Her: "Aloe is a desert plant. It would love full sun the whole day"
Me: "Remember the last time you placed it outside for a few hours and it got all burned up, then you placed it in and got better after a few days? Don't put it outside. It can't handle the sunlight"
Her: ""
Now the plant is all dry and cracked up and burned and close to death.
Can you rub itself with… itself?
Masturbation is a sin, though. Do you want it to go to plant hell?
Arguably it was already there ^^
My girlfriend does the opposite. Our house is not facing a good way or with the best windows for growing plants, except for two spots. Until I finally nixed it, he kept taking plants and putting them in the middle of the house or in the back of our north-facing office. They'd start dying and I'd have to point out that plants aren't decorations, they actually need light...
That entirely depends on the plant. There are many that can live in shade. Anything that would usually live on a forest floor can survive. We have a north facing house and our living space is very green, try; devil's ivy, calathia, and ferns.
Adding ZZ plant to this list. I have one that thrives where many others have died.
We have a couple plants that survive in the shade in the office, like a Golden Pothos and a Bloodleaf, plus a bamboo in the middle of the house that has somehow stayed healthy in just a giant vase of water with nearly no light for years. A Ficus died, though, and a couple others.