men

For example, if a man divorces at 50, it would be hard to find a 50 year old woman.

Why? Do women tend to die at 49?

Obviously 50 year olds are in the dating pool. The man is one of them.

Women tend to live longer, right? Especially when they're unmarried, so you'd think it'd be even easier for a divorced 50 year old to find an older partner.

They are adults. They can date who they want. It's not creepy or wrong. People should stay out of the private business of other adults. If it makes the couple happy, more power to them, I say.

I believe it's important to avoid a blanket judgment when it comes to these cases, as labeling all of them as creepy oversimplifies the situation. Each case should be considered individually.

For instance, if a man is drawn to a much younger woman solely due to her age, that does raise concerns. Similarly, if he's pursuing younger women for the sake of exerting control, that's undeniably unsettling.

On the other hand, if a man genuinely values a woman's personality, appreciates her qualities, and they share a mutual affection, there shouldn't be an issue. Assuming that a woman is being exploited solely due to a significant age difference undermines her intellectual capabilities.

It's vital not to rush to judgment without the full context.

The law of "does it seem creepy" is easy to understand.

It's 1/2 your age plus 7.

as long both adults are happy, why should anyone have the right to break the relationship up because it's not compatible with their personal, post-liberal moral compass?

This is a good question and I’m glad you asked. What often gets ignored is that the detail of “two consenting adults” bit. I think it depends.

The ages of 18-21 are so different and full of experience and change. Lots of firsts for many, and going out into the world... I’d say it’s not only creepy, but predatory for someone to date that age range when they are decades older. It’s not the behavior of a mature adult to seek the company of inexperienced adults.

This actually happened to my sister when she was barely 18, groomed by a much older coworker. He was the first guy to pay attention to her. She never had a youth after that. But she did have a kid. Now she’s essentially caring for a teenager and a grandpa.

It depends on how big the age gap is, what the power balance is, etc. Like a 18yo with a 28yo is not the same as a 50yo with a 60 yo

If you have to worry whether it’s creepy, it’s probably creepy.

Weird post, but even weirder replies from you OP. You seem to have a direct connection to this subject and I'm leaving towards the idea that you've been called a creep a few times.

“Creepy” is a word that should be used for Halloween IMO. I think the societal standards are something like (half age +7) for the older person in the relationship.

Doesn't Leonardo dump them when they get to a certain age?

The double standard is that men get judged harshly. Society has to change it's attitude.

This discussion is a clear indicator that men judge each other quite harshly on the topic. The absolutist attitudes portrayed by some members here are the exact problem we are dealing with.

I am glad however that there are more sane members here than unsane --> "it depends" is the answer.

I think the larger issue is that men's sexuality is demonized by both traditionalists and feminists. If it's not age gap, it'll be something else.
As for me, I realized in my divorce that the family court system's bias is to protect itself (the state). If they think your soon-to-be-wife isn't capable of supporting herself, they will move as much money from you to her as is possible. So I narrowed my acceptable prospects to within 5% of my income, 10% of my age, and minor children are now a deal breaker.
Which in my area shrank my dating pool size to zero. No great loss on either side.

as long as its not one person waiting for the other to turn 18, its not creepy. it might be odd but whatever.

It really depends. In general there are maturity gaps along with age gaps. 25 is still pretty young maturity wise. Which is fine if the other person is in thier 30's. I couldn't see myself being with anyone under 30 now that I'm in my 40's.

But, to each thier own.

Yes

Sometimes when the difference is too big, I get a strange feeling about it - but I also don't like to judge people. But there is always a potential for a bad power dynamic since older people will often have more material mean and maybe more important life experience, to play the emotional immaturity of the younger person. But that's the same for women and man, and is more a case by case thing.

Ahem... ex bartender here. ANYONE over the age of 21 who seeks out and dates people under 21 is at VERY LIKELY a person who would have sex with a child.

The scenario is as such: people over 21 ply their underage dates with alcohol. EVERY time they go out. It is the basis of the relationship. The young girl will often be the only one in a group of all guys and she'll always be overdressed (seen it a million times) and the girl is always already drunk when they got to my bar. But I would ID and then they'd get mad and leave. But yea. If you're under 21 dating an over 21 year old 9 times out of 10 the older person is supplying alcohol to the younger GF.

So that being said I am disgusted by those age gaps. Because you cannot lie to me, I'm no fool. That isn't a healthy relationship pretty much ever.