this post was submitted on 29 Dec 2024
777 points (97.1% liked)

Microblog Memes

6079 readers
2254 users here now

A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

Rules:

  1. Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
  2. Be nice.
  3. No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
  4. Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.

Related communities:

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 117 points 4 days ago (3 children)

The proper terminology is WAN - a Wide Anal Network.

[–] [email protected] 40 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Got 3 bathrooms in my house does that make a local anal network?

[–] captain_aggravated 27 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Would a bedpan be a Personal Anal Network?

[–] [email protected] 17 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I believe that would be an air gapped device, or a thumb drive.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 days ago
[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 days ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 days ago (2 children)

This one is disgustingly accurate..

Due to the Honeywagon

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 days ago

Any network I join is a wide anal network

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 55 points 4 days ago (3 children)

I never thought I'd feel so isolated on my septic system...

[–] [email protected] 14 points 4 days ago

You’re connected through your leech fields and the water table, maybe? Kinda like that one friend trying to connect on their mobile hotspot. Everyone still loves them.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Decentralized encrypting shitting

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] kambusha 46 points 4 days ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 30 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Gonna need fiber for that.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 days ago

Just like a data network, fiber makes the transfers faster.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 days ago

poot poot

Pick up the fart phone

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 days ago

Stream of subconscious

[–] [email protected] 31 points 4 days ago

I'll leave this here...

[–] [email protected] 33 points 4 days ago

One word -

Airgap

[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 days ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 days ago

Makes me feel very connected, thanks.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 days ago

Ew, thanks I love it

[–] [email protected] 16 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I'm on a private intranet then. I have a septic system.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] ohellidk 24 points 4 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 days ago (7 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 days ago

I need more broadband because my upload is too big

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 days ago

there's enough data in my bum i don't want more

load more comments (5 replies)
[–] [email protected] 22 points 4 days ago (3 children)

When you open Lemmy you are connected to every persons phone and can ruin their day in an instant.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 4 days ago

I mean, I come across a lot of off putting comments, but I am sure others think the same of mine. We all deserve each other, yaay \o/

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 days ago

There is an air gap. You're safe.

But if water splashes up then it's GAME OVER MAN.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 4 days ago

OH my friend reminded me I'm on a septic tank? how can I get my butthole connected pls

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 days ago
[–] [email protected] 10 points 4 days ago

Aka the sphincternet.

[–] benderbeerman 7 points 4 days ago (1 children)

So a p-trap is kinda like a butt firewall then

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 days ago

Reading this while on the shitter

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 days ago

Guess it’s the ~~Fediverse~~ shittyverse

[–] r4venw 5 points 4 days ago (4 children)

I've had this recurring nightmare for the last twenty or so years where I go to sit on a toilet and a disembodied hand comes out of the drain-hole hand first and touches my butt.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 days ago (1 children)

What are your thoughts on skibidi toilet?

[–] r4venw 2 points 3 days ago

Honestly terrifies me

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 days ago

Enshittification of the buttnet must continue!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 days ago (1 children)

And your nose and mouth is connected to everyone too.
All in the vast ocean of air. You are inhaling what others exhale.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 days ago (1 children)

At first read this as massaged, and that context definitely puts this in a different light

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 days ago

This is actually a joke from the Blue Man Group's The Complex tour (not saying it's a "stolen joke").

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 days ago

It's a comforting thought 😌

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 days ago (1 children)

upload only... at least on my side, one large packet at the time, or a bunch of small packets depending on recent past diet

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 days ago

Interfacing through the porcelain terminal, Case jacked into the waste-processing network

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Move to a house with a septic tank

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 days ago

Why? Butt network is life.

load more comments
view more: next ›