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submitted 11 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[-] [email protected] 188 points 11 months ago

What a horrible day to have genitals.

[-] [email protected] 130 points 11 months ago

Why did I learn how to read?

[-] [email protected] 42 points 11 months ago

Society forced you. Time to burn it all down.

[-] [email protected] 12 points 11 months ago

I knew I was right to blame society for everything!

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[-] [email protected] 93 points 11 months ago

Ok I guess we both have it bad

[-] [email protected] 27 points 11 months ago

I’ve had both happen, yeah both suck

[-] [email protected] 22 points 11 months ago
[-] [email protected] 40 points 11 months ago

Life's wild, my friend

[-] [email protected] 20 points 11 months ago

Some of us go from having one set of bits to having a different set of bits.

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[-] [email protected] 15 points 11 months ago

A fart is nowhere near as bad as the inside of a dirty toilet 😅

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[-] [email protected] 79 points 11 months ago

As a pussy haver. What the fuck

[-] [email protected] 35 points 11 months ago

Today we encounter the "pussy havers" and the "pussy have nots" learning side by side! Spectacular!

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[-] [email protected] 63 points 11 months ago

I was helping my daughter (3) pee. Pee came out of 3 places at once at one point, then 2.

I'll keep my ding dong, thanks.

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[-] [email protected] 54 points 11 months ago
[-] [email protected] 21 points 11 months ago
[-] [email protected] 51 points 11 months ago

If only my dick was big enough to touch the inside of the bowl

[-] [email protected] 23 points 11 months ago

You don't want it to be, the cold touch of a toilet bowl specially a dirty public restroom gives me chills

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[-] [email protected] 48 points 11 months ago

Relax guys. We all know girls don't fart.

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[-] [email protected] 46 points 11 months ago

im with everyone here. what the fuck

[-] [email protected] 45 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

At least we can all relate to water splashes.

[-] [email protected] 37 points 11 months ago

Oh man I had diarrhea in a porta-potty a couple weeks ago and got some splash back. I was not a happy camper.

[-] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago

I call bullshit. No one survives the blue touch.

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[-] [email protected] 21 points 11 months ago
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[-] [email protected] 37 points 11 months ago
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[-] [email protected] 34 points 11 months ago

What the fuck

[-] [email protected] 33 points 11 months ago

I'm a guy and I've had those farts that escape up between your leg and balls and pop out the top

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[-] [email protected] 22 points 11 months ago

The requeefining.

[-] [email protected] 21 points 11 months ago

When I shit my dick touch the water

[-] [email protected] 40 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

You're not supposed to shit in the urinals, my dude.

[-] [email protected] 18 points 11 months ago

Then why are they butt-level???

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[-] [email protected] 19 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

My friend told me of the horror of your menstrual cup falling into a public toilet. I'd take licking the bowl over that shit any day of the week.

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[-] [email protected] 18 points 11 months ago

Alright how many of you in here trying to make your dick fart right now?

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[-] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago

Worse when it touches the water though.

[-] [email protected] 37 points 11 months ago

Just wrap it around your thigh, problem solved

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[-] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago

I'd rather re-fart my own fart, than have my dick dip into a public toilet again.

One is slightly, uncomfortable, maybe? The other opens the mind to all the diseases that could potentially infect your dick in a public toilet. Unlikely? Sure. Possible? In some cases, with some diseases, yes - however slim.

[-] [email protected] 16 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

(cis)Women also will never know the pain of sitting on their own balls.

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[-] [email protected] 16 points 11 months ago

Fat ass man here, can fart in 3 voices at the same time, I conserve one in the under ass, one in the upper ass and let them out the same time. You should've seen the admiring faces from the two cops in the front of the car. I even did it with cuffs. They totally wanted autographs.

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[-] [email protected] 15 points 11 months ago

weirdly accurate

[-] [email protected] 13 points 11 months ago

So if you go down on a girl after she does this does that mean you're eating shit particles?

[-] [email protected] 23 points 11 months ago

I mean, you're always probably going to a little bit, no big deal, but they're so close together that it just happens

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[-] [email protected] 13 points 11 months ago

Had both.

Don't recommend either.

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[-] [email protected] 13 points 11 months ago

Can some woman confirm this is legit? Seems very hard to believe

[-] [email protected] 23 points 11 months ago

It is... And honestly, I can't tell which one is worse. I will say, the first time it happened, I was terrified, thought something was wrong with me

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[-] [email protected] 13 points 11 months ago

I bet it is great requeef when it comes out!

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this post was submitted on 19 Aug 2023
1415 points (97.0% liked)

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