this post was submitted on 14 Aug 2023
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News

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Remember when we all thought how cute it was that that one otter was stealing surf boards? They’re done being cute, now.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

different otters. entirely different species.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Bruh. Don't fall for the propaganda.

This is just the beginning. I'm getting out while I still can.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I for one welcome our new floating fuzzy overlords…

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Otters are only cute to people that don’t know anything about otters.

They’re massive rapists.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If you look at the animal kingdom, you'll see that rape is kind of the norm.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

And yet, not a particularly great legal defence.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Yeah, but they hold hands when they sleep and break clams on their tummies!!!

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Just bite back, your teeth are bigger and your jaws are stronger! You are an animal, act like one!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Beat it into a pulp. Then have sex with its corpse. Not for pleasure but to send a message to its kind.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I don't have any messages I need to send that badly.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That’s what otters do. If you want to send a message you have to speak their language.

Really though, otters are some of the most viscous little critters. They will rape other animals to death. Then rape their corpses.

Otters are fucked up.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

And yet so cute.

[–] Hanabie 8 points 1 year ago

Also, your saliva is more infectious.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Mustalids routinely win against larger prey. Stout kill full size rabbits and a wolverine has been recorded to have killed a polar bear. Don't give the otter an excuse.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Otters are apex predators simply because they have the ability of tactical genius working in strike group squads. If you've ever seen the videos of them taking down and drowning crocodiles, then you know. They are not omg adorbs so cute!! They can and will destroy you. Walking navy seal copypastas.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Zootopia taught me that (Emmett) Otter(ton) is apex predator that can go...Savage.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (2 children)

God damn I didn't know otters were 1.2 meters long, that's a big fuckin' marmot dude

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Giant otters in the Amazon can get to be 2 meters long.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

There's a video on YouTube where otters were housed with monkeys, the monkeys trolled the shit out of the otters for the Lulz... Eventually the otters all sort of snapped, together, grabbed one and absolutely mauled the shit out of it.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

Of all the things to get attacked by in Montana. Not a bear, not a mountain lion, or a wolf, or a moose. Nope, a fucking otter is the thing that gets you. Jesus.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

That otter make her think twice.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

By the grace of god you made it out of the river? By the grace of god? You dumb shitheel an otter bit your fuckin' ear off. If anything your stupid ass got smote.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

Alright, Florida Man, you're up.

Call, Raise, or Fold?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

Otters are mean

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Someone go tell Asst. Mayor Bellweather that she was right! The otters have gone savage!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

"... And in otter news!"

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Could you please edit the post to have the NSFW tag checked. Thank you (:

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

That Otter leave a mark!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

It ... it bit part of her ear off!!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Now we all know that otters fuck and specifically with YOU.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

That otter leave a mark!