this post was submitted on 22 Nov 2024
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[–] [email protected] 158 points 6 days ago (6 children)

This is not biblically accurate. She should be naked, since she doesn’t yet have knowledge of good and evil, and god considers nudity evil, because he is a prude. But also he didn’t clothe Adam and Eve, cause he’s a perv.

[–] [email protected] 53 points 5 days ago

My quip with the artistic choice is that they made Eve have very very long hair which could have served as breast cover. But they chose to add the inaccurate leaves...

[–] [email protected] 33 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Also bellybutton shouldn't exist on Adam and Eve.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 days ago (2 children)

How do you think god counted them? Poke a finger in the belly.

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[–] GhiLA 7 points 5 days ago

or should it...

no, no, a birthing God entity is a gross thought, stop...

[–] [email protected] 17 points 5 days ago

It's actually just for support, they're pretty heavy

[–] [email protected] 13 points 5 days ago (9 children)

And the bible never says the fruit was an apple

[–] [email protected] 19 points 5 days ago (4 children)

Given the era, I wouldn't be surprised if it was actually a fig

[–] EmoDuck 16 points 5 days ago (1 children)

It's the garden of eden so there's no reason to believe that it's a fruit we have. My head canon is that it was a giant, fruit shaped flaming hot Cheeto

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 days ago

So it was a FIG-ticious fruit?

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 days ago

The comic is obviously of a theatre reproduction of the event.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 days ago (3 children)

To be fair they also didn’t have genitals since they can’t Fuck, so maybe they literally have nothing to be ashamed of.

Unrelated but they also shouldn’t have belly buttons because they weren’t born.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 5 days ago (4 children)

I don't think that interpretation, i. e. the absent genitals, is canon.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 5 days ago

so NOW we're drawing the line?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 days ago (1 children)

today's kids have the wildest headcanons smh

I still ship mary and god tho

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 days ago (1 children)

...then how do they have children? where did Cain and Abel come from?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 5 days ago (1 children)

...and where did all the people that came after Cain and Abel come from? Who was their mother?

[–] EmoDuck 7 points 5 days ago (3 children)

Cain and Able weren't Adam and Eves only children. Keep in mind that canonically, Adam lived for over 900 years. That's a lot of time you can use to make more babies.

After the whole regicide incident, they also had Seth. Both him and his exiled brother ended up marrying their sisters. Their descendants did the same. So yeah, it's all incest, top to bottom.

The biblical flood was actually created to wipe out the descendants of Cain, since Noah and his cousins wife were both descendants of Seth

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 days ago

Damn TIL! So much for my religious education.

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago (2 children)

No genitals? Where did Eve’s children came from? She shat them?

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[–] [email protected] 78 points 6 days ago (2 children)

Bottomless but not topless? Eden was a wild place!

[–] [email protected] 37 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

Just like Winnie the Pooh in the Hundred Acre Wood

[–] [email protected] 23 points 5 days ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 35 points 5 days ago (2 children)

This implies that the garden of Eden was in the US as they're the only ones that know what pumpkin spice even is.

[–] [email protected] 49 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

Her wearing a bra even before having a bite suggests that too.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 days ago

was going to say, she was supposed to be naked.

[–] EmoDuck 5 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Maybe 10 years ago but nowadays it's internationally much more ubiquitous

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I don't think many places share this seasonal pumpkin obsession.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 days ago

Sure they do. Marketing people will try to sell us anything they can imagine. Maybe we'll have a Thanksgiving in Finland at some point. We already have Black Friday. Great excuse to sell more stuff.

[–] agamemnonymous 15 points 6 days ago (2 children)

The "apple" was a persimmon?

[–] [email protected] 37 points 6 days ago (7 children)

Actually, the Bible just says it's the fruit of a tree.

It could have been an orange, pomegranate, or banana.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 days ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 days ago

A nut, bit right through the shell

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 days ago

Weed, they got baked and leaned the knowledge of good and evil.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Pomegranates are one of the oldest cultivated fruits, so they're somewhat plausible, but I'm fairly certain humans made oranges (and most other citruses, through selection and grafting... though I guess it could have been a mandarin, pomelo, or citron, which seem to be the three we started with) and bananas (through selection and cloning), so it couldn't have been those.

Apples, on the other hand, seem to have existed long before humans, so they're definitely a possibility.

It was probably some kind of nut, though.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 days ago

Apples existed, but they looked and tasted nothing like they do now. Today's apples are sweet and swole and that's brought to you by selective breeding and a growth strategy that extended beyond cider to dominate the mobile phone industry.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 days ago

I've been wondering about this for a while, and I've come to the conclusion that blackberries are probably the original thing. Brambles grow like weeds all over Europe, I don't think anyone is cultivating them to be different. Apples definitely have had a human hand in selecting the best apples to start fresh orchards with.

I'm open to correction though.

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[–] funkless_eck 9 points 5 days ago

"apple" used to just mean "fruit"

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