The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/GamerGirlLex77 on 2025-06-15 15:23:45.

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/localcrux on 2025-06-13 20:33:15.

Alright, this might sound petty, but I feel like I was justified.

I (26M) have a small one-bedroom apartment. It’s not fancy, but it’s clean, it’s mine, and I worked my ass off to afford it. Like, IKEA everything, but I got a gaming setup I love and a little fake plant that’s absolutely thriving.

Last weekend, I had a few friends over for pizza and chill. Nothing wild. My friend Kyle (27M), who’s been kinda couch-surfing lately, shows up and IMMEDIATELY starts roasting my place.

Like he walks in and goes, “Damn, bro, is this a studio or a jail cell?” Everyone laughs. I brush it off.

Then he goes, “Yo where’s your dining table? You just eat off your lap like a raccoon?” Again, laughs. I joke back like “Better than eating off someone else’s couch, man,” and everyone laughs again.

But he doesn’t stop. He jokes about my “sad little gamer chair,” my “bare fridge,” and even says my bathroom looks like it’s “been through something traumatic.” It was funny for like 5 seconds. Then it got annoying. Then it got rude.

Fast forward to this week, he texts me saying he got kicked from the place he was staying and asks if he can crash on my couch for a few nights. I literally responded, “I thought my apartment was too sad for you, man.”

Now he’s calling me petty. A few mutuals said I should’ve let it slide because he’s “going through a lot.” I feel for him, but like… why would I let someone stay in a place they just spent an hour clowning?

So yeah, AITA for not letting my buddy crash at my place after he roasted it in front of everyone?

TL;DR: Friend made fun of my apartment all night during a hangout. A few days later, he asks if he can crash on my couch. I said no. Now he says I’m being petty. AITA?

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/CottonBuds81 on 2025-06-13 05:00:57.

Left NZ for Sydney, they always knew my number but kept sending mail to my previous address where no one is home, this is first contact with the ird. I'm out of a job with a child to raise, 8% interest ffs.

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/valriser on 2025-06-12 04:01:18.

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/mermaidpaint on 2025-06-11 20:40:50.

So I (37f) have a sister (40f) who’s a single mom to my niece (17f). She’s done most of it on her own since her daughter was born, and while we’ve had ups and downs, I’ve always tried to be supportive. My husband and I have a 14-year-old daughter ourselves, and we’re not exactly rolling in it either, but we’ve been careful, planned ahead, and have tried to keep things stable.

About five years ago, I started contributing money toward a college fund for my niece. Nothing huge, just here and there. Birthdays, tax return leftovers, a couple hundred from my bonus, that kind of thing. My sister said she was adding some too, and over time it grew to just over $11k. The entire idea, which we both agreed on, was that it was for college only. Not rent, not clothes, not bills and definitely not prom.

Well, Prom was in late April. My niece looked absolutely beautiful. She had this pale blue fitted dress, her hair was done in this really pretty updo, makeup was on point, nails, shoes, they all looked great. She and her friends got a limo, went to a some Italian restaurant before the dance, and did a little photo shoot thing. It wasn’t celebrity-level extravagant, but it was definitely expensive. I remember seeing the photos and thinking, “wow, they all look amazing,” followed immediately by, “how exactly did they pay for this?”

So earlier this week I was going over some financial stuff (I’ve been managing the account the college fund is in since it’s technically in my name too), and I see that about $7,000 is gone with no explanation. It wasn’t hacked or anything, it was my sister. She used it to cover prom expenses and didn’t even mention it to me.

When I called her, she didn’t even seem that surprised to hear from me. She was kind of cagey at first, then got defensive and said she only used some of the fund and that there’s still enough for a couple semesters at community college if niece doesn't get a scholarship somewhere else. Like that makes it okay.

I told her I was shocked she didn’t ask me and she just went off about how it was her daughter’s only prom, that she deserved something special, and how she’s been through so much lately and she just wanted her to feel like she belonged. I get that things have been rough for them. But I still couldn’t believe she just dipped into that money like it was hers.

Then she hits me with: “I was gonna rebuild the fund over the summer anyway, but I’m short now, can you spot me like $2k just for now?”

I told her no. I didn’t yell or anything, just a clear no. And now it’s a full-on meltdown. She said I’m holding money over her head, that I’m showing my true colors, that I don’t really care about her or my niece, and now she’s dragged our mom and other relatives into it. My mom texted me this whole long thing about family sticking together and how prom only happens once.

And the worst part? My niece texted me too. She said she didn’t know the money came from her college fund and she’s sorry, and that she doesn’t want me and her mom to fight. And now I feel like absolute garbage.

But like what was I supposed to do? I’ve got my own daughter, and we’ve been saving bit by bit for her too. I can’t just casually drop thousands of dollars to refill a fund someone else emptied without even telling me. My husband agrees with me and said if we want to help my niece with college in the future, we can, but not directly through my sister.

I love my niece and I want her to succeed. But I don’t trust my sister with money anymore. And I’m sick of being made out to be some villain for having boundaries.

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/GamerGirlLex77 on 2025-06-10 14:49:22.

I am NOT the Original Poster. That is u/umieranie. She posted in r/relationship_advice .

Thanks to u/Direct-Caterpillar77 u/Choice_Evidence1983 and u/MsDutchie for letting me know about the update.

Previous BORU here. **New Update marked with *******

Do NOT comment on Original Posts. The latest update is 7 days old per the rules of this sub.

Trigger Warning: verbal abuse

Mood Spoiler: happy ending

Original Post: June 29, 2024

I (23F) am engaged to John (24M). We are together for 5 years. We want to get married in july 2025. I always thought that his family liked me because we get along well. He has two older brothers (26M,29M), both married. Honestly, I was very excited to have them all as my in laws. They were always kind to me.

Some kind of important information: About a year ago when I was scrolling on instagram I saw a profile that was kind of cringy but in a cute way. It was an older woman’s profile who shared inspirational quotes. I remember one particular post and it was something in the lines of „Only stupid people pretend to know everything. Don’t pretend. Just ask”. Honestly this quote changed me in a lot of ways. Before that I was always worried that I might embarrass myself if I don’t know something and after reading that quote I realized that if I always pretend that I know everything then I’ll miss out on actually getting to learn about things. So I decided to change my habits and start admitting that sometimes I genuinely don’t know. Someone is talking about the war in Kosovo? Okay sure but first let me ask some questions so I can really understand what we’re talking about. And I ask a lot of questions sometimes.

I sometimes even open the notes app and write in some questions that I later want to find answers to. These are my latest:

1. How does the time work in the black hole?
2. Why some snails have shells and others don’t????
3. What food is okay for ducks?
4. How does the light bulb work (the old ones with gas inside them)?
5. Does everyone see colours the same? and How can we know that??

Sorry for the long introduction, but it was kind of necessary for understanding what kind of person I am. I know that sometimes I might come across as annoying.

Now onto the problem: his parents hosted a small barbecue last weekend only for the family. So it was the mom (54F), dad (59M), brothers (26M, 29M) and their wives (27F, 27F). I was the last person who showed up because I had to work late. I entered the house and when I was walking towards the back of the house into the backyard I heard John’s mom talking about me. To be honest she wasn’t talking about me, more like mocking me. I heard her say in a high pitched voice „How does the sun work? Where should I put the fork? Why does nobody like me? How do I wipe my ass?”. I just stood there. I had this sinking feeling. I couldn’t move, so I just stood there. And I heard them all laughing. One of the wives said „I actually don’t mind her always asking questions. I think it’s cute” and it made me feel hopeful that they will say something like „yeah sure we’re just playing, we love that”. But none of them did. Instead the mom replied „It’s not cute. She’s just stupid.” After that they laughed again. I heard John laughing. My heart kind of broke in that moment because he didn’t even say one positive thing. He didn’t defend me. He just laughed. I quietly turned around and left the house. I texted John that I got sick and have to stay home. Now I’m wondering how should I approach this situation.

We live together and I sleep in the guest bedroom for now and I use the excuse that I don’t want him to get sick from being around me. I can’t ignore him forever and I can’t pretend to be sick anymore, because it’s been too long.

I’m not sure how do i proceed. Maybe it was just a misunderstanding. I’m considering talking to them about this, but I’m also worried that they won’t be honest with me. I can’t marry him if he really thinks I’m stupid. But I also can’t marry into a family who think so little of me. But maybe it was a joke and I shouldn’t take it so seriously… I’m so torn apart and everyday I convince myself a bit more that it’s okay and sometimes we should all laugh about ourselves. Now i feel like i’m just going crazy. I would really appreciate some advice.

Tldr; Overheard future MIL calling me stupid and my fiancé laughed. Considering leaving him. I’m wondering if it might be just a joke and maybe a misunderstanding. Need advice on how to navigate the situation.

EDIT: There are many comments saying that they cannot stand people like me. I agree that sometimes I can be a bit too much with the questions, but with that being said I still think I’m within reason. I don’t do it around people I just met, I rarely do it at parties or other gatherings. I usually do it with people who are close to me - who I think wouldn’t judge me or with people who specifically have knowledge about something and are willing to share it. If Im a part of a conversation - I’m not rude and i’m not interrupting, I usually just ask one or two questions. If a discussion is about the climate change I’m not asking about monkeys if you know what I’m saying. I’m also not a complete dumbass. I don’t ask questions which generally would be considered dumb to other people. Those I just write in the notes and check answers later in the internet. I’m capable of reading so I make good use of it. But after all I still do ask questions a lot.

Update Post: July 2, 2024 (3 days later)

First of all, I wanted to say thank you to people who reached out to answer my questions about black holes, snails, ducks, light bulbs and other stuff. I would love to have you as my friends.

For the other people who said I should just shut up - I don’t really care if you find me annoying or hard to be around. I’m okay with that. I don’t exist to please everyone. I’m just here for a good time, have my own interests and learn.

I didn’t expect my post to gain so much attention but I’m so grateful for the advice. Most of you told me to break up with him and at the very least confront him, so that’s what I decided to do. You gave me a push and confidence to do it.

But before I did that, I texted the wife of John’s brother, the one who said she liked me asking questions. I asked if we can meet up for coffee. She said sure.

We met and I didn’t see the point in pretending to her that I didn’t hear their conversation. So after some small talk I just said „I heard you all talking about me during the bbq”. She immediately got sad and said she feels embarrassed. She explained that it wasn’t a joke, wasn’t out of context, that it was just mean and hurtful. She said she’s sorry for not defending me more, but I said that’s it’s okay and I understand. I told her that I don’t blame her for anything, and just wanted to make sure that I understand the situation and see it for what it really was.. And it really was laughing about me behind my back. Just bullying.

At this point I just had to confront John. In my last post so many comments were saying that he will probably try gaslighting me. And you were right.

We were having dinner together for the first time since the bbq happened, because before I tried my best to avoid him. (Yes, I know, not very mature of me, but other than you guys I don’t really have a strong support system. My family and best friends are hundreds of kilometers away. I only have two good friends here) I was so stressed I thought I’m going to pass out. My legs were shaking and I was terrified because I knew deep down that this is the moment when my five year relationship goes down the drain.

I looked him in the eyes and asked „How does the sun work?”. He looked confused, so I followed with „Where should I put my fork? Why does nobody like me?” At this point realization hit him and he started nervously laughing. I said I was there and I heard them. After the initial shock passed, he got mad. He said its rude to eavesdrop. I said it’s rude to bully people.

He tried telling me that it was just a joke. That I shouldn’t be so uptight. That it really was funny. I said that I didn’t find it funny and went to the guest to calm down. He started panicking. He was asking me to please talk to him. He was much more apologetic and said that he will be 100% honest with me. I asked if his mother made similar comments before the bbq. He said yes. I asked him if he ever defended me. He said he tries to. I don’t know if I believe him. He told me he loves me and respects me. I don’t know if I believe it either.

I said that I love him too, but I need a break. He’s all I ever known. He was my first and only partner. I have no outside perspective of this, I have no experience. I need a moment to think. I will be going to my friends house for a while to think everything through. The apartment has his name on the...

Content cut off. Read original on https://old.reddit.com/r/OhNoConsequences/comments/1l80ofc/oop_overhears_her_fiance_and_his_family_make_fun/

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/bookwormsolaris on 2025-06-10 14:17:53.

I (55F) have been married to my husband and my daughter's stepdad (63M) for 4 years.

My 23 yo daughter and I have a complicated relationship.

She has been diagnosed with dissociative identity disorder. She has a lot of trauma from watching me and my husband's horrible marriage go down and was bullied in school. When she told me she was being bullied by peers, my view that all children are innocents really tied my hands because I told her that if I said anything to them, I would be an adult harassing a child.

She has blamed me for that ever since. And keeps referring to this one time where the kids at school called her trash due to the fact that she wasn't taking care of her hygiene due to depression. Part ( not all) of my response was telling her to take a shower and I bought her new clothes. The bullying finally ended with an expulsion and a suspension for the ringleaders. She still throws the fact that a school clinic volunteer told her that if she was their kid she'd have permission to punch back if administrators didn't do anything.

I thought that having her live with me while she finishes school and gets a job would help heal some childhood wounds if my second husband and I modeled a healthy relationship. However, my daughter now doesn't get along with my husband. She is a very introverted, creative person who likes immersing herself in escapism. So she'd get annoyed if she was sitting eating alone and my husband would sit across from her and eat. Saying she ate later so she could eat alone.

However, my husband started acting distant from me and my daughter complained that his eyes lingered for too long. She got very angry and there was a lot of shouting and slamming of doors. Finally my husband admitted he's attracted to her and it's hard to be around her all day. Said she was walking temptation and said that's why he was avoiding sex with me.

I was so upset to hear this. I don't blame my daughter for this, but at the same time the situation has become unbearable. Something would have to give, and I couldn't collect my thoughts with both of them still being in the house.

So I gave my daughter money to stay at an extended stay hotel and asked her to utilize her college's emergency financial and housing resources they have for students in need. She responded by storming out and telling my ex who is now circling social media using it to paint me as the villain of all villains.

I'm not abandoning my daughter. She qualifies for those resources anyway since my ex is unemployed and we are in substantial debt. I just need time to process the situation and don't want to leave my house to stay with my daughter when I have a marriage to figure out whether or not to save. AITA?

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/J_S_M_K on 2025-06-10 14:12:03.

I am not The OOP, OOP is u/Hot_Relation899

OOP has since deleted her account

I stalked my husband for two years before I formally met him

Originally posted to r/offmychest

Original Post June 30, 2023

I (24F) married my husband (28M) about a year and a half ago. The first time I saw my husband I was a freshman in high school, he was a freshman in college. He was walking his dog at the park, when he stopped to talk to my brother (27M) because they happened to go to high school together. That was the moment I became hooked. That same day I found his Instagram, his family’s social media, and also where he lived since my brother offered to walk him home while I tagged along. When I got home that day I knew I wanted him, but of course I was only 14 while he was 18, so I came up with a plan.

I found out his younger brother was only one year younger than me and would be attending my current high school. I figured that I had to befriend his younger brother by any means possible next year when he moves up as a freshman while I become a sophomore, and I did. It took around halfway of my junior year where we became best friends and he invited me over regularly to his house to hangout, this is where I was able to befriend my current husband’s mom, and god did she love to talk about him. From her, I found out what college he goes to, his past girlfriends, what his elementary/middle school was, his favorite/least favorite foods, his pet peeves, what he likes, etc etc. Eventually when my visits started getting more and more frequent, I formally met current husband again. Current husband, I’ll call him E, would come over every other week and stay for either Friday-Sunday, or Saturday to Sunday. On those days specifically I would wear my cutest outfits to impress him, and also joke around with him a lot. Eventually I befriended him as well. A little background on E, he is the school record holder for a certain sport at my school, which I just so happened to do. And around halfway through my senior year E came back during the season to help coach the current high school athletes, which included me, in order to get some more volunteer work hours in, and I got to spend a lot more time with him. I loved every second of it. We were friends before, but then we became much closer since I got to spend lots of extra time with him after school, where sometimes he would even drive me home since we lived relatively close.

Fast forward to when I had to move away to NYC for college, E moved with me since he coincidentally got a job near my college. (Edit: I lied, it wasn’t a coincidence. I found out he got a job offer and applied to a college nearby his workplace) Being eachothers only friends in a new state, we became incredibly close. We started dating when I was almost a sophomore year of college, he proposed to me after I graduated, and we just got married almost a year ago. He knows absolutely nothing about how I truly know him, and believes it is fate that brought us together through his younger brother. Lately I have been debating on whether or not I should tell him, or at least his younger brother the truth, since the only reason I befriended him was to get closer to E. I feel guilty every time he tells others our love story, because the truth is, I’ve known him for 10 years, while he’s only known me for about 7.

UPDATE: I read a reply saying that the best thing for MYSELF is to keep it a secret, which is what a lot of people are saying, but the best thing for HIM is to tell him, and I figured that person really is right. I will be telling him this Tuesday on his day off, he deserves to know who he married.

Update July 6, 2023

I told him this fourth of July. After the fireworks mostly ended and we were heading back, I asked him in the car, "Wouldn't it have been weird if we met each other before the first time we actually met? But we just didn't think of each other as significant at the time?" He smiled and turned to me saying, "Pfft, that's impossible. There's no universe where we would have met and I would not think of you as significant." That statement struck me in the heart, because I knew I would soon prove that sentence VERY wrong, but i continued on with my plan anyway. "What if I told you we have met each other before? Before that time I was introduced as 'E's little brother's friend'?" He looked at me like I was crazy, so that's when I pulled over on the side of the road and pulled out my phone to show him the post I put up here before, that explained everything.

He took about 8 minutes to read the whole thing, and when he finished he put the phone down and stared straight ahead, almost like he was dumbfounded, scared, and confused all at the same time. I started throwing out every excuse and apology I could muster at the moment for about 15 minutes straight when he decided to tell me to stop, and I did. Then he just sat there and sobbed uncontrollably for about 10 minutes before he finally asked me how much of our relationship, and how much of my identity, was fabricated according to his liking, I told him the honest truth, none of my personality or identity was fabricated for him, accept for the fact of how we met. The only thing I ever changed about myself to make him like me more was lying about liking Chinese food, I hate Chinese food. But other than that everything else was real. Although my friendship with his younger brother was built upon ill intentions, my friendship between his brother and I are now one of the most genuine friendships I have now.

He just cried and told me that he does not want to divorce at all, but he does want us to have some time apart so that he could absorb the truth that I gave him. He also said that he expects me to tell his brother and mom this Friday because they deserve to know the truth just as much as he did. I told him okay, and we drove the rest of the ride home in silence. When we got home he hugged me and cried for about 5 minutes before he got out the car, packed his stuff, and said that he will be staying at a nearby hotel for now. He said that he knows that he still loves me, but does not yet know how to react to the fact that the beginning of our relationship was very, very orchestrated.

To sum it all up, I guess telling him was a success? I honestly don't know. He sent me a goodnight and I love you text last night while he was at the hotel, so I guess he's noy as much mad as he may be betrayed?

UPDATE 2: Woke up this morning to find out that "hubby" not only lied about going to a hotel to stay at, but also lied about not wanting a divorce, through a text message. He went to his family's home, not a fuvking hotel. Told them the entire story himself, probably exaggerated it too to make me seem crazy. His whole family wants nothing to do with me too, claims I'm psycho. He said that he lied about going to a hotel, because he knew if he told the truth I would try to stop him? Honestly I feel so betrayed. I tried to be a good wife by showing him the true me, and this is what he does? I did all this work just for it to end up like this? Honestly, I kind of deserve it. I didn't even tell him in the first place because I felt bad, I told him because I had a suspicion that he was catching on to the fact that I knew him for two and a half years before he knew me, largely because I found out he was keeping my old phone in his work desk. My old phone that has screenshots of a lot of his old instagram posts, plans in my notes app about him, etc. So I guess he never truly loved me if he can't even get past an honest confession like this one. I might update this in a few years when I find a new husband lol.

THIS IS A REPOST SUB I AM NOT THE OOP

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/csstraight on 2025-06-10 07:35:32.

My friend and I have been close since 2nd grade. I love him to death and throughout our adult years he has been more financially successful. He has supported me through these times and I would do the same.

I was always better with women though, a lot better. So my friend (we will call him John) gets a gf let’s call her Emily and he really likes her. We are talking and I kinda joke how I could take Emily if I wanted her and he says I can’t and ask me not to joke like that.

Well in my mind I said challenge accepted. I’ll spare you the details but we had sex and it was fairly easy. Well John blocked me and her…. I tried to contact him with burner numbers and social media accounts but he ignores it.

I messed up bad but it’s important to note they weren’t together long. Should I give him space or? Any suggestions are appreciated

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/J_S_M_K on 2025-06-08 17:10:03.

So this is a good learning experience for me and a period of growth. My friend Malcolm and I have the type of friendship where we clown each other. I mostly clown him but sometimes he jokes me and we always dying laughing lol.

Recently we did a competition to see who can bench press 225 for the most reps and he beat me by a decent bit. We both workout together but I’m more of a runner and he’s the lifter type…so he joked about beating me in the reps. I said “I’ll take the L but at least I didn’t take the L in the dating game to my own brother”. For context my friend’s gf of 3 years cheated on him with his own brother a week ago. He didn’t find the joke funny and he just left the gym and told me to uber/lyft home. He’s been ignoring all my text and it’s been a day now….

This is an important lesson about learning what jokes are appropriate and what aren’t. My fiancée tells me all the time I need to work on my timing and delivery when it comes to jokes or other stuff I say. I was in denial but this made me realize she was right. He hasn’t taken the break up well because he really was head over heels for that girl and so I can see why making that joke so soon was bad timing. This is what my gf be talking about 🤦🏽‍♂️. I asked her what to do and she said get him a gift card to his favorite restaurant or something. I did that but when I messaged him saying I got him a gift card he just thumbs up the message. So I just don’t know what to do

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/GamerGirlLex77 on 2025-06-08 14:47:36.

So my family is my dad, mom, my two sisters and my two brothers. I'm (17m) the oldest. My dad was estranged from his dad since he was my age. His mom died when he was 10. So we never knew grandma either. My dad was open about the fact grandpa wasn't a very nice man and all kinds of stuff. But he never went into details. I know he really did a number on dad because I still sometimes see dad look ashamed if he spills something or makes a mistake. I also know he tries to hold back any time he cries and looks downright disgusted with himself for crying.

Three years ago his dad reached out and my mom and my sister (15) were SO excited and basically welcomed him into the family. Dad said no way. He and mom fought a lot about it. My siblings all told dad they had a right to know our grandfather and he should love his dad.

I was dragged along at first and I stopped going. Dad has refused to have any part in it and he and mom fought because he told her his father was never going to step foot inside our house and if he did, then dad would leave and he would never come back. So mom takes my siblings to see him.

Christmas was a huge fucking fight last year because they decided to spend it with this dude and my dad refused to go and so did I. My siblings started crying into dad's face that they wanted Christmas with him. Mom was calling him selfish. She tried to do the whole "I'm your mother and you listen to me" and dad told her he's my father and I could stay with him if I wanted to.

They're still sour about it but then dad took me out for his birthday and didn't come home until late because he found out they were planning to take him out to meet with his father. My dad told my mom and my siblings since he cannot trust them with his birthday, he will only celebrate with the people he can trust now. I also heard him tell mom this couldn't continue and they needed to divorce.

Now my mom is freaking out because she doesn't want the divorce and my siblings are really upset. They told me I should help since dad and I are still close. I told them they should learn to live with the consequences of their decisions. I pointed out to mom she was always big on us learning. I told them this is a big one. My mom told me my siblings are so young and don't deserve this. I told her it's all her fault because she undermined dad by making a point to demand he come in front of my siblings and so they think they can manipulate him and not listen.

AITA?

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/KWAYkai on 2025-06-08 02:40:26.

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/colorsofautomn on 2025-06-07 02:17:24.

I do not have kids, and I also have not really had a lot of experience dealing with kids before my niece. I don’t have younger siblings or cousins, I never babysat, etc. I’m explaining this because this is my blind spot and why I’m posting.

About a month ago, my niece “Gabby” and I were at the park together. I like to spend time with her and usually take her out to do things just the two of us every couple of weeks. While we were at the park, I was talking about an event I am going to attend with my boyfriend of a few years. She asked to see my dress, so I showed her a pic of me in it.

She made a “yucky” face and said “That’s soooooooo ugly. You look really fat. Isn’t [[my boyfriend]] gonna think it's bad?”

I was so hurt. She’s only 13! I’m not even a big girl in any sense. I have fat on my body, but I am definitely not fat.

My sister was surprised and said she would talk to her. A few days later she had Gabby come over to apologize. From my POV, it was not sincere. She was rolling her eyes and looked angry and just got out the words. I told her thank you for apologizing and then told them to leave. I have not gone out my way to spend time with her since.

I had told Gabby that I would take her shopping for the summer and we’d pick out fun stuff together. I look forward to doing things like this with her. Not really anymore. When we were at my mom’s house for mother’s day, Gabby asked me when we would go.

After her stunt I’ve changed my mind. I said that she probably has plenty of summer clothes to wear. She was upset and said “But I said I was sorry!” over and over.

I told her that I know she said she was sorry but just because someone says they’re sorry to you doesn’t mean that your actions are forgiven. That you have to prove to the other person you won’t do it again, and she hasn’t.

My mom and sister say I’m expecting adult behavior from a child and that it was ridiculous to cancel the shopping date. I am apparently beefing with a child at my big age. They said that she apologized and hasn’t said anything else rude to me since. They asked how long I’m going to hold it against her.

I really don’t know how to take this. I trust their judgment most of the time. But this was just an outright mean thing from her. I am worried that as she grows up this behavior will continue and she will turn out to be a bully. AITA?

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/hoginlly on 2025-06-06 08:02:41.

I'm new to my area and I have made friends with a few neighbors through a mommy and me group**.** I have been in the group now a little over a month and I have a 9 week old. I have a neighbor who is in the group and she asked me last week in an emergency if I could watch her 3 and 5 year old, she looked desperate so I agreed. I was like well its just once. I am a full-time SAHM and enjoy all my time with my little one. That day I watched her children was hectic as hell, my daughter was fussy and they children were very rambunctious to say the least. I was happy when she came and got them 6 hours later.

She came to me today saying she needed me to watch the kids in the afternoons, I told her no. I'm not a fulltime babysitter and have no desire to take that much time away from my own child and navigating life with my child and husband.

Her response was well its not like I'm asking a lot, its just the afternoons. I said it may not be a lot to her but it is a lot to me. My husband works from home and he needs the house quiet to work, and I'm a new mom and I'm not interested on taking on any other responsibilities other than what I have right now. She told me I was selfish, I told her she was entitled to think that I SHOULD help her just because I'm at home with my little one. AITAH for being so forward?

EDIT: So she went on the group chat trying to disparage me, saying I'm selfish blah blah blah. One of the mom's asked her why she felt I had a responsibility as a SAHM to watch her children? Then another mom confessed and reminded her in the group chat that she tried that with her and was told that the SAHM mom's in the group are not her babysitters and she needs to make arrangements for childcare independent of the group. She attempted to double down then the moderator/ creator of the group told her it would might be best if she found another mom group to socialize with. Then she back-tracked and apologized. I was separately contacted by the moderator and told that if she contacts me or another mom for this reason again she will be expelled from the group.

I want to thank all of you for your support and understanding my concerns. I'm navigating this and trying to figure out this new life. A year ago I was a college student hanging out with my fiancé (now husband) and now I'm a mom and a wife in a new part of the country. So its a lot of adjusting. Thank you for your help.

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/Tyler1620 on 2025-06-05 17:50:47.

Original: https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/comments/1idxieb/aita_for_upsetting_my_wife_so_shell_clean_more/

So, hi. It's been a while. I don't have a lot to say, but I was asked to update if I ever decided to try therapy and I did. I didn't like it. I dropped out of individual therapy after two sessions (my therapist was more interested in my childhood than giving me actual advice) but stuck with couples therapy. I tried, I really did. The therapist and my "wife" would gang up on me. The therapist changed my wife a lot. She went from being kind and soft spoken to rude and brazen. She would snap on me for absolutely nothing and constantly bring up things I've done in the past to use against me in an argument to try and make me submit.

Remember how my "wife" is an RN? Yeah, well she was fucking cheating on me with some ugly c*nt working the same shifts as her. She confessed to that in therapy and said if I could forgive her she could forgive "all the things I've done." NOTHING I have ever done has been close to this. I HAVE NEVER CHEATED. VOWS MEAN NOTHING APPARENTLY.... she also shared a lot of things she never told me, like her last grandparent passing away. In her words, "he wouldn't care." Yes I would have if she told me. She had no reason not to. I wouldn't have been so harsh about the housework if I knew she was grieving, but no, go ahead please, don't tell me anything and then use it against me later because THAT makes sense.

I thought couple therapists were supposed to be neatural. Isn't their entire purpose bringing couples together and helping them understand each other? Since when do they call their clients manipulative? How is that allowed? Anyways, back to the b*tch "wife," I can't forgive a cheater. She is staying with her parents for now as we are separated. I don't want her back in my house. It makes sense now why she didn't want to have sex anymore. We stopped going on dates. Our intimacy suffered. All because she cheated. Therapy was a waste of time and money, but I guess it was worth it in the end because I learned what kind of person she really is. She disgusts me. I did NOT want therapy but I tried my best for her and to change. That is clearly not what she wanted because she cheated. I learned this information last month and I have finally come to terms with it.

As for my "friends," I'm still cool with a few of them, others clearly look down on me so I don't interact with them anymore, but we don't eat lunch together anymore. I sit elsewhere now and it's not too bad honestly. I'm meeting new people. Maybe I'll find love again soon but who knows. My reputation at work in regards to personal matters is kind of shit now.

Well, that's really it. Thank you for reading.

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/GamerGirlLex77 on 2025-06-05 16:16:25.

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/GamerGirlLex77 on 2025-06-05 12:38:01.

My dad and I (17M) don't have the greatest relationship and never really had. It was one of the reasons my parents divorced and he was always very emotionally distant with me. That hasn't really changed. He started dating Mona two years ago and they're expecting a baby together. Her pregnancy has been really complicated so she was hospitalized several weeks ago and she hasn't come out of the hospital since. I don't know any details other than that.

My dad had to work out of town for two weeks last month, which isn't unusual for him. He's done it almost my whole life. He wanted me to check on Mona and visit her while he was gone. I told him upfront I wasn't doing that but he told me it was important and I should want to check on the baby at least.

But I didn't want to check on Mona or the baby so I didn't check on her. After two days dad called to yell at me and I hung up on him. He ended up cutting his work trip short because Mona went into premature labor. Dad expected me to go be with her until he got there and I refused. He got there and they stopped it but then my dad turned his attention to me.

The last three or four weeks are the most he's ever contacted me. Like ever. And it's all to berate me for not checking in on her and going to her when he asked me to. He asked me what kind of son I was and I told him I'm a good son to the mom who was a real parent to me and a disinterested son to the disinterested dad in my life.

I think Mona had the baby since because she went into labor again. I'm not 100% sure of that but I think so and he's still trying to scream at me for not visiting.

AITA?

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/mermaidpaint on 2025-06-05 09:56:44.

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/GamerGirlLex77 on 2025-06-03 16:43:16.

I am NOT the Original Poster. That is u/Fair-Bee-4149. She posted in r/AmItheAsshole

Do NOT comment on Original Posts. See rule 7. This sub has a 7 day waiting period- thus, the latest update is 7 days old.

Trigger Warning: post-partum depression

Mood Spoiler: hopeful ending

Original Post: May 17, 2024

I (35f) have a friend group of five women (including me). We are all the same age and we have been friends since we were 13. Four of us me included have kids, with my five week old son being the youngest. The fifth friend Emily (fake name) doesn't have kids and hasn't really ever been in a relationship that lasted longer than a couple of weeks. Emily works in a day care centre and has been working there for over 10 years. Nowadays she mainly does admin work but sometimes covers shifts if someone is sick. So she has a lot of experience with kids even though she doesn't have any herself.

The problem with Emily is that she likes to make it known how good she is with kids. So when ever we spend time together as a group with our kids she acts like she knows best when it comes to kids. For example if a kid is having a tantrum she will insert herself in the situation instead of letting the mom take care of it. Or if a child is doing something it shouldn't like eating too much candy, Emily will tell the child "Don't listen to mommy, auntie Emily says it's fine". She also does this at bigger gatherings showing off her superior skills with kids while making us look like we don't know anything. I've talked about this with the other moms and they find it annoying aswell. We thought about saying something but we agreed that taking care of children is such a big part of Emily's identity that it would really hurt her.

On to the problem at hand. Couple of days ago we were hanging out again. Emily asked if she could hold my son and I said yes. A little later the baby started to cry. I went over and tried to take him back. Emily wouldn't let me and kept saying she knows how to do it and tries rocking the baby. I knew my son was hungry so no amount of rocking was going to stop him from crying. I asked Emily again just to give me the baby and she again refused. I was getting upset and asked again and she just kept saying that she knows how to take care of a baby. I said I know but I need to take my baby. I was about to blow but she had my son in her arms so I didn't want to upset her. Suddenly she tried to take the baby to the other room but I stopped her and almost forcefully took my son from her. I was seething and once I had set my son down, I let it all out. I shouted at her that she has no right to keep me from my child and that even with all her experience she can't go over me when it comes to my child. I also told her that I'm sick of her trying to show off her skills using my child. She was really upset and left shortly after.

I don't think anything I said was wrong but AITA for shouting at her? My friends think it's something she needed to hear but going of on her like that might have been too much

OOP is voted NTA

Update Post: May 22, 2024 (5 days later)

Thank you all for your comments. I was happy to see that I wasn’t completely out of line with my outburst but I agree that the way we had been handling (or not handling) the situation wasn’t good.

We tried contacting Emily right after that incident but she just messaged our group chat that she was busy and she’ll get back to us. I managed to get hold of her after the post and invited her to have coffee at my place on Sunday.

We met with one other friend from the group. We thought having all of us there might be too much pressure. My husband took the baby to see my in-laws so he wasn’t there. It was a bit awkward and didn’t get better. I started by apologizing for shouting at her but told her that keeping my child from me wasn’t acceptable behavior from anyone. I told her that we know that she is good with kids and the kids like auntie Emily very much but sometimes she oversteps and gets in the way of how we want to parent our children. My friend gave a couple of examples of the situations but Emily refused to see any problem with her behavior.

Emily got really defensive and told us that we are really ungrateful for all the help she has given and she has put so much effort into kids that aren’t even hers . I told her that of course we are grateful for the help and all we need is for her to be a bit more mindful in certain situations. She doubled down on nothing being wrong about the way she acts. She also started getting nasty about our parenting and bringing up things that we did wrong. I know myself and my friends sometimes make mistakes as do all parents but my friends are great moms who love their kids and would do anything for them. 

Then she got really angry and told me that I don’t deserve my child as I didn’t even want him. Background to this was that I was hesitant to keep my child when I found out I was pregnant since I had had some mental health issues and I was really scared that I would get PPD and might not handle taking care of a baby. I’m so happy that I decided to have him but it was tough back then even with my husband being really supportive. That was the final straw and I kicked her out and told her she will never be  allowed around my child. After she left we called the others and told them what happened. We decided that we would take a step back from Emily for now.

Emily has since blocked all of us on everything. One of our other mutual friends told us that Emily has been making Facebook posts about fake friends who don’t appreciate her help and advice. She’s not naming names but everyone knows she’s talking about us. Most people have seen her in action at get togethers so they understand where we’re coming from. For now we are keeping our distance and maybe if she realizes the problem and apologizes then we might reconsider. 

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/Educational_Wrap_402 on 2025-06-03 13:30:59.

I am not OOP, OOP is u/ThrowRAresentement32 and he posted on r/relationship_advice

Original- November 6th 2021

I know I'm going to get a lot of shit, for the absurd age gap and the way we started. And I agree and I deserve it but I would really like some genuine advice past going to counselling (she won't agree and I can't afford it anyways). Tangible things that I can work on and introduce to help us ge this either as a couple or as effective co-parents.

Long story short: My ex-wife and I were together since middle school. We have four daughters in their teens. I was a SAHD and part time worker for most of my life until my youngest was in middle school. My ex agreed to invest in a passion project business of mine. I hired a receptionist. We started an affair and she baby trapped me. Now we're living together and have a young son.

She resents me because she feels she was fooled. She saw me as a business owner who had a nice car, nice clothes, took her to nice places etc. She thought I was rich so she got pregnant on purpose (admitted it, not an assumption) hoping to use me to not work and sponsor her family from overseas. Well actually my ex-wife and her family are the rich ones. None of our homes were in our names. We were "renting" from her parents and giving them a nominal fee with the expectation that these homes would be left to my ex (and me) after their death. This allowed my ex's salary (~150K, not huge in the high COL area) to stretch and we lived a really good life. I left our marriage with half our savings (~25K) and my personal property and car. I lost my business due to lack of funding and I did not seek alimony.

I resent her because I feel I was fooled. I thought she loved me and couldn't believe the interest a young, hot woman showed in me. She was incredibly persistent and pursued me strongly. But she has no feelings for me, no care or desire. Now that the ruse is dropped, I can't believe I gave up my entire life for what I see was an ego trip. I loved my ex-wife, really I did and still do. But I had never been with another woman and any attempts to open our relationship were shot down. This was like a wet dream come true and I was weak.

Now both me and my gf are in a place we didn't imagine. She's living in a shitty apartment with an old man and still has to work. I've lost my kids, the love of my life, my family, my lifestyle, my business and it's all 100% my own fault. She stopped being intimate with me as soon as she found out I wasn't rich. We're still together on my end because I feel like I need to have something to show for this shit show of a situation. At least I got a son and a partner out of it. At least it wasn't for nothing. And also because I don't trust her with our son. She would never agree to give me full custody and she's not a good mother. I would be worried for his safety and the people she would have him around. I honestly don't know why she hasn't left me from her end.

What can I do to improve this situation? I know logically it would be best to break up and co-parent but I'm afraid for my son and I'm embarrassed for myself. Is there a way to salvage this situation?

I'm thinking of just telling her we can have an open relationship. She can sleep with whoever she wants and go wherever she wants as long as she lives here so I can have my son 100% of the time (I work from home). I don't know if that's the answer here though.

First Update- November 14th 2021

I had an affair, my ex-wife divorced me and my kids absolutely refuse to speak to me.

I was an incredibly involved dad. Most of their lives I worked 1-2 days a week and then stayed home with them the rest. I was closer to them than their mom and I'd like to think I've never disappointed them before this. I made a mistake, it's been over 2 years since it all came out and I haven't been able to make any headway.

My eldest is hung up on the fact that I now have a young son. Every first born of each generation in my family has been a boy for a long time and she broke the streak. I honestly could not care less about that, I've always thought that pressure was stupid and I'm not a traditionally masculine guy that always wanted a boy. But she's so hurt that I have a son and is convinced that's all I've ever wanted and he's replaced her and my daughters. None of that is true. All of my girls said they don't consider themselves to have a brother and want nothing to do with him.

All four of them feel betrayed and blame me for breaking up our family. I deserve the blame, it's my fault and I take responsibility. But I can't change the past and I don't know how I can begin making up for it. My ex has full custody of them but I'm supposed to have visitation one weekend a month. They're all in therapy and it was suggested to not enforce the visitation and respect their boundaries while they work through it. I've done that the entire time and there's no progress made.

Does anyone have any suggestions about what I can do here? My ex absolutely hates me but was always supportive of the girls staying in contact with me. She's respected their wishes but still gives me updates once in a while. My eldest is turning 18 soon and graduating this coming year and probably moving away for university. I feel like the time to make up with her especially is slipping away.

I know I'm the shitty person here. I was a terrible husband but I was honestly a really good dad and I miss my girls. Has anyone been through something like this? How did it turn out? What are your suggestions?

User ask OOP if he fought for costudy.

OOP:" I did fight for custody but they were all old enough that the court considered their preference and the situation and only granted me visitation. A part of that was also because I didn't have the means to get a place large enough for all four girls, my son, my girlfriend and myself. I still don't have room for them in my current apartment and being a mostly SAHD did not give me the experience/education to get a good enough job to support them here.

If I had the choice, I would've chosen my ex and family over my affair partner."

User ask OOP if his AP is his son's mother.

OOP: "She is. I got baby trapped during the affair (something she admitted) which I know makes this much worse. I think I could have maintained a relationship with my girls even after the divorce if I didn't have to stay with my AP and didn't have a new baby."

User tells OOP that he abandoned his family for a girl half his age so he couldn't expect them to want anything to do with them

OOP:" I didn't abandon them. I didn't leave my family for my gf. I wanted to stay with my girls and my ex and work this out. My ex refused because the girls already knew about the affair and it wouldn't be setting a good example and there was going to be another child involved that she wanted nothing to do with. But to be clear, I would've stayed with my family after the affair if given the choice.

The affair was a stupid mistake born out of curiosity since my ex was the only woman I've ever been with. It was not something I was committed to or wanted to continue long term."

User asks OOP if he and his ex had a conversation about exploring their sexuality and why did he sought the affair.

OOP:" I brought this up before and we did have honest conversations about it. We'd been together since middle school and had been each others first and only. She LOVED that. She had no curiosity about other people and thought it was special that we'd only had sex with each other. And she is a very monogamous person in general, couldn't even handle the thought of me being with someone else. If I wanted to be with someone else, it would have to be as a single man.

I didn't seek an affair. My gf pursued me strongly and it just happened. She got pregnant quite early into it. I didn't really plan on anything"

Top response for this comment: "Just happened, huh? You accidentally fell into her vagina?"

User asks OOP why wont he not separate from his AP.

OOP:" I have to stay with her because she's a bad mother and I don't trust her with our son. If we split up then she would have him at least 50% of the time. I would've left a long time ago if not for that."

Second Update- January 26th 2022

Good news: my girlfriend and I have broken up. She has gone back to her home country and left my son with me. Refused to sign any formal custody agreement so I'm hoping she stays there and doesn't bother us again. I'm pretty sure if she comes back and demands time with him I have a good case for maintaining custody. She's not even interested in face timing with him so he remembers her. I feel bad that my son will deal with a shitty/absent mother but I hope I can get him into therapy as he grows.

Bad news: I've tried my best to insist on visitation with my daughters and that has fallen through. They absolutely refused to see me. They wrote me a letter together that says how much they hate m...

Content cut off. Read original on https://old.reddit.com/r/OhNoConsequences/comments/1l2bys4/man_cheats_on_his_wife_and_his_daughters_hate_him/

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/J_S_M_K on 2025-06-03 10:48:33.

This is a repost, I'm not the OP, etc. Thank you to u/JadieBear2113 for leading me down this rabbit hole!

Trigger Warning: There are no actual cakes in this post.

r/CakeEater is a sub for cake eaters. Not chocolate cake or cheesecake or any regular sort of cake, but people who "want to have their cake and eat it too" - who are in a happy marriage and not planning on leaving, but still have an affair, just because.

u/Miserable_Ad_7975 was a Cake Eater who had been having an affair with his AP (Affair Partner) for 6 years. Eventually, his AP's husband cottoned on and filed for a divorce. Worried that his wife would find out, he consulted r/adultery on how best to confess about 10 months ago.

There was one post before these three, but it was deleted before reveddit could archive it.

First post: Calm before the storm - https://www.reddit.com/r/adultery/comments/ms0s4r/calm_before_the_storm/

Tried posting a few days ago but could not find post. Must be lost in cyberspace. Don´t even know if this is the right forum at the moment. In gist: Affair partner got served divorce papers out of nowhere two days ago at work. Her husband knows of us/me. It´s only a matter of time before my wife finds out. Don´t know if i have days or hours before the world as i know it is gone.

Took some time off work to spend time with my wife and two daughers. My body is in turmoil but strangly my mind is clear. It reminds me of the days leading up to my dad passing away. Time has slowed down and I am aware of all the things surrounding me. It´s a nice feeling. My day today was filled with observation of details and appreciation. My wifes smell and the clothes she wore, my daughters laughter, the color of the kitchen tiles, the dog, the yard. Feel blessed to have a healthy and beautiful family. What will my daughters think of me? I look at my wife that i love with all my heart and I see a woman who stood by me no matter what. We had our fair share of ups and downs like most couples but i never imagined a life without her. How do I justify a six year affair? Is that even forgivable?

I don´t know what the future holds. All i know is that the storm is coming and i am here basking in the sun until the clouds come rolling in. I plan to confess over the weekend. Even if I know the outcome I pray she does not leave me. This was so fucking not worth it.

Any suggestions on how to confess? How do you start? W What do i tell my daugheters? I have already made an appointment with a therapist. What else can I do?

Wish me luck!

EDIT: Thank you all for your comments and suggestions. Some of them were hard to read. I dont have time to address all comments but will reply to few to clear some things. Yesterday I reached out to my brother for advice. He left his wife some years ago and married his affair partner. He seemed happy with her. The grass is not greener for him after all and he is planning on leaving her but is stuck at the moment. His advice is to not tell my wife and to minimize if confronted. He also said I should let down AP gently so she does not go nuclear on my wife and family. I am hoping for the best but preparing for the worst.

In the comments, people doubt that Miserable_Ad really loved his wife. He DID cheat on her for 6 years and all. He responds:

I am not confused. Never was. I don´t have a problem separating love from sex. My heart is loyal to my woman and she is it for me.

So many responses about how I dont value my affair partner. Well, since I am on a pour my heart out roll here let me tell you about my affair partner. She is a gorgeous and a smart woman who is funny and open to different experiences. She is younger than my self and my wife. Fit. Seductive. Sexy as fuck. But she is not my wife and does not even compare.

Six years on/off is a long time to invest. As I see it, she is an adult woman who made decisions to cheat with a married man on her husband for whatever reasons. Do I care for her? Yes, six years is a long time. Do I love her? No. Did I say to her I loved her? Yes, of course I did but I lied just as I lied to my wife. Did I use her? Yes, I did. Did she use me? Of course she fucking did. We both knew we were played with fire.

The reason i strayed has nothing to do with my wife. We have a good sex life in general but I do have some kinks that she is not into at all. My affair partner was into the same kinks. That´s how we met and that is why the affair was ongoing for six years. What lead me to starting the affair was my wife being in an accidant that took a toll on her body. Sex was off the table for over a year. I gave in to temptation and when i discovered the affair partner shared my kink I was hooked. So all you people saying my wife was withholding sex and intimacy. No. My wife and I are very intimate. Having sex with my wife is making love. Sex with affair partner is just sex. My wife meets 90% of all my needs. My affair partner meets 10 %.

He gets conflicting advice on whether or not to tell his wife. Most commenters tell him to come clean, but a few don't, including his brother in real life.

His next post is in the aforementioned CakeEater sub, and it quickly becomes obvious that he did not come clean.

First Update: Never saw this comming - https://www.reddit.com/r/Cakeeater/comments/ph3bxg/never_saw_this_comming/

Throwaway. Posted once before. Check it for background. Think this is the sub I should be on.

I was prepared for all scenarios but not this one.

The doom day did not come in the shape I was expecting. AP ended up convinced her STBEX not to spill the beans to my wife in exchange for a smoth divorce. I thought I was in the clear.

Yesterday AP sent me a blurry photo of my wife in the car with another man. She claimed they walked hand in hand to his car from a store in a nearby town to ours. She got a shot of the plates too. After some digging I now know she is having an affair. Don´t know how long for sure but at least 6 months. He is a singe dad our age and is telling her to leave the marriage. She is telling him she loves him.

Afraid to confront her. Feel numb at the moment. Took a day off work. Any advice? I love her and want to stay married.

EDIT: Any advice on how to proceed? Should I just let it run it course and monitor? Should I confront and hope for the best? Should I confess to my affair and hope we all can come clean and make way for a new marriage? I am so fucking utterly confused! I have rehearsed the things I would say and do if she was to find out about MY affaris. I was not prepared for this shit!

He manages to get ahold of his wife's phone while she's in the sauna and confirms the affair over WhatsApp.

Logically yes we are both getting our itches scratched. Whats the big deal?

I am not ruled by logic at this moment. Maybe later but now my emotions are overpowering every logic. never in my life have I experienced this type of emotional and physical distress. I can´t even think straigt. Never thought I was gonna bowl my eyes out and throw up on the carpet.

I am desperate to talk this out to know why this happend and how invested she really is in this peace of shit. If she is doing this out of revenge maybe I have a chance cause if so she does feel something for me at least. I can´t imaginge her being emotionless throwing away over 20 years. I know this woman like I know my self. Deep down she´s hurt but also so very stubborn and proud. I just want to know if she knew about my affair why the hell did she not confront me? I would have chosen her over AP in a nanosecond. And what the hell is she hoping to find with this dush? He is no better than me, sleeping with a married woman. Ah fuck! I am trying to respect her wish to have some space but I am desperate desperate desperate to just talk to her.

Yeah I don´t know how I feel about being on the other side. Never had fantasies about my wife fucking other men. We had a good sex life minus my kinks she was not aware of (hence the LTAP). I am thinking what do I have to lose? There can be only two outcomes. She loves him she leaves. She loves me she stays. I am hoping this is just a fling and nothing serious.

Some of the commenters offer sympathy, but most opt for schadenfreude.

Second Update: UPDATE Never saw this comming - https://www.reddit.com/r/Cakeeater/comments/pkbju1/update_never_saw_this_comming/

My marriage seems to be over.

Confronted wife this past weekend. Sat her down without warning and told her I knew she was having an affair and with whom. Asked her if she loved him and what her plan was.

She was cought off guard. Went to the bathroom for ten minutes. When she came out she looked me straight in the eyes and said "I know about your affair too. I have known for some time now. I love him and want a divorce".

Next days were a blure. I tried to talk to her but she shuts me down. She has moved into the spare bedroom and is making appointments with law firms. Has told our two girls. I have signed up for emergency therapy. Am on meds for dealing with anxiety and lack of sleep. This is surrea...

Content cut off. Read original on https://old.reddit.com/r/OhNoConsequences/comments/1l28qkp/a_cake_eater_discovers_that_his_wife_has_also/

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/Tyler1620 on 2025-06-02 21:16:08.

Last year my dad found out my mom was cheating on him and they broke up. Mom moved in with her AP "Ron" and she tried to carry on like nothing happened. With me (16f) and with my brother (13m) she was expecting nothing to have changed but I didn't want to see her. I told my dad, who told his lawyer, who told the judge and the judge ordered therapy for me and my mom together to work it out. And right now that once a week therapy is the only time I see my mom.

My brother has to go to mom's house every other weekend despite not wanting to. Mom has told me this is because he sees my reaction and copies me and if I were to stop acting like she did anything bad to me and fixed our relationship she'd have both kids willingly in her life now.

In the almost year since we started therapy we have been to see three different therapists assigned by the same judge. The most recent one we just started having appointments with a month ago and it was suggested I engage just a little in therapy at some point to help get my point across directly to mom. I decided to do this after we switched. The new therapist didn't just ask dumb questions like the others about why I'm mad at my mom or why I don't want to forgive her.

Instead the therapist let mom do her talking which was all about how unfair this is. How she was always a great mom to me and my brother and how we should not be treating her different because of how her marriage ended. She never failed in her duty as a parent to the two of us and her heart is broken by the fact she can be so easily discarded. And how unfair she finds it that we won't give her AP a chance.

Then the therapist asked me if I had anything to say to the things my mom said and I told her I did. For the first time I said exactly how I felt and I told mom directly. I said that yes, mom cheated on dad and their relationship is their relationship. But I pointed out how cheating creates a broken home, one that is full of pain and anger and does damage that can't be brushed away. I pointed out that mom didn't think about me and my brother when she chose to betray dad and hurt him or the impact it would have on us to go from our parents together to mom being with someone else immediately.

I said people talk about how kids need time after divorce or death to adjust to the transition and cheating takes away from that because typically the people who had the affair move in together immediately and I said that happened here. I said I went from having a normal happy family to finding out it was not as happy as I expected because clearly mom wasn't happy. To then being told my parents were divorcing and realizing that my mom had hurt dad. And that mom expected me to live with her and the person she destroyed our family to be with.

I told my mom I don't see her the same way anymore. She's not someone to admire because she's not honest. She doesn't care about hurting the man who gave her two kids or hurting her two kids. I told her I would never want to be like her now. And that's hurtful to realize. I said she can talk all she wants about how she did nothing to us and the more she does the more she angers me because she did. She caused so much upheaval in our lives and expected us to just go with it. I told her the fact she expects me to be nice to Ron is insanity and that I felt like she was selfish for refusing to see why me and my brother would feel that way. I said she even wanted to blame me for my brother's feelings instead of herself.

I said so mom saying this never changed her parenting is wrong. I said it made her a worse parent because of everything I said. And I told my mom and the therapist that my view is pretty fucking set and I'm not open to seeing if it can change.

I took up the rest of our appointment so mom didn't get to address it but she looked mad.

AITA?

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/Ellf13 on 2025-06-02 20:01:37.

My ex and I have been divorced for 2 years. We have 2 kids (8m, 5f). Everything was great until our daughter was born, and then it’s like a switch flipped and he was a completely different person. I held out for as long as I could, but when he began an affair, I filed for divorce.

He fought me every step and it took over a year to finalize. During the divorce I was awarded primary custody. He was ordered to pay support, which he has never done. I don't need it, but it would be nice to have it to save for the kids, so I did sign up for enforcement. I don’t badger him about it - I know to him it’s a way to try to get me to talk to him, I just let enforcement do their thing. Since he’s so far behind, they have suspended just about everything they can. They send notices to him when this happens, but I’m sure he doesn’t open them.

I am a 1st gen American and most of my extended family still lives abroad. My grandmother recently passed away earlier this year and I decided I wanted to visit my family with my kids and see her resting place. Ex and I had some back and forth because I need permission from him to leave the country. He agreed but made a point to tell me that he feels now is a good time to take a vacation and that he was always planning to visit my family’s country. I was already anticipating this because following us is something he does EVERY time I take the kids on a trip. My lawyer drafted a document to be signed and notarized that I was being given permission to take our kids out of the country for the specific dates. She also included a clause that he has up until 72 hours prior to the day of travel to revoke his permission. He agreed.

The day arrives for us to leave, and I get to the airport with the kids 3 hours before our flight. Things go smoothly and I take the kids to a diner to grab some breakfast. Ex arrives much later, and as we’re finishing up I get a call from him. Turns out his passport was revoked due to lack of CS payment. He was denied at check in and there’s no way he can get his passport reinstated without paying his arrears in full.

He said that since he can’t go, he no longer gives me permission to take them. I reminded him that we are past the 72 hrs for him to deny my travel request. He said that he was going to inform an officer that I was trying to kidnap his children. I told him to do whatever he felt was necessary. Officers did show up at the gate to figure out what was going on - but I had the notarized agreement with me, so they sent us on our way.

He kept spamming my phone non stop until we got on the plane, where I was able to turn it off and get some peace for the flight. While we were in the air he called my brother to complain (we met through him and they’re still friends) and I have now been given an earful about how cruel it was for me to continue with the trip knowing he wouldn’t be able to follow us, and that I didn’t tell him on purpose. My mother told him to stay out of it and that it’s no longer my responsibility to remind him to open his mail - but some extended family agree with my brother.

I don’t think I’m the AH for continuing our trip; but I am questioning whether I’m an AH for not giving him a heads up that he should check his passport. I didn’t know it was revoked for sure, but I suspected. AITAH?

Edit to add because I keep seeing this and I can’t keep up with the comments! He can absolutely afford CS. He is self-employed (hence no garnishment unfortunately), but does well. Him not paying is solely a control tactic. He was NOT happy about the divorce. Now he does whatever he thinks will “punish” me for going through with it. That includes purposely withholding support. However, I make decent money (enough to pay bills, put a little savings away for the kids, and take them to do fun stuff a couple times a year) - so it really doesn’t affect me. He knows that the money would go right to the kids savings accounts, but expects me to beg him for it. Eventually it will catch up to him and he’ll have to pay it some way or other, it’s just him prolonging the inevitable and making things more difficult for himself.

Also, I don’t know why this isn’t clear (at least for 1 person that keeps falsely stating it over and over on different comments), but we were NOT going on vacation together. At all. Nothing was planned together. This was solely a trip for me and the kids. The document stated it was for me and the kids and that I would be taking full responsibility for them. It was not and never was a “WE” are taking the kids on vacation, that was made extremely clear to him and he understood. So him being unable to leave the country for HIS vacation, had absolutely no bearing on OUR trip as they were two distinctly separate travel arrangements.

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/mermaidpaint on 2025-06-02 02:21:12.

My (29M) cousin (26F) is currently in financial trouble because she moved into a house that is way out of her budget. She has no steady job, relies on odd jobs here and there, and has a terrible spending habit like, she buys $6 lattes every day and eats out constantly.

I warned her before she signed the lease that this place was too expensive, but she insisted she “deserved a nice place.” Fast forward three months, she can’t pay the rent. She’s now asking ME (who has my own bills, student loans, and rent to cover) for money “just until she gets back on her feet.”

I said no. I told her I love her, but I warned her from the start that this house was too expensive and I can’t be her safety net every time she makes a bad decision. She flipped out and called me a fake cousin, a snob, and said I was letting her “become homeless.”

Now her mom is calling me, saying I’m heartless and family should help each other. I feel like I’m being emotionally blackmailed for her financial irresponsibility.

AITA for refusing to cover the rent on a house I warned her she couldn’t afford?

The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/GamerGirlLex77 on 2025-06-01 20:33:20.