What the fuck FDA
Memes
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Haven't they killed an alarming amount if animals trying to get this thing to work?
Yes. Many of the chimps in the animal trials died horribly excruciating deaths, and Neuralink tried to bury the studies.
What. I still rember the article about the Monkeys Musk butchered with his Microchips! This was terrifying and disgusting and now he is allowed to do this to humans?! WTF.
Regulatory capture at work. If you're the second-richest man in the world and a darling of the far right to boot, they'll let you do pretty much whatever you want.
And when you’re a star they let you do it. You can do anything.
Grab them by the brain. You can do anything.
All I’m seeing is ads streamed directly to the brain with no way but one to stop it, assuming that instinct doesn’t get neurologically suppressed.
Why put an ad while they can directly manipulate your hormones/enzymes?
You’re just gonna give them ideas like that?!
Ah fuck. You didn’t tell them anything they didn’t already consider. Fuck, I’m slow.
Fuck, I’m slow.
You should drink Monster™ Super Ultra!
"Neuralink Premium halves the number of ads in your dreams for only $8 a month!"
Futurama Season 1: Episode 6. Fry gets ads in dreams.
Futurama Splash Screen with: "Any Resemblance to Actual Future is Purely Coincidental" written as gag.
Get ready for mental health DLC patches or micro transactions.
Subscription services*
"Your subscription to arm control has expired. Please wiggle your eyebrows in a lewdly suggestive manner to pay subscription fee plus $69 lateness surcharge and a $420 because we can addendum"
Unskippable ads directly to your brainhole
Holes in the brain are something intelligent people generally try to avoid.
True, which is one of the many reasons why intelligent people will generally try to avoid having The Monkey Killer installed in their brains.
Interesting, isn't it, that Elon hasn't even suggested he would be getting a Neuralink chip in his brain...
He will probably want to use it, once it was tested on expendable poor people.
The difference is that it's consensual, you libtard.
Now try not to think about those monkeys we're testing the product on and whether it was consensual for them.
^/s^ ^if^ ^it^ ^wasn't^ ^obvious^
Just because you have someone's consent, doesn't make whatever you do to them legal.
For example, you can sign a contract to allow me to bludgeon you to death, but it's still murder regardless of your consent.
Frankly, Elon has killed enough animals in this endeavor that it's unconscionable to allow him to test it on people. It's only going to end poorly.
When the conspiracy theory said Gates was doing it, it was the end of days.
Now that musk is doing it, it'll be sliced bread 2.0.
Ahh, you can trust the guy who single-hand-idly drove twitter into the ground and pushed a shit sheet metal meme car. He doesn’t know anything about anything, but you can trust him with brain surgery.
Really though, anyone that thinks this is a good idea and signs up for testing probably deserves the lobotomy they’re going to end up with.
Man, I don't know what right wingers y'all are talking about.
I come from a super right wing family and all them MFs think this is a bad idea too (though to be fair, they're def on the conspiracy theory "everything is to get a microchip in my blood/brain" side of things).
Well someone is gargling elons cock, and it's not lefties. So you figure out the math and that's who they're talking about.
"centrists"
Is a centrist anyone who says "I'm not into politics but (right wing propaganda)" because that's unironically been my experience so far.
I come from a super-right wing family too (but from Europe) and they really are in love Elon because it's like "a dog being out of control" in the billionaire group, the one who is brave enough to go against the rules, defying the "cancel culture" and the unidirectional thinking imposed by political correctness.
I just vomited a bit in my mouth
Obviously I don't approve of any of it, let it be clear... Lemmy for me is a sort of "therapy group" where I find relief from that toxic environment.
There's no way the FDA approved that shit.
There is no way i’m putting that shit in my brain even if FDA approves it.
You're being awfully combative. If this behavior continues, the court will mandate installation of a calming chip in your brain.
Finally cyberpunk begins. We need more neon lights, but thanks to LEDs I am looking positively towards our future.
Probably already been hacked. We just haven't heard about it yet.
No need to hack when the fatality rate in primates is already so high.
I remember reading an article just a few weeks ago about a company that made a combination prosthetic/implant for blind people to be able to see in the...early 2000s, I think? It was an early technology, low-rez, but somewhat miraculous for some.
And then the company went out of business.
As the implants began to wear out, or the software developed bugs, or the patients' needs changed, things fell apart. They lost their vision and nobody could help them because the hardware and software were proprietary.
Now Elon Musk—with his reputation for quality control and following through with ideas and open source—wants to put things in our brains. Backed by the full faith and credit of Elon Musk.
One day he's going to push down an update that makes everybody with a Neuralink stop and say "hehe butts" in a funny voice, and the tech bros will say "lol great meme Elon" even though a dozen of them got hit by a car because they were forced to stop while they walked across the street, and thirty of them lost their jobs because they said "hehe butts" to their managers, and one of them was a soldier who said "hehe butts" in an active warzone and blew the whole squad's cover.
I can't believe anyone is honestly entertaining this.
Nothing against experimenting with this chip in Musk's brain. It's always good to start with something simple.