Thought title was a setup to joke. Man crazy. Can it eat gummy bears?
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Who's gonna stop it?
The bears digestive track. I went to Alaska for a week a while back and we actually learned about how the local bears eat. Eventually a bear's canines (or whatever teeth they use for meat tearing) will wear down to stubs making it impossible for them to eat meat. When this happens they will start to exclusively eat plant matter. Unfortunately this is also what ends up killing them. A young bear typically eats plant matter to slow down their digestive track for the winter. But in the case of an older bear they eat so much that their digestion literally backs up until it kills them
I thought this was c/dadjokes too
Me too!
This is world news but when I steal a bag of sour patch kids it's just a violation of my parole or w/e
"world news"
Nothing but this bear theft happened today. It was the only thing of note in the entire world.
Didn't some TV station one broadcast that fuck all happened that day, anywhere?
Cannibalism
Cute story until you realize the bear will be euthanized
Haribo has a posse
Didn't "euthanasia" apply to "individuals getting help to fulfill their death wish"? I don't think the bear wants to die, if anything it will get murdered, as in "premeditated taking of a life, against the target's wishes".
How do you know the bear's wishes? Did you ask him?
Suicide by ~~cop~~ vet, you say? That bear needs counseling!
You don't take on a pack of wild gummy bears and come out alive. That bear had a death wish, sure as shootin.
No?
put (a living being, especially a dog or cat) to death humanely.
"Humanely" implies a reason that isn't just because it behaved not how you wanted it. That's called "sacrificing" or at best "killing", like when you want to eat steak but the cow insists on breathing.
I don't want the bear to die. But that doesn't change that the word doesn't imply consent.
The word literally means "good death", meaning for a good reason. Consent is one such reason, terminal illness is another, stealing gummy bears... is not.
Amazing
A gas station bar?
Free shooter with 10 gal fill up?
Bear probably had mad munchies. Don't judge lol