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this post was submitted on 25 Jun 2024
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Its what literally changed my life. I was really socialy awkward, spend most of my lide behind a computer, and when I managed to go out to parties in a subculture scene parties I loved, I couldnt talk to anyone, had a few beers awkwardly in a corner and went home.
Then I met someone who introduced me to MDMA. That happened almost 8 years ago, and now I am an organizer of 2/3 of the same scene regular parties in our city, Im helping and DJing on a festival that happens here, and am living my best life in that regard. All thanks to that one best friend who got me something that made me talk to, and get to actually know people in the scene in the extent that I always wanted, and get comfortable enough that I no longer need to be high to interact with anyone. Since now they are friends and regulars, and not random people I wanted to talk to, but was afraid of approaching.
But, it wasn't as easy as it sounds. I was always trying to be responsible and cautious, and In did get bordeline to addiction in the process, which I was fortunately able to recognize early and put a stop to it by getting help in a adictiology nonprofit. It was never bad, more like a precaution. And I caught it in the best possible moment. I'll never forget my first group session, where literally everyone else said "I'm 35+, I used to take stuff at parties for fun when I was 25, and then I ended for 10 years in meth...".
Everyone had similar story. And I went "Well, I'm 25, and I take stuff on parties for fun...". And that was a really strong lesson, where I realized I'm stopping a really huge problem at exactly the right time.
So, it might help. It is definitely fun, but it is so hard to not end up badly. You will need a lot of luck, especially if you are exploring it on your own. I still take things on parties, but with personal experience about the dangers it has. And getting that, is something that no one can give you, unless you see it for yourself. And for most of the people, that comes too late. I was lucky, you probably won't be. But in conclusion - drugs are amazing, and have changed my life. Its a shame that personal experience will probably vary.
For anxiety cases like yours, something that is very seritonigernic (which MDMA is) is very helpful. For unipolar depression without anxiety it may be just a nice manic episode. For type 1 bipolar depression, it might be a nice way to get yourself involuntarily committed, arrested, or, if you're really having a good time, both.