this post was submitted on 01 May 2025
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It's been a long time since I read any of the bible, but wasn't there some story in it somewhere where some guy uses that and is immediately killed by god or something? (albiet I think the justification was some sort of tradition obligating him to have a child with a specific person, and his behavior was supposed to be exploiting that without fulfilling his end or something like that).
Onan was punished because he was trying to fuck over Tamar. Tamar was his brother’s wife, and his brother died. Because women had essentially no rights or property, it was expected that a widow without children would be given to her husbands brother, so he could knock her up and have a son to take care of her. (Levirate marriage)
Onan was trying to screw Tamar out of being able to survive - trying to make it so that he would inherit all of his father Judah’s money. God noticed this, and killed him.
The funny part is the follow up - Judah has another son, but is like “oh shit, this women is cursed. She’s lead to the death of two of my sons, I don’t want to lose the last one.” So he tells her to go hang out with her parents until his son is “ready” - clearly intending to blow her off forever.
So Tamar eventually catches on, realizes that she’s never getting what’s hers, so dresses up like a temple prostitute and goes to the city. Judah comes across her disguised as a prostitute, and she asks for his family crest as payment for their roll in the hay.
After this, she becomes pregnant. The elders of the group bring her before Judah, saying “hey, your daughter in law is a massive whore and is pregnant. We’re going to kill her.” He asks her who knocked her up, she produces the crest.
Judah is then like “oh dang, you got me.” She doesn’t get killed, she gets her inheritance, and is possibly an ancestor of Jesus.
Really an amazing trickster figure - very reminiscent of Jacob and Esau. The coolest story in the Bible imho - it’s so out of pocket and against the way that women are usually shown in Genesis (in a way that makes me suspect there’s a true story here somewhere). She’s just as clever as Jacob, and clearly more clever than Judah.
Onan, which is why wanking is called onanism. To me it's an odd story because it seems more like a social construct than a divine command. So I wonder if it's been heavily abridged and he died for some other reason that's been left out and they just said God did it because they wanted to reinforce that construct. If God really had a habit of dropping bodies just for spilling their seed, well, let's just say there'd be several thousand reasons why I wouldn't be typing this right now.
Ancient stories are almost always parabolic. If there’s not a lesson to be made, then it’s not preserved. Recording history only for history’s sake a fairly modern value. So you’re absolutely right. Ancient texts, especially scriptures, tend to attribute things to god whenever it’s convenient for the narrative.
That would be Onan, found in Genesis chapter 38.
No idea, but wouldn't be surprised.