this post was submitted on 01 Jun 2024
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[–] [email protected] 100 points 6 months ago (3 children)

Damn morning people, idk why we night folks let them define things like business hours, we could have had everything opening at like 2PM instead :/

One ~~day~~ night we'll take it back...

[–] [email protected] 40 points 6 months ago

Night gang rise... at 2pm

[–] [email protected] 32 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Oh we're all going nocturnal with this climate. It will be necessary. Maybe subterranean, too.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 5 months ago

Don't threaten me with a good time

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Cause us morning people can't stay up past 10 without significant effort!!

[–] [email protected] 23 points 5 months ago

Sounds like it’ll be a you problem when we finally take over

[–] [email protected] 77 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I hate waking up at 11. Always feels like your day just flies by.

[–] [email protected] 79 points 6 months ago

Sure, but in return your night just keeps going and going until you go to sleep at 4am.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 6 months ago (1 children)

It does. It's half over by that point.

[–] [email protected] 39 points 6 months ago (1 children)

My day is from 4AM to 4AM not 12AM to 12AM.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

My best case is having about 20-24 hour long waking part of the day and then 7-10 hours of sleep. We need to slow this planet tf down, why rotate so fast!?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 months ago (1 children)

No worries, moon slows down earths rotation by about 1.8 milliseconds per century. You'll have your 30 hour day in about a billion years.

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[–] [email protected] 52 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Me laying in bed wondering if they smell the jizz.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

Sometimes it’s hard to smell something that’s all over you, you don’t know till you take a shower and go back to your room that you stank af

I always suggest airing out your room while you shower

[–] [email protected] 38 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I wash my sheets once a year whether they need it or not so that’s not a problem in my world.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 6 months ago

Ah yes. Sound advice from SatansMaggotyCumFart.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

Ooh la la, the Queen Victoria treatment!

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago

I don’t give a fuck about the queen.

The mushrooms I forage off them are about fifty percent of my diet.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Then the dog comes in, and smells a snack he can lick up, while you try to keep them away, and play it off cool.........but that dog REALLY wants that snack!

And thats when your friends walk into you getting an unwanted bj from a dog, and everybody is like "OH MY GOOOOOODDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!"

And you're like "wait, no, I can explain!!!"

I'm imagining it like it could have been a scene in "Theres something about mary"

[–] [email protected] 20 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Do you often think about getting head from a dog?

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

My 6AM friends all start falling asleep around 9PM. Meanwhile, I'm awake until 2AM. There's a place for night owls and society needs us.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 5 months ago

Yeah society needs us but doesn't want to pay shit for most night work. I hate waking up at 6 but I gotta make money.

[–] [email protected] 37 points 5 months ago (2 children)

6am friends could have also brought about world peace, but no, they had to wake up the 11am friend.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 months ago

And not grab me an extra muffin or something to eat for breakfast...

Grab an extra plate for a bro if you gonna be awake that early anyway! You know you're gonna need my ass to get everyone's collective shit together at 1am, so we can all get back safely; why the disrespect for us "late wake's"?

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[–] [email protected] 35 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Why can't people just compromise at a time like 10 AM instead of dying on their mutually incompatible hills?

[–] [email protected] 17 points 5 months ago (1 children)

For real tho.
Why are we playing by morning people rules? We need to make some decisions in late afternoon after morning people already went to sleep, those lazy bastards! :D

[–] [email protected] 14 points 5 months ago (1 children)

They made the plan before the rest of us woke up. At least we are considerate when people might be asleep

[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Yeah, all morning ppl are loud af - it's as if it's some kind of rule or a dominance tactic to keep us in check.

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 months ago

Because most places run on morning person hours. If you don't get up early enough you can't get everything done because a lot of places close by mid afternoon. I think the compromise at this point is just divide society into day people and night people and just run everything 24/7. There should be enough of both for that at this point.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Uhh, what about those that consider 11AM early?

[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 months ago

1pm??? Why are you waking up so early??? Day doesn't start before 4pm.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Prefers to stay home friend reporting in 🫡

(But not really. Since I'm still home)

[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago

Fellow stay at home friend here, 🫡 I got your six. From my home.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago

At ease friendo 🫡

[–] [email protected] 29 points 5 months ago

Don’t get me started on the “first come first serve” bullshit that started this competition train wreck of a society.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (3 children)

I want to punch whoever thinks being a shifted sleeper (4am-noon or 6am-2pm in my case) is a bad thing. I had a job that loved me for taking all the late shifts that my age cohort didn't want so they could have a social life. I just didn't want to have to wake before noon. :D

If I try (and fail) to keep social hours, aka business hours, I have to contend with severe insomnia (in bed by midnight, awake til sunup), or I just don't sleep. Either is bad for me, my health, and the sanity for those around me.

Where I live, most things are finished by noon, and stores close at 4 on the weekend. Late night shopping means open til maybe 7pm on a Friday. (I miss my home city/country. Weekend hours til 6pm, late night (open til 9pm) three nights a week. Moving here was like going back in time forty years.)

Grr Argh and stuff.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 months ago

It's currently 7:30 am. I just got off work, I'm browsing a bit on my phone before I take a shower & head to bed. Perfectly normal day for me & my wife understands. I get a hundred apologies if she has to wake me up for something, and she usually doesn't get out of bed before noon.

Us night owls are a necessary part of a functional society!

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 5 months ago (4 children)

I'm the man who's going to start sleep punching motherfuckers who try to wake me up.

You people got this.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 months ago

That reminds me of my dad which is why I avoided waking him up as a child.

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[–] [email protected] 22 points 5 months ago (23 children)

I am so jealous. I am lucky if I'm able to sleep until 6 am. The dogs sometimes wake me up at 4:30 and my wife snores like a sawmill.

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 5 months ago

It is the same stuff we do between 22h-4h

[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 months ago

I either wake up super late or super early, but definitely not at a normal people time.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 months ago

I wake up when I smell bacon being cooked.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I'm not a 6am person in daily life, but on vacations waking up early just feels natural

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 months ago (1 children)

What do you mean you don't serve breakfast anymore?

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

I used to be the 1pm friend, but then a got a job that starts at 1am. Now I'm up at 5am on the weekends, and I'm still technically sleeping in.

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