well played polite vampires! Otherwise you could have been subject to this rebuff!

[–] [email protected] 85 points 1 day ago (4 children)

Soulless ✅
Spreads misinformation ✅
Blood sucking parasite ✅
Needs to be invited into your life ✅
Run by a larger blood sucking parasite ✅
Turns people into other blood sucking parasites ✅

Vampires are just social media for the 1700s

[–] [email protected] 43 points 1 day ago

Also, unable to do any self-reflection

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 day ago

Describes the right wing propaganda machine too.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 23 hours ago

Knows all your private information ✅

[–] [email protected] 2 points 23 hours ago

Vampires are capitalism!

[–] [email protected] 62 points 1 day ago (5 children)

This is just stolen from a Terry Prachett Novel.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 day ago (1 children)

And I would have not read it if it was not "stolen".

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Then credit the author. That way people who enjoy it can know where it came from and may wind up reading his books.

So, yes. It was "stolen" as in plagiarized, since it does not provide appropriate credit.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 23 hours ago

"Plagiarism is cool and everyone should do it."

-King Louis XIV

[–] [email protected] -2 points 21 hours ago

Then credit the author.

The author was plagiarized by copying the genes of two parents. Credit the parents.

That way people who enjoy it can know where the author came from and may wind up reading his parents books.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 23 hours ago

It was also stolen (referencing?) Tomska's Let Me In sketch

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 day ago (4 children)

Which one? I've been meaning to give his stuff a shot. Something like this sounds like a fun place to start

[–] [email protected] 2 points 21 hours ago

Carpe Jugulum has vampires who 'reform' and integrate into society (but I won't spoil anything else)

[–] [email protected] 2 points 22 hours ago

Reading order

I'd start with either The Watch, or The Witches. Both are great, I'd avoid The Unseen University initially, his writing gets significantly better so the early books are harder to read.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

The Watch subseries mentions vampires quite a lot, and is a really good read. IIRC, the fifth elephant and thud! Have them as more than just ‘extras’ and names mentioned.

While you can pick up most any discworld book as a first one, and have a good time, a lot of people recommend reading at least the sub series in order, the watch series starts with Guards! Guards! And is really enjoyable all the way through, and a great place to start your discworld journey.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 22 hours ago* (last edited 22 hours ago)

Replied to wrong comment

[–] [email protected] 3 points 22 hours ago

I see Terry Pratchett, I upvote! GNU

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

Come on man. Bury the hatchet, with Terry Pratchet.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 23 hours ago

Don't let them in! It's a trick!

[–] Sixtyforce 30 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Nah I'm in if ageless isn't false too.

Just not immortal, 'cuz the Sun sure isn't.

[–] Corkyskog 6 points 1 day ago (3 children)

But the sun hurts vampires, wouldn't they be happier without it? At least until everything else dies and they starve.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 day ago

Hahahaha jokes on everyone else, the sun already burns my when I step outside.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 day ago

Happy little popsicles

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago (2 children)

That's what he meant there will be a sun death and it would be horrifying to still be forced to be alive

[–] Sixtyforce 2 points 22 hours ago

Yeah I'm not into hanging out inside a Red Giant/White Dwarf/Black Dwarf/Floating for trillions of years watching Heat Death personally.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 22 hours ago

No worries for that. The sun will come and visit them in person before it goes.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

you wanna be here forever?

[–] Sixtyforce 1 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

Certainly not, but at least as long as humans are still around.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

that's what I meant, i doubt I'd want to be alive even for a few centuries, one will be much more than enough

[–] Sixtyforce 1 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

I'd rather live as long as possible, the idea doesn't seem to bother me oddly enough. I've thought it through and still think I'd prefer extended life lifespan. I could elaborate, but people don't generally like hearing my views on such things so I'm not going to.

That said, I think your opinion is the most common that I've heard, and it's understandable.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 14 hours ago

ok well I guess good luck on your quest of becoming a vampire

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago
[–] Plebcouncilman 5 points 1 day ago

Nice try globalists