MORTIFIED. So thoroughly distressed he got his picture taken to be in the Mail.
Absolutely DISPERAGED to find the therapy seems to be doing an alright job. Very unhappy with the service, he is telling everyone he "definitely doesn't recommend how amazingly effective it is, especially since there's not a kickback for referrals. He HATES it, everyone!
He does not, in any way, still have a micro dork that gives him constant issues. No way, guys. No way.
He just bought a Cybertruck, in fact. It's amazing. It's so great. His penis is fine, everyone. It's not inverted at all when he thinks people are judging his ability to perform. It's absolutely throbbing, everyone! It's all great. Go buy a Cybertruck!
There is nothing wrong with, and everything right about, small penises. The more we mock men’s behavior and bodies, the more we ourselves create awful 4×4 behavior.
All penises are good. Sometimes the people attached are awful.
Alternatively, imagine saying this about another body part on another gender.
This is some small titty energy.
... It doesn't hit the same.
Girls with small titties don't overcompensate by buying land rovers
Does anyone with any particular body characteristic overcompensate by purchasing a land rover or it it just meant to mock them by associating them with something they, and the person making the association, perceive as negative?
I think the idea is that if you feel the need to have a powerful status symbol like a Range Rover or a Porsche then the only explanation is that you just desire the status symbol of "Big Man". The old joke is then that they feel the need to be a big man because they feel ashamed about something else like having a small willy.
So you're saying that it's shameful to have a small penis and it's OK to look down on people based on their penis size?
That's the assertion your theory is dependent on.
I know it's rare to think about things we say often but really try and think about it, it's a dumb thing to say and continuing it simply because it's commonly said would be really dumb - not everyone with a small penis is a rage filled monster but forcing these cruel assertions that someone with a small penis is likely to be the sort of loser that drives a Porsche does make it more likely someone with a small penis will fixate on it and suffer social anxiety because of it.
Where can I get these?
Just call 0121-824-0432 and they’ll fix your twig and berries.
Anyone tried the number? I'm asking for a friend.
That's the old number, the new one is 0118 999 881 999 119 7253
So easy to remember
I used to work in a print shop, we made things like business cards and stuff, and we used to use that as our lorem ipsum of phone numbers.
Although because we're not savages like you are we used to write it correctly 0118 999 881 999 119 725 ... 3
Need an American version of this
Agreed - an American version of the NHS would be a massive improvement over what we have now.
They're by Foka Wolf: https://www.fokawolf.com/pages/downloads
direct link to pdf: https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0721/5687/3008/files/4x4_a3.pdf?v=1679586392
I’m always uncomfortable cuz ppl on the internet made me think this is body shaming
Not b/c we care about the driver but other guys who are rockin’ le petite weiners
This is the way I look at it. I don't care if someone is homosexual because honestly no one's sexuality is my business. However, I mercilessly mock the conservatives who keep getting caught fucking same sex partners because of the hypocrisy.
There's nothing shameful about a small dick. Use what you've got, we've all got talents. There is something shameful about feeling so insecure about some aspect of yourself that you'll get a big ass vehicle that you'll never get full use out of because you refuse to address your insecurities. The small dick comments are just where we "meet them where they live".
Hell, I've got a truck because I haul shit a couple of times a week. It's not my main mode of transportation but I do drive it. If I got one of these because someone saw my truck unloaded I'd laugh my ass off. But there are definitely people who feel the need to prove some shit and would clutch all their pearls over a piece of paper from a stranger.
A truck's okay because it's actually utility vehicle. Just as long as it's not one of those big stupid American style ones.
But a lot of modern 4x4s can't actually operate off road very well. If Jeremy Clarkson mocks them for having one (and he's said as much) then you know it's bad.
But you've invented that they brought their car because of a small penis it's unlikely to actually be true.
Would you joke that a random black guy driving a Lamborghini is insecure about the color of his skin and post a little flier using race to mock him? Of course not.
Also, a complimentary colonoscopy for the butt hurt.
I need to print up a bunch of cards saying, “If you fuck like you park you’ll never get it in,” for all the absurd parking jobs I see.
Damn we need some of those out here
At least in America there's a chance they go off-roading.
I do wonder what happens on twisty country roads when two chodes driving IFVs need to pass each other.
Speaking from personal experience one hugs a ditch and the other eases by til theyre past
Niccceee....
Wait, this isn't the onion?
Shit. That's so brilliant. I think I'll have to do this.
Let us know if it works. I think any gain of 2cm or more is probably worthwhile.
I have never seen a Land Rover being driven by a man. They're chick buses here.
That's Range Rovers, at least Land Rovers actually are off-road vehicles, even if they don't use them like that, but Range Rovers get bogged down in a grassy field.
Yo man my 2011 Subaru Forester is a 4x4 wtf I already know I'm insecure
Why would a lesbian need a penis enlargement
For anyone not getting the joke, Subaru has the LGBTQ+ market basically cornered. The forester also got the nickname lesbo sled...and they're fucking awesome cars as well.
Now, I just need to purchase a 4x4.
Brillant
No foul language - i.e. French 🤮
Obviously satire, dozy wankers
