this post was submitted on 18 Jan 2024
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Funny

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[–] [email protected] 27 points 9 months ago (1 children)

"Find your animal abuser match for free."

[–] [email protected] 26 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Fuck that psycho Charlotte. We know you want to. Find her on match.com

[–] VicksVaporBBQrub 11 points 9 months ago

Watch Charlotte's video of her riding bengal tigers to scare millions of water buffalo over a cliff in Africa. Charlotte puts the "harm" in eHarmony. Find Charlotte on eHarmony.com today!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

Phew, dodged a bullet here.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (4 children)

If this is America, and it was a House Sparrow, bastard had it coming. Awful invasive species, and it's one of, I believe, two ~~animals~~ birds which is always legal to kill here. Fuck sparrows. I'd swipe right.

Edit thanks to extra info from replies.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 months ago

There are Charlottes in your area that would like to meet

[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Nah, there are more. Wild hogs, Burmese pythons, lion fish, etc.

Iirc killing Burmese pythons is legally required in Florida.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

Maybe I was thinking of just birds, since the other one in my head is the European Starling, which is awful for pretty much the same reasons as Sparrows.

Thanks for the extra info!

[–] sbv 1 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Legally required? Like you see a Burmese python and you have to kill it?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

I was a bit off, but if you catch one you have to kill it then and there (unless you have a permit to take them to an off-site location). Some venomous reptile owners buy/catch them for food, though.

My wife watches a channel of a wildlife conservationist in Florida (he's the guy who just yoinks animals off trees and such), and every video he catches a ridiculous amount of them.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 9 months ago

Fuck sparrows. I’d swipe right.

With a tennis racquet?

[–] thecrotch 2 points 9 months ago

Judging by "tube" I'd say this is from Britain.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 9 months ago

First she came for the sparrows, and I did not speak out because I am not a sparrow.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 9 months ago

Abort mission ! Abort mission ! I repeat - abort mission !!

[–] fibojoly 5 points 9 months ago

For a moment, I wondered if it was an expression like hitting an eagle in golf or something.
But of course not.

[–] sugar_in_your_tea 4 points 9 months ago

So do I need to bring my own, or will she provide the racquets on our first date?