The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/hoginlly on 2025-06-06 08:02:41.
I'm new to my area and I have made friends with a few neighbors through a mommy and me group**.** I have been in the group now a little over a month and I have a 9 week old. I have a neighbor who is in the group and she asked me last week in an emergency if I could watch her 3 and 5 year old, she looked desperate so I agreed. I was like well its just once. I am a full-time SAHM and enjoy all my time with my little one. That day I watched her children was hectic as hell, my daughter was fussy and they children were very rambunctious to say the least. I was happy when she came and got them 6 hours later.
She came to me today saying she needed me to watch the kids in the afternoons, I told her no. I'm not a fulltime babysitter and have no desire to take that much time away from my own child and navigating life with my child and husband.
Her response was well its not like I'm asking a lot, its just the afternoons. I said it may not be a lot to her but it is a lot to me. My husband works from home and he needs the house quiet to work, and I'm a new mom and I'm not interested on taking on any other responsibilities other than what I have right now. She told me I was selfish, I told her she was entitled to think that I SHOULD help her just because I'm at home with my little one. AITAH for being so forward?
EDIT: So she went on the group chat trying to disparage me, saying I'm selfish blah blah blah. One of the mom's asked her why she felt I had a responsibility as a SAHM to watch her children? Then another mom confessed and reminded her in the group chat that she tried that with her and was told that the SAHM mom's in the group are not her babysitters and she needs to make arrangements for childcare independent of the group. She attempted to double down then the moderator/ creator of the group told her it would might be best if she found another mom group to socialize with. Then she back-tracked and apologized. I was separately contacted by the moderator and told that if she contacts me or another mom for this reason again she will be expelled from the group.
I want to thank all of you for your support and understanding my concerns. I'm navigating this and trying to figure out this new life. A year ago I was a college student hanging out with my fiancé (now husband) and now I'm a mom and a wife in a new part of the country. So its a lot of adjusting. Thank you for your help.