ITT we ask the autistic to self identify
this post was submitted on 29 May 2025
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if you're in a relationship you can just hug instead of small talk
The real answer is it doesn't matter. I feel like I have free will hence I have free will for all meaningful intents and purposes.
Neither argument can be proven and even if it's an illusion, it's strong enough to make the truth irrelevant.
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Id rather discuss that than what someone did last weekend tbh.
That's the point of this post. That's fun for me too. But if you're living with someone, you've found out what their opinion on free will and almost every other deep conversation you could have with them in the first few years. How will it look 15 years later? Either you rehash the same conversation about free will multiple times a day or you wander around the same house in abject silence for months until one of you can think of a good continuation of that 20 year long "what is the meaning of life?" conversation you've been having. Instead just learn to small talk, life is long and it's nice to have the affirmation that a loved one still pays attention to and cares about your day to day.
This seems more like extroverts' misconceptions of how introverts are, rather than an actual issue to me. I don't tend to seek out relationships with highly extroverted people who can't stand the idea of a moment where nobody is saying something, regardless of how inane that thing happens to be. At present, my companion and I have known each other for pushing 15 years, and we're just comfortable being quiet around each other, unless one of us actually has something to say. If one of us actually has something they want to communicate about their day, or some other typical topic for small talk, we're more than capable of talking each others' ears off, we just don't feel any need to run through conversations like:
"How was your day?"
"Good, yours?"
"Also acceptable."
on a regular basis, unless we actually have something we wanted to discuss.
It's also not as though we don't have any hobbies or interests. We've got plenty of shared ones, and enjoy discussing them and planning out future activities, we just tend to do it either solo or together, but without involving large groups. Even for those we don't share, we enjoy discussing them with each other to a certain extent.
There's a huge difference between disliking pointless, socially expected chatter to fill dead air, and having some sort of social anxiety that leaves you unable to sustain regular conversations with others in your life. People who are not introverted just seem to assume that we either wish we could do it, but have some sort of condition that prevents us from being able to do so without it causing us problems, or that we just never learned how to do it properly, and would enjoy it for some reason if they just kept trying to get us to do it more and practice. I'm sure there are people that would apply to, but it's not universal, and many of us would just like to be left in peace, unless you actually have something to say. Sometimes, we even meet others like ourselves, and enjoy our peace together, without the pointless talk that we both know neither is really interested in.
Relevant meme:
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Why does the image look like AI generated? How the letters are so fucked up?
Took a picture of their monitor with a phone camera that uses AI image enhancement
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Small talk != big talk
I would even say: Big talk > small talk
My partner and I both understand that free will doesn't exist but it's better for everyone if we pretend it does. And yes, a lot of our conversations are a bit like that.
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Hi honey did you see today’s shitposts memes?
These kinds of philosophical questions are easily defeated by asking "does it matter though?"
it may not matter at all, but we're here, somehow, made of sentient flesh, kept on a giant rock hurling through space, spinning around an enormous buring ball of fire. it's all bizarre and none of us knows what is going on, so why not take some time out of the lives we live as statistical abnormalities, and just ponder on the whys and hows and whats of the things around us, and our own minds
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I guess, if they answer "No" or "Your simple rebuttal has made me realize the problem of free will is nbd actually".
But if they say "Yes. It does matter." Then suddenly it isn't defeated and you'd need to provide a compelling argument for it not mattering, which would make for good conversation.
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Spouse and I ponder the mysteries of life and the universe while we’re cuddling.
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Silence isn't a crime you know...it's actually pretty great.
Hey baby I brought home some dinner-
“Husband. Thy presence brings thoughts of philosophical questions.”
Alright. I’m just gonna eat this burrito though.
Alright. I’m just gonna eat this burrito though.
Is that because you are choosing to, or because of destiny?
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got a neighbor can't control his motor mouth. last time he came to my door i said 'what the fuck do you want' and closed/locked the door. not too bright. he yelled through the door, 'I only want to talk'. hahaha fuck off
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Pretty much yeah.
There is nothing wrong with silence, also my partner and I always have something to talk about that isn't small talk. We have been together for 22 yrs. We have a lifetimes worth of shared experiences to converse about.
I mean You can hate small talk with strangers and co workers but still enjoy small talk with your partner
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how do people who like small talk plan on being in sustained meaningful relationships what are you gonna do "hi honey nice weather we're having huh?"
my plan is to be too busy kissing my partner at all times to say anything
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