ratinatrap

joined 1 year ago
MODERATOR OF
34
Not Deleting this community (self.whyihatemywife)
submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by ratinatrap to c/whyihatemywife
 

Hey everyone, I've thought about deleting this community, and it looks like I've accidentally created some sort of a Lemmy moment (even got featured in lemmy shitpost lol). I feel like deleting this community is kind of beyond me at this point. Therefore, I'm not going to delete this community, but I'm not going to use it either. I'll just lock everything up (except this one, for a while), and leave it this way forever for everybody to come take a look at what 'that guy who really, really hates his wife' did that one time.

Thanks for all the comments and advice. See you around!

[–] ratinatrap 3 points 1 year ago

Haha wtf I feel (in)famous

[–] ratinatrap 0 points 1 year ago

Thank you. I'll look at cleaning my filters and such. It's only a year old, but we often buy groceries like onions, and I have a 7yo who sometimes makes a mess, and my wife keeps the windows open even when it rains, so there's all sorts of reasons for it to get stinky.

[–] ratinatrap 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm going to delete some comments/posts and lock the others while I consider what I want to do with this community. Thanks for all your advice.

[–] ratinatrap 3 points 1 year ago

Yeah that's my biggest concern.

[–] ratinatrap 4 points 1 year ago
[–] ratinatrap 2 points 1 year ago

I've started listening to your recommendation on eggshells, and it's so far bang on. I'm hoping to hear some solutions down the line. Thank you for that book.

[–] ratinatrap 3 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Thanks for the advice. I can't find a way to make it private, but I've made the community mod only. I'm still thinking over whether to delete this community or lock it and keep using it like a journal. May be I'll try your suggestion for a few days and see how that works.

[–] ratinatrap 8 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I don’t know where you get that I hate women. I hate this one person who is making my life miserable. Would you say the same thing if I’m a woman and say I hate my husband because he does all these things?

[–] ratinatrap 2 points 1 year ago

Thanks, and no problem. I’m sort of making fun of myself, and I do deserve criticism for the way I framed some of the posts.

45
Deleting this community (self.whyihatemywife)
 

Hey everyone, I created this community as some sort of an online journal to vent out my frustrations. I always expected somebody to stumble upon this down the line, but didn't expect it to get such an attention so quickly. As some people pointed out, this community has all the hallmarks of becoming a misogynistic cesspool, which was not my intention. I am at as much fault in this one for ignoring all the red flags during courtship, and for not separating after the marriage when there was still time to do so. All this to say, I'll be closing this community.

I still think some aspects of this community are still useful. I was finally able to put my thoughts into words, and seeing people advise me made me feel like I was not alone, and that there is still hope. This could be a different community under different name. If somebody wants to create /c/badrelationships to vent/rant/seek support/validation for any bad relationships in our life, I would be happy to subscribe.

Thanks for reading this. I'll delete the community by the end of the day.

[–] ratinatrap 3 points 1 year ago

Yeah I think I’ll just delete this community. Didn’t really expect this.

[–] ratinatrap 1 points 1 year ago

You look at my posts and you know I’m doing it for free. Nothing against her brother. He’s a great guy and got dealt a lot of bad cards in life. I’m a python programmer.

[–] ratinatrap 4 points 1 year ago

Back then I did ignore some red flags. One of the things she said was that she has concentric circles of people, and she was only totally herself and act freely with people in her innermost circle. Then after the marriage when she started being this way, her justification was that she didn’t have to filter herself with me because I was her innermost circle.

 

I can't remember the last time I've seen her vomit. She's also fine keeping all windows rolled up and turn on ac/heater when she feels hot/cold

 

After two weeks, the foot healed itself. Looking forward to the next time it happens again.

 

Our car constantly smells, and I'm ashamed to give a ride to anybody. All the usual air fresheners are non-starters because they would kill you or something. You are allowed to use essential oils, but she doesn't like the smell of most of them, and the one she approved of (rose essential) smells like decayed organic matter in a hot car.

 

Her: "Aloe is a desert plant. It would love full sun the whole day"

Me: "Remember the last time you placed it outside for a few hours and it got all burned up, then you placed it in and got better after a few days? Don't put it outside. It can't handle the sunlight"

Her: ""

Now the plant is all dry and cracked up and burned and close to death.

 

She is concerned that this 3400 sqft house isn't going to have enough oxygen to sustain the three of us. Keeping the doors/windows closed with AC on is going to give us recycled air, which is very bad for you. The only time she'll ever do that is if she feels very hot. Same thing when driving. Even if you turn on AC, she'll have her window cracked open to let in that sweet hot air to feel that fresh air. Doesn't matter you press the button to let in outside air. She doesn't believe in them. She only believes in fresh air straight out the window.

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