I'm not into other girls, but I've got lesbian friends who are great! π
this post was submitted on 18 Mar 2025
154 points (97.0% liked)
Ask Lemmy
30178 readers
1517 users here now
A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions
Rules: (interactive)
1) Be nice and; have fun
Doxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them
2) All posts must end with a '?'
This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?
3) No spam
Please do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.
4) NSFW is okay, within reason
Just remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either [email protected] or [email protected].
NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].
5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions.
If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email [email protected]. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.
6) No US Politics.
Please don't post about current US Politics. If you need to do this, try [email protected] or [email protected]
Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.
Partnered Communities:
Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
I'm a cishet dude and all but one of my friends are some combination of gay, bi, or trans
I'm not into guys but I've got pan/bi/het friends who are great! π
I have always been a liberal leftist but I actually really enjoy being around old school, fiscally conservative Republicans, when they aren't talking about politics. They tend to be softies on the inside - they value strength and tradition and care deeply for their communities and families; often more directly demonstrating that care than liberals tend to. They also don't accept the victim mentality and tend to shoot straight with their words, and can be hilariously harsh. They are responsible and tend to follow through with their commitments.
The problem is, I can't really stand being around them because they can't help themselves bringing up the dumbest opinions of all time and they typically don't like digging into fact based thinking.
Same now as 20 years ago, when they would say shit like, "pretty cold out today - don't seem like global warming to me! Hahaha" etc etc
TIL 20 years ago is 2000... not the 60s... fml
Something about the horseshoe effect I'm sure. I'm the same way, I make the best of friends with conservative assholes. They care about family, water is thicker than blood, blah blah blah. It's just the policies they vote for that I hate, which is also why I love just chatting about them. Gives me an opportunity to "know thy enemy" and have a chance to change their mind
That's all well and good, until they vote for literal fascists who believe trans people shouldn't exist.
At some point you need to draw a line. And even if they don't say that shit out loud, or they pretend to disagree, they still vote for it and most of them will refuse to ever admit they were wrong for that.
load more comments
(1 replies)
load more comments
(7 replies)
I am not a fan of the hardcore heavy/death metal music itself; but the metalheads are awesome people. The more unintelligible and scary/evil sounding the music, the nicer the crowd. It's weird and cool and funny.
load more comments
(6 replies)
For me it's Metal music. It's just absolutely not my genre but an overwhelming amount of metalheads I met were just the nicest, most wholesome and fun people all around.
We trash and bash in the mosh pitts, and get out our aggression. But if someone falls, you YANK them up. Many times I've fallen, and then suddenly felt myself lifted high into the air by the hand of god. Then I can see who lifted me, and it turns out it wasn't god. It was a long haired, bearded, tattood muscleman. Which makes sense. I'm like 300lbs. If you're suddenly yanking me up effortlessly, you're a big muscle man. And then there's other times I see women fall. I yank them up. I'm doing the right thing, I KNOW I'm doing the right thing, but the whole time I'm just like "Sorry sorry sorry sorry." because you don't aim where you grab. You grab and yank up, by whatever you can. You don't want the pitt to come her way and stomp her head, not knowing she exists down there. So yank, but also "Sorry sorry sorry sorry". I've yet to have any women mad at me for doing it, they get it, but MAN it feels weird just grabbing a woman like that.
Pushing, shoving, looks like a massive fist fight but it's all love. We're trusting them with our life. They're trusting us with theirs. We all get super violent, and have a good time. Then the show lets out, and we're like "Oh, you wanna go get some late night eats? Anyone know a good gyro spot?", and we're just friendly for the rest of the day. We're like the Canadians of music genres. Violent when we play, and friendly the rest of the time.
load more comments
(1 replies)
There is research and papers showing that heavy music in general can actually be therapeutic and make someone calmer, rather than the perceived opposite effect. It can be a great outlet. I listen to metal, heavy music, all the time but when I have used it as a coping mechanism, i.e. an outlet for stress, it has definitely allowed me to release such tension. Not only that, but singing/screaming to vocals along to the music surely does release all of energy, and while there are outsiders who might perceive the music as 'angry' the incorrect connection they're making is that anger is an energetic emotion, as in unreleased energy/tension. Metal isn't angry music, it is energetic. That is why it makes such good workout music. It stimulates and satisfies that part of our lives, letting us be some of the 'nicest, most wholesome and fun people all around'.
load more comments
(3 replies)
Metal Heads will absolutely be your best friends in time of need. Need help moving a body, no questions asked? Call your metal friend.
load more comments
(1 replies)
Furries are cool people ~~and the backbone of modern society~~
This. To be clear I have absolutely no problem with furries existing and I believe anything less than letting y'all be would be tantamount to treason.
But God damn I just cannot understand it. I don't get it. And it weirds me out.
Like I said, I would actually fight to defend your right to wear your fur suit out in public. But I'm also going to make fun of you because man it's just weird.
Although I did have a coworker (I work in IT so this isn't actually that surprising) who was a furry and he tried to meow at me one time when I called his name. Don't do that. That was weird. Just tell me what you did to fix the computer man.
Although I did have a coworker (I work in IT so this isn't actually that surprising) who was a furry and he tried to meow at me one time when I called his name. Don't do that. That was weird. Just tell me what you did to fix the computer man.
He did. What you don't understand is that meowing at the problem is often the solution. If meowing doesn't work, try barking.
load more comments
(3 replies)
Rugby players.
I don't care for sports so much, but a ton of my friends play rugby. Several of my exes play rugby. I've got cousins who play rugby. I live in the States and, while rugby is popular, it's no where near the levels of enthusiasm where like 90% of the people a person hangs out with plays it (and you not also play or have any real interest in it). Mostly to support people I was dating, I've been to like ten games in my life and, while I understand how the game is played, I'm just completely uninterested in sports and following sports as a hobby or interest. I don't know why, but rugby people love me and I love them.
Books. I'm dyslexic as fuck but heavy readers are mostly chill people.
Did you ever get into audio books? It's nice to have someone else read to you at bedtime or during a commute.
load more comments
(3 replies)
Grand strategy games aren't for me, but I love reading the insane stories from CKII and Dwarf Fortress.
CK2 and DF aren't grand strategy games, they're story generators.
I agree with you about dwarf fortress, but crusader kings is like the definition of the Grand strategy genre, while simultaneously encouraging you to create a story why half of your line is inbred worse than Charles II of Spain.
Sex. Neurodivergent/nerd social circles often have a lot of kink/BDSM and otherwise sex positive people, so my friends group is pretty open about sex.
Iβm on the asexual spectrum and would rather forget that sex is a thing, but I love my friends and as long as everyone is consenting and safe, Iβm happy for them. I sometimes get awkward when sex convos happen around me, but hey, I get awkward with many other convos too.
I'm a part of the wrong nerd circles. Most of mine consist of one token furry, a couple lbgtqia+'s, an aging jock who clearly hasn't grown up since highschool(but they were pretty in highschool as well) and a weirdly successful dude who you would never guess it. I don't think any of them talked about sex with one another.
load more comments
(1 replies)
One thatβs less relevant now, but throughout my life has been relevant: Juggalos.
I was a big metalhead in school, and i had a bunch of juggalo friends. I liked a couple of their songs well enough, but I found the βcultureβ grating. Still, those mothafuckas were the most accepting and tolerant people I knew. Tolerant of anyoneβs way of life, except they fucking hated bigots. In the 90s, being accepting of queer peeps really wasnβt in vogue (to put it lightly) but juggalos welcomed queer peeps as friends with open arms.
load more comments
(3 replies)
Boardgaming. I play an occasional boardgame with my friends, but I'm not searching youtube clips for strategies, importing first-print Euro games in the original German and printing English-language stickers for the boards, or watching Essen livestreams every year.
I fell out of D&D around 4th ed, and didn't really care enough to get "competitive" in something like settlers of Catan. But if someone brings out something fun and simple like sorry, or candy land and I am so down!
Smokers. They have decades of being able to strike up an angry conversation in a street with an absolute stranger, whilst never letting it escalate, because, fuckit, brotherhood of smokers.
Plus a healthy appreciation of nature. Sure you can smoke and look at your phone, but you still have to be outside and that means glancing up from time to time to look at the scenery, the night sky, to wave at your neighbours, etc.
Good people smokers, filthy habit.
(Vapers dont count, cos you can't really share a vape concurrently. Also a lot of them take pride in their devices which I find weird. Real smokers have a decent sense of self-hatred at their habit)
Not sure what kind of smokers you meet. The ones I have to deal with blow cancer in my face right next to children, get aggressive when I ask them not to, spit on the floor every 5s, throw their still lit cigs into trash bins or into nature and cant stop coughing on the train.
load more comments
(3 replies)
load more comments
(8 replies)
I FUCKING HATE ketchup. I can't tolerate the taste or the texture. But I recognize that people that love ketchup are not evil, just misguided.
load more comments
(1 replies)
view more: next βΊ