The original post: /r/ohnoconsequences by /u/advocatesparten on 2025-06-25 14:03:10.
My mom cheated on her ex-husband which made him leave her. I was born from the affair and her ex-husband wanted nothing to do with me, which I so get! I do! They had four kids together who were 7 to 14 when I (17F) was born. My mom made me think he was my dad for years and she tried to get him to take care of me and she got even pushier with it because their kids rejected me. They rejected her too but me as well. And worse than mom really.
She'd try to force her ex and his family-like his parents and siblings- to interact with me. That was for her other kids' sports games and stuff. She'd drag me and she'd try to sit with them and she'd try to lead conversations. All it did was make me feel like shit because he couldn't hide his disgust for me and his family didn't hide theirs either.
Another thing is my name. She gave me an Italian first name to go with our Italian last name, which is her ex's last name. Two of their other kids have Italian names he chose and the other two had non-Italian names chosen by mom. She has admitted she wanted to try and shame him into taking care of me. And she has used my name to try and make it believable that he's my real dad. Not just with me but with other people. She would say he was my dad and abandoned me because I was so young and he wanted to be done with her faster.
When her other kids stopped talking to her she would take me to her ex's house and fuss at him for letting me get left behind. Sometimes when she did that the police were called. Other times him and their kids would stand there arguing and over and over I was called the affair kid and it got to me. I cried at times and even then my mom would stand there and argue.
My mom did give up but she still tells people I'm his and she even said I have his name and my first name is one he chose, from his culture and his family and stuff. It bothers me so much that she won't let it die. I have no extended family in my life either. I don't know mom's family and I never could find my dad online, if that's even the right guy she gave me the name of (eventually).
She's moped about her kids not talking to her and how she's a grandma and doesn't know her grandkids and how most of her kids have left her. She told me we should be closer but I act like I don't like her. I asked her how she could be surprised and I can't wait to leave her without all of her kids. I said she doesn't deserve to have me stick around when she uses me as a pawn. She got really mad and yelled at me. She pointed out how she's all I have which is true.
AITA?