this post was submitted on 10 Mar 2024
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No Stupid Questions

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 5 months ago (1 children)

There is no such thing as fate. Life is what it is. Make the best of it.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 5 months ago

I don't think anybody really sees themselves as a simple 'A' or 'B' in this way. Maybe I'm wrong. It just seems impossible to simplify an entire life and experience of the world as either 'blessed' or 'cursed'.

Which isn't to say I think models of human capability can't be fun.

I like to imagine it more like ability scores in D&D. Someone might have low Wisdom, but training and proficiency can still make them extremely perceptive. And in some cases, you can find ways to leverage an unusual ability when you're trying to do something, like making an intimidation check using Strength instead of Charisma. What is a weakness in one scenario can be a strength in the next.

This model is still simple enough to visualize easily, but has enough moving parts to allow for lots of different ways of being without any one way being 'good' or 'bad'. Neurodivergence might be part of the stats you roll up, but your circumstances and your choices combine to build a life experience around them that can be completely different from another person who rolled the same numbers. Likewise, different rolled stats can affect how well you handle certain situations and adventures, but this is neither a curse nor a superpower, and is true for everyone.

Models only get you so far, but humans are a social species. We need each other by our very nature. Teamwork is in our DNA. And, like DNA, teams are more adaptable when they are diverse. Everyone has something to bring to the table, neurodivergent or otherwise.

[–] can 12 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 5 months ago

I'm mildly autistic, to the point I do have to put on a "face" and try to act "normal" in social situations. I am generally quite sociable and outgoing, so I don't feel it's held me back. It's just different.

Both socially and through work I interact with a diverse range of people, and I don't think I am any more different than a British person is from an Italian. I've taken the mindset that if someone has a problem with that difference, it's merely an excuse for their bigotry that would've surfaced for a different reason either way.

On the flip side, it's been incredibly helpful in my career. I have an affinity for processes and an analytical brain, as well as the ability to disconnect from any discussion emotionally. I have always felt that this stems from my autism and it's allowed me to have business discussions about difficult topics while leaving Ego at the proverbial door.

So I would say that for me in particular, it's been a positive. Someone having a problem with me being different is just that; their problem, not mine.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 5 months ago

Neither, I am who I am and that's fine, but it's not a curse or gift.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I don't really think of myself as being a different category from anyone else in the world. However, the label of "neurodivergent," along with my specific diagnoses, help me to connect with resources and with people who often have an understanding of some of the challenges I face.

[–] Immersive_Matthew 4 points 5 months ago

I think neurotypical are the ones cursed by fate given the ridiculous group structures so many seem to blindly support.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago

None of the above? I have certain traits that society thinks are weird. That's about it. I'm neither cursed nor gifted, I just very much don't fit the definition of "normal".

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago

I'm broken. Perhaps without the autism I may have been able to get through my childhood trauma better, perhaps not.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

A, its not a gift within our societal structure and would still suck ass in other steuctures as well

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

A. but not cursed by fate. Cursed by nurture-gone-wrong although grateful that nature has extremely blessed me. But yes suffering and permanently damaged.