this post was submitted on 10 Jan 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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top 40 comments
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[–] [email protected] 64 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

You sure he wasn't actually making lembas bread?

[–] [email protected] 57 points 1 week ago (3 children)

ProTip: before you vacuum seal any bread, put it in the freezer until it's solid and then pull it back out to vacuum seal.

[–] CidVicious 21 points 1 week ago (1 children)

And even after this you might want to manually stop the sealer before it puts too much pressure on. Bread is surprisingly squishy because it's mostly air.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

100% those vac seals are crazy. You want to remove as much air from it so you can minimize freezer burn.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

If you warm it up after sealing you're freeze drying it

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 week ago

A toaster for a few minutes will bring your bread back from the day you froze it.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 week ago (1 children)

You don't keep croissants. You eat half on the way home from the bakery, and the rest as soon as you're home.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Look at Mr Frenchman over here buying bread at the bakers! I exclusively buy my croissants in those scary tubes that pop when you open them.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Those aren't croissants. Those are crescents.

I was going to make a joke, spelling it the same way and pronouncing it differently, but I'm pretty sure the Pillsbury tubes are even called crescents on the package

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago

Not in my country they ain't

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 60 points 1 week ago (3 children)

You and OP should keep in mind for all of our sakes that France is a nuclear-armed state.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Seriously, even putting a croissant in a plastic bag warrants a first strike.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

puts ketchup on a croissant without breaking eye contact

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Degenerates like you belong on a cross

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago

But first they'll have to be made into an aunt so they become a crossed aunt

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 week ago

Then dips it in soy sauce

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

Ok, take a nap, THEN FIRE ZE MISSLES!

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 week ago

I'll enjoy my croissanwiches and cronuts in the apocalypse.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I wonder if it's like croissant jerky...sounds awesome tbh

[–] Object 9 points 1 week ago

Wouldn't that be a biscuit?

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

A little bit more pressure and you create diamonds...

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] mindbleach 1 points 1 week ago
[–] peetabix 4 points 1 week ago

Thought it was beef jerky

[–] mindbleach 1 points 1 week ago