this post was submitted on 05 Nov 2024
239 points (95.1% liked)

Funny

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 12 hours ago

Clearly, I'd put on my robe and wizard hat.

[–] VicksVaporBBQrub 7 points 13 hours ago

Somebody call the locksmith!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 12 hours ago

CLANK CLANK CLANK CLANK CLANK CLANK

[–] [email protected] 4 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

Ok if you are wearing that then I'm wearing a wig, corset and big puffy dress.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 12 hours ago* (last edited 12 hours ago)

gotta one-up her in masculinity, make sure the frills are at least twice the size of yourself, and the shoes pointy enough to inflict stab wounds.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 12 hours ago

Jolly cooperation is what I'd do

[–] [email protected] 71 points 1 day ago

Seems like a good knight out.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 16 hours ago

Invite her back to my place for some jousting.

[–] [email protected] 61 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Naughty jokes aside, I would love that, laugh my ass off, and look forward to an amazing date.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 21 hours ago

Bras are bad enough, now I have to learn how to take off a hauberk?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 18 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 day ago

I put on my robe and wizard hat. If the date goes well, maybe I'll show her my wand of magic missile.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 16 hours ago

If it wasn't the plan already, changing them to Medieval Times.

[–] [email protected] 41 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Going on a quest? Fuck yeah

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Nope. Going ice skating and then out for sushi.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 21 hours ago

Wearing a full suit of armor, accomplishing either IS quite the quest 😄

[–] IrateAnteater 11 points 1 day ago

Close enough.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Break out some coconuts and become her faithful steed.

[–] VicksVaporBBQrub 3 points 12 hours ago

He have ridden the length and breadth of the land in search of knights who will join his court at Camelot.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 16 hours ago

Oh... So I guess I can pass for a Wizard...

[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I challenge her to a duel. If I win, I gain her hand in marriage. If she wins... I suppose I would have to give her my hand in marriage.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 day ago

Win - Win sort of plan you have.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago

I see what you did there

[–] ArbitraryValue 29 points 1 day ago

Finally I could say "m'lady" without shame.

[–] Sendpicsofsandwiches 21 points 1 day ago

Pledge fealty and marry her immediately

[–] [email protected] 6 points 21 hours ago

Hope she Lays on Hands me

[–] [email protected] 9 points 23 hours ago

Make sure the pageboys are still around, cause getting in that mail is gonna be a team effort.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 day ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 20 hours ago

"Lo, see ye her, all gleamin' in her plate, like some manner of queen, sittin' high in her gilded carriage, thinkin' herself bettr' than us 'cause of her fine metal and steed of silver."

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 day ago
[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 day ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Drive to Constantinople, to party like it's 1204

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago

What a Dame!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (4 children)

Taking off that chainmail will rip half of her hair off. If that's your thing...

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

She should be okay if she's wearing one of those hair things underneath. I forget what they're called. It bunches up your hair like a shower cap and keeps your hair from getting in the armor

Edit: the girl here is not wearing one it seems though

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 day ago

It's called a coif. They also serve a critical part in terms of shock absorption.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 day ago

Why would she ever take that off?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 13 hours ago

Thats a kind of a turnoff

[–] _core 1 points 20 hours ago

Typically a person wears a cap of some sort under the chainmail so that hair doesn't get entangled.

[–] alci -2 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

Too much makeup ! Deal breaker.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 12 hours ago

Definitely pretty pointy elbows