this post was submitted on 09 Apr 2024
311 points (90.8% liked)

Funny

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[–] [email protected] 81 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Sacrificing me isn't sleeping though, which is what you said you wanted? I'm sensing some dishonesty, which is a red flag for me.

[–] PCChipsM922U 16 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

You sure? IDK man, you know, you could be sleeping while she slits your throat.

She seems honest IMO.

[–] Steamymoomilk 6 points 1 year ago

Nah you just picky mate,

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

DW all flags will be red after she bathes the world in your blood.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Red flag, but not a deal breaker.

[–] [email protected] 69 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 44 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

These "quirky" bios are a dime a dozen on swipe dating platforms.

Don't bother with them, they're not taking things seriously, and aren't actually interested in you, just there to stroke their ego.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

they’re not taking things seriously

No shit?

just there to stroke your ego.

… this is such an odd leap of reasoning that I have a feeling you have personal story somewhere in there

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Ahh right that definitely makes more sense, although I'm not sure I agree

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I learnt this through experience, take my word for it. They're not worth your time.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

1/10, would not be a human sacrifice again?

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Weeelll, you have personal experience from what I'm assuming is at most a couple of different "cases", plus it's not like we know whether your interpretation of what was going on reflects what happened. Not that I'm saying you're lying or necessarily even incorrect, mind you, just that taking random people at their word is often inadvisable.

Not that it makes much of a difference to me personally anyhow, it's not like I have any intention of using Tinder. Never had any good experiences with it when I did try it a few years ago

[–] PCChipsM922U 6 points 1 year ago

Yeah, like how is that strokingmy ego 🤔...

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

My sacrifice to the dark one unfulfilled, 1/10, good sex though.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

The bios says no sex.

[–] [email protected] 37 points 1 year ago (1 children)

"...sacrifice your worthless life to the dark overlord"?? If my life is worthless, then it's not really a sacrifice, is it? Please do better, "Danielle, 19".

[–] PCChipsM922U 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Wanna find out? Only 6km away 😊.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 year ago

Fix what? There's nothing to fix.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago

The no sex part is a bit disappointing, I'd expect more for my blood sacrifice.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (4 children)
[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 year ago

refreshes

5 Kilometers away

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

And decreasing…

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

TIME TO SELL THE HOUSE!

[–] PCChipsM922U 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago

Fine… Just make sure it doesn’t hurt too much.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Those fake eyebrows, for starters.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] PCChipsM922U 3 points 1 year ago

Amd as you take your last bloody breayhs, she pulls out the strapon.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Had me in the first half, not gonna lie.

[–] PCChipsM922U 1 points 1 year ago

Yeah, I was hoping for stroking maybe...

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Where is there humor here?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

The humour is in the sweet releasing embrace of death

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Ooh, she might cut herself with that edge.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I thought the point was to cut her date with it.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

And only 6 kms away!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] PCChipsM922U 1 points 1 year ago

Fairly soon... she's only 6km away.