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Mainly that there are really solid midrange android phones nowadays. I just can't justify the iPhone pricetag.
That has to be the biggest factor by far. I got my pixel 6a for around 300€ total with a mobile plan (free calls, sms and a small amount of data)
Does everything I and realistically the vast majority of people need it for. And you can get perfectly usable phones for even less.
There is no way apple can beat that value, even if their update policy and thus longevity is one of the few things I envy.
Also many benefits of the iphone imo rely on being invested in their ecosystem.
The thing that can make up for lower Android longevity is the custom ROMs that might be out there (especially for common models like your pixel!) I do love the smoothness of the Apple ecosystem but alas I cannot afford it. I quite like Linux anyway.
You are right that the tech-savy can extend their longevity through custom ROMs, but that isn't for the average user. And you shouldn't have to resort to that to begin with.
The update policy just makes otherwise great phones become obsolete (in some ways) way too fast.
Sony smartphones for example are imo great in many ways (e.g. still retain the headphone jack and sd card slot) outside of being pricey. Yet they only get 2 years of updates (and maybe slightly longer security updates). That's just not acceptable in any world. Especially when you might not want to buy them at lauch price, since unlike iphones you can get decent discounts on androids for older models.