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submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[-] [email protected] 165 points 1 month ago

Even if this image were real, and it was provable that it was the biblical Goliath, how in the fuck does that have anything to do with disproving evolution lol

[-] [email protected] 116 points 1 month ago

Christians: "Well, you see, God was right because the Bible was proved true. That's why it disproves your silly science.

The Bible contains everything about life! If it's not in there, it doesn't exist!"

People: "Show me where in the Bible it has kangaroos."

Christians: "We're being oppressed!"

[-] [email protected] 24 points 1 month ago

I absolutely love it when the crazy Christians try to pull the "If it's not in the Bible, it doesn't exist!" thing because at that point most everything they use on an every day basis must all be fictional things that don't exist.

Internet? Not in the Bible.

Smart phones? Nope.

Cars? Not a chance.

Facebook? Haell No.

TV? They wish.

[-] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

Or they give you one of these "what year is?" "2024" "2024 what?" "AD: "and what does AD stand for?"

[-] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

"We've taken over the governments of world powers and forced our Christ-centric numbering system to be standard, therefore we must have been right all along!"

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[-] [email protected] 116 points 1 month ago

"Finally found some credible evidence"

[-] [email protected] 24 points 1 month ago

Seymour! Your pants are on fire!

[-] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago

Haha, no mother. It's just the Northern Lights.

[-] [email protected] 86 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Fun fact: If (big if) Goliath really existed, he was probably suffering from acromegaly. It is characterized by a person not stopping to grow after puberty. The reason for that is an enlarged, tumorous pituary gland in the brain. So David hitting Goliath between the eyes might actually have ruptured the tumour, leading to internal bleeding in his brain and killing Goliath.

So the whole biblical story might be based on something that actually happened and then probably got more and more dramaticised every time it was told.

[-] [email protected] 73 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

It could also be based on any random tall dude dying from getting hit in the face by a flying rock, rare medical condition or not.

[-] [email protected] 56 points 1 month ago

Or maybe getting hit in the head by a rock launched from a sling is enough to make a person's head basically explode.

Seriously, a competent sling user can easily kill someone with one.

[-] TopRamenBinLaden 18 points 1 month ago

I found a quick little video demonstration of a guy using a sling and stone against a ballistic gel head.

Just judging off of that, I would agree that weird tumors would not need to be involved for a sling to kill a large fellow.

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[-] [email protected] 50 points 1 month ago

Hitting someone square in the forehead with a rock, in the Bronze Age, was a quick way to kill them regardless of size. There's a reason this image

is both iconic and incredibly triggering to the IDF. You whip that thing around hard and fast enough, and you're going to crack a head.

So the whole biblical story might be based on something that actually happened

I don't find the story of a young, spry soldier with a bit of luck and some good aim thwacking a rival warlord with a rock implausible in the slightest. Its all the propaganda packed in around the story, what with David having some sort of euphoric epiphany and the rock being magicked by God to score the killing blow, that causes folks to roll their eyes in disbelief.

[-] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Also he totally fought a lion before he went up against Goliath. David was a bigger badass than Goliath the entire time

Can you tell me more about that picture?

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[-] [email protected] 34 points 1 month ago

It probably isn't even all that dramatacized,

It is not hard at all to do serious damage with a genuinely made sling, there's a reason people wielding those things operated as a military unit in ancient times, and they were pretty mean spirited folks too!

They'd actually write insults and jokes on the stones like "CATCH ME!", "HEADS UP!" "OUCH!" "BONK!"

Basically the historical inaccuracies would be in terminology rather than exact action, and also in David not following the shot up with "THINK FAST CHUCKLENUTS!"

[-] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Imagine being a 6ft dude and some little bastard pulls out a gun and shoots you dead while the town cheers about that how courageous that little shit is.

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[-] lurch 80 points 1 month ago

lol how is goliath proof for creationism. it's just some big rando. this is so silly

[-] [email protected] 37 points 1 month ago

Is wine not proof of creationism? Pretty sure there was wine in the bible and I've definitely seen wine irl. Checkmate.

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[-] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago

God created one very big dude one time specifically so that his Prophesized God-King could bean the giant in the head with a big rock. We know this to be true because of this definitely real and serious image of a big fossilized human skull.

If evolution were real, we'd have an entire genetic lineage of giants running around. But we don't, because no other very absolutely credibly real super-sized skulls have ever appeared in a picture before.

So, checkmate Atheists.

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[-] [email protected] 50 points 1 month ago

At 7 cubits tall his skull would still not be that big. They should have claimed it was a nephilim skull instead.

[-] [email protected] 24 points 1 month ago
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[-] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

1.8806 " 1880.6 microsmoots. Approximately one kit without the kaboodle.

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[-] [email protected] 43 points 1 month ago

Also Goliath was canonically 9 ft 9 inches tall. That fake skull alone is at least 2 feet tall. The average proportion of head to body height in humans is a ratio of 1:7.5. So the owner of this skull would likely be at least 15 feet tall. Much larger than Goliath.

[-] [email protected] 25 points 1 month ago

Maybe he was the original Funko Pop?

[-] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago

Goliath was actually built like Ivankov from One Piece

[-] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago

HEEEEEEE HAAAAAAAAW!!!!!!

[-] [email protected] 38 points 1 month ago

Also curious as to how it ended up it central Italy.

[-] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago

A wizard did it.

[-] funkless_eck 10 points 1 month ago

if you like me are curious where the battle was meant to have taken place it's here: https://maps.app.goo.gl/KGYCh7dmVGvcJ9CD6

tbh not that difficult to sail to Italy so I guess the case is still open

[-] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

First they would have to carry the head to the coast which is no easy task without a Toyota. You make it sound like crossing the Mediterranean is easy but storms are frequent and problematic. The ancient Israelites were not known for their seafaring prowess. In fact, they once got lost in the desert for 40 fucking years, so their ability to navigate by the stars is doubtful. Once they arrived in Italy, then, they would have had to cart that monstrosity hundreds of miles to Rome. And remember, this was before all road led there so, even more difficult. Finally, one should ask themselves why they would bother.

[-] funkless_eck 9 points 1 month ago

well some people would do anything for head

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[-] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

And how it was exposed to the elements, sitting on the forest floor, and yet survived…. Remarkably intact…

[-] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

God works in mysteeeeeerious ways...

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[-] [email protected] 35 points 1 month ago

I mean, Goliath was called a giant but wasn't "my skull is the size of a full grown man's torso" big. He is said to be about 9'-9'9". Which, if there was historical legitimacy to the story, could easily be within the range of a very tall person that had their height exaggerated over time.

[-] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Agreed. Units are hard and for most of history there wasn't a wiki where you could look up the conversion between cubits, greek feet, roman feet, italian feet, french feet, and english feet to maybe get to some idea of how tall the "huge guy" was.

[-] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

Yeah, also, imagine in the bronze age, a shaq sized dude was found and trained to be an elite warrior. I could totally see the men of that era, who encountered him in battle, telling tall tails of a 9 foot giant they had to fight.

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[-] [email protected] 32 points 1 month ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago)

Goliath died outside of Jerusalem, too, not Rome. And his people were Greek, not Roman, so it’s not like his remains would be taken back to Rome. And if he really was such a champion, his remains wouldn’t be left in a random forest with no marker or ruins about.

EDIT: No time for the old “Philistines aren’t Greeks,” love, I’ve just come to read the meter.

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[-] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago

It's on a random Facebook page, it must be true

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[-] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

Thw fuck is the image is it Photoshop or ai? Or did someone just berry a fuck off big skull.

[-] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago
[-] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

I can do maths not English

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[-] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

Bone apple tea

[-] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago
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[-] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Uh, no, the side was smashed in.

edit: all talking about between the eyes, but i learned from that part in religion lessons that the temple is a weak point on our skull.
Difference between european and american version?

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[-] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

We know he was only 9 feet tall, too. This skull is way too fucking big to be Goliath. Or even real.

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this post was submitted on 14 Jun 2024
694 points (98.9% liked)

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