this post was submitted on 26 Aug 2023
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Unpopular Opinion

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It feels like being an optimist in this world must be absolutely soul crushing.

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[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It’s fine as long as it doesn’t become a self fulfilling prophecy. If you think an endeavour will fail anyway you won’t try as hard because why bother

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's the real problem with pessimism. It usually does become a self-fulfilling prophecy, leading to worse outcomes for pessimists.

But yes, also less disappointment. So if you can't handle disappointment, then pessimism is the locally optimal strategy.

But the better strategy is to learn how to emotionally handle disappointment. Then you can become a realist or even an optimist and just take the disappointments along the way.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Arguably both 'extremes' can become an excuse for inaction, pessimists may think "why even try if it probably won't help" while optimists may think "it'll resolve itself / look at the bright side." Similarly, both can be strategies for coping with disappointment. And can become a tiny bit delusional.

But at least optimists live in blissful ignorance lol. I think people underestimate an optimist's ability to see problems as just solutions waiting to happen.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Time almost always proves you correct

This is a very pessimistic outlook, well done on being internally consistent.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You would rather be smug than happy?

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)

in my case i don't know how to act happy like other people do I've always been pretty sad and that made me pessimistic/smug. i don't know how people get excited or happy about stuff usually.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago

You sound like you could use therapy more

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago

Pessimism is boring, and it does not inspire action. It smothers it. Optimism gives you a reason to try

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago

Honey I think this is called depression

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I very much believe in this philosophy

And, also, very much believe this makes us assholes. Welcome to the family

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

When you know nothing matters, the universe is yours.

And yeah, that makes you an asshole to the universe, agreed fam.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If your pleasantly surprised are you really a pessimist?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

If you're pleasantly surprised, you have to be a pessimist. An optimist will expect things to be positive, so the positivity can't be surprising.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

The real trick is not having expectations at all!

If things go bad? So what, shit happens.

If they go well? Cool, lucky.

Just enjoy the moments, and give thought to issues only as they arise.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (2 children)

My life has given me the exact opposite experience. Time almost always proves me correct to be optimistic, it just sometimes takes a longer time. So you have to be both optimistic and patient. The pessimist may be right in the short term, but optimism is.correct.given enough time.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

This has been my experience as well.

I consider myself a pragmatic optimist. I assume the best intentions in those around me, give forgiveness for human error and tendencies, and when someone gives me cause to do so I pragmatically adjust my expectations of them and their actions.

I also assume that, as long as I am trying to do the next right thing in each situation I find myself in, most of those situations will resolve in a positive outcome. Even if others involved are not committed to the same path.

I found much more success and happiness with this philosophy or approach to life.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Same here. I go about life with a positive outlook and because of that, see negative things as minor hickups among all the positive things that reinforce my optimism

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

I think giving into either of them too much has drawbacks. The criticisms I have of optimism are just as relevant to pessimism. Plus our perception of things can be influenced by pre-existing cognitive biases.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Pessimism, realism. They are the same word for some of us.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Pretty selfish outlook, wouldn't you say?

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Because it's all for you. You're protecting yourself from disappointment.

Time almost always proves you correct, and very occasionally, you're pleasantly surprised!

But what about everyone else around you that you care about? Being pessimistic tends to wear on them and simply for personal gain.

I'd rather be wrong than unpleasant.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'd rather be correct than happy is literally my core philosophy.

I have great disdain for the concept of ignorance is bliss.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I'm not advocating for ignorance. We should still be as informed as we can be. Optimism and pessimism show up when there are unknowns.

It's ultimately best to be correct and happy, which is achievable, just not if you're pessimistic.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Yeah. It might save you alright. But it should be in moderation, or sometimes kept to oneself. Too much pessimism can drive away friends.

That is, unless all your friends are also ultra pessimists, then you'll just have to one up each other in a pessimist pissing contest.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I get grief about being a pessimist (primarily from, yes, optimists), but both pessimism and optimism are strategies for coping with life's uncertainties. One works better for some, the other works better for others.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I hate upvoting this because I vehemently disagree. Well done sir

[–] [email protected] 2 points 11 months ago

I think there is a difference between not having expectations and borrowing trouble. If you literally look for everything to go wrong, it will, and focusing on the negative makes you find it everywhere and not see the positive.

My view is that I am exceptionally lucky to be alive and physically embodied. On top of that I am not even in constant pain. Can see and hear and feel, can taste and read and dance. I feel true gratitude for being able to experience anything at all, to have a body and a mind. I'm not sure it's optimistic at all, but I am happy.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

As nofx told me...

Don't expect the best, you won't disappointed when you take a bite and watch the worm crawl back inside.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 11 months ago

Upvoted as I think that this is genuinely unpopular.

...pessimism, optimism, I don't really think that it matters. It's just fee fees.

Instead what matters is the situation and your actions - analyse the situation; predict the best, worst, and most likely outcomes; establish a course of action; act on it.