I call them "tissues." Calling all tissue Kleenex is like my mom calling all video games Nintendo.
this post was submitted on 16 Apr 2025
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FWIW, I just learned that escalator and kerosene started as trademarked brand names.
So did Frisbee
Xerox machine
Cellophane
Dumpster
insisting on calling all tissues kleenex is how the company loses the rights to the name
My parents do say kleenices, but they're massive nerds. And linguists. Dad has bad allergies so "Did you take the kleenices out of your pockets?" was a common laundry time question. They also pluralized pizza as "pizzot".
Fun fact! Pizza is already plural. The singular is a piz, which is where we get the English word “piece”, because pizza come pre-portioned. The word “peace” also comes from the same derivation, because it is impossible to go to war while enjoying a piz of pizza.
/s
Kleenex is the name of the brand, not the tissues
Brands are nouns and can (and are) thus genericized.
Kleenpodes!
Yes, I know its unrelated. I'm just trying to force in the whole octopi problem.
According to the internet the -ex to -ices is a dead suffix for specifically latin borrowed words
is a dead suffix
sure, if you go with that attitude!
What if the singular of Kleenex was a Kleenek.
Gah you fuggin beat me to it!
Kleeni (long i)
I think that would be the plural of Kleenus.
[kliːniː]
Furthermore, it should be pronounced like it was a Greek philosopher.
Κληνίσης
Kleenussies
Obviously pronounces "Clean-eh-keys" right?
As a crazy person that took 5 semesters of Latin, absolutely, but it's a battle in which I've admitted defeat, much like "as per."
If English made any sense, "matrices" would be the normal plural and pronounced with the italianized soft c. But then "indexes" is over there being irksome.
I think the correct plural here is simpler: a zero plural, i.e Kleenex. Probably because we just elide the entire word "tissues."
Kleeneges.
Tap for spoiler
rex -> reges
spoiler
regex → regeges?
Tap for spoiler
Lateges, googolpleges, apeges, indeges, Wesseges and Susseges, the two seges. Latin is super easy.
You must struggle with nouns like 'deer' and 'mail'.
I thought Kleenex was the plural. I use one Kleeni at a time.
What should the plural of Lego be?
Leggos
My eggos
Lesgo?
What other word follows this?
index -> indices matrix -> matrices codex -> codices appendix -> appendices
Ah, I forgot about index and didn't know about codices.
I'll continue to use the plural "tissues", though! Lol
It's funny to me to see someone simultaneously prescriptively linguistic enough to use a Latin pluralization but not pedantic enough to use the proper non-genericized term for tissues, haha
In my broken mind, it has been for years!