this post was submitted on 30 Jan 2024
880 points (90.7% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

25936 readers
2990 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 152 points 6 months ago (3 children)

As an American, I cannot legally touch any egg that hasn't been ultra-pasteurized followed by continuous cold chain refrigeration and served in either a Styrofoam or pulped paper cardboard egg carton.

[–] [email protected] 43 points 6 months ago (4 children)

I think you have been misinformed. As an American, I can harvest eggs just like the pictured ones from my own backyard on a regular basis.

They don't even cost any money, they come out of chicken asses for free.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 6 months ago (2 children)

You must have weird chickens. My lay eggs out if their cloaca.

[–] thegoodyinthehoody 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Isn’t their asshole like inside the cloaca?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago

Their colon is. The coloaca is their asshole, and pee hole, and egg hole.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 6 months ago (2 children)

What a noob. Ours come from shops. That way, our entire fuckin garden doesn't smell like a crashed ammonia tanker

[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago

As a side note, if your chicken coop smells like a crashed ammonia tanker you need to add more carbon in the coop. Dead leaves, cardboard, shredded wood or wood chips are working well.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Sorry your yard is so small. Mine is large enough that the chicken coop is far away from the house and is usually not a bother. Summertime when the wind is just wrong can be an annoying stench, but it's almost nothing compared to the smell of dumpsters in a big city during summer heat.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 6 months ago (1 children)

We call our yards "metres" and they're a little bit bigger than yours

[–] [email protected] -5 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Off topic pedantry, great response

[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 months ago

Sir, this is a ~~Wendy's~~ shitpost community.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)

You have no idea how big I can live. What if I told you that I knew a guy who can turn you into a walrus?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago

I'd say pass whatever you've got, I'll take a snort.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)

This instantly reminded me of an old Mitchell and Webb sketch lol

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

Mitchell and Webb

Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

I'm open-source; check me out at GitHub.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

Let’s not pretend the acquisition and upkeep of chickens is free… if you eat a lot of eggs it is absolutely worth it, but there is some cost in setting up a coop, getting chickens, keeping chickens fed and safe from predators, disease, etc.

Plus you have to have property to keep them on and be allowed to have them on your property. For most Americans that isn’t possible due to lack of home ownership or HOA restrictions on what animals you can have on “your” property. (HOAs are bullshit)

[–] [email protected] 34 points 6 months ago (1 children)

This is pulped paper cardboard, is it not?

[–] [email protected] 44 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 30 points 6 months ago (1 children)

It's so nice of you to gift it to them!

[–] [email protected] 19 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I just noticed the mistake and I knew one of you smart asses was going to call me out before I message to fix it :(

[–] [email protected] 23 points 6 months ago (2 children)

You message to fix it? What, you have staff to do it for you?

[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I don't even know how the fuck that happened. I give up.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago

Except the ones with girlfriends called Ruth, obv

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

Hah, jokes on you. I'm a DUMBass. :p

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago

“Y’all’s eggs AREN'T chlorine washed? Ewww unsanitary”