cross-posted from: https://lemmy.eco.br/post/13362665
If a woman compliments me I'll assume she wants to harvest my kidneys.
this post was submitted on 21 May 2025
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Train of thought always goes:
Am I about to be robbed? Does she want me to sign up to something? Are my kidneys still there?
Maybe, maybe, yes for now.
I bought a guy flowers once and he was beaming with joy
Probably the first time anyone had made that kind of gesture to him.
^ ^
(*. u.*) me
. .
. .
. .
At this point, if someone complements me, my first thought is "Well that's a fucking lie, they want something".
I reckon it's pretty universally human to appreciate validation in any form.
Yeah, say literally anything nice about me and it makes my day better. And I'm just a regular dude, I've got a pretty good life, but compliments are awesome. A compliment complements a nice day really well, and can help to turn a bad day around.
Oddly enough, I also like giving them. It's all good.
I was playing some drinking game with a few of my friends a couple months ago and one of the cards resulted in me having to take my shirt off, ever since then 2 of them have been gassing me up about what good shape I'm in and mentioning it to the rest of them about how I'm in good shape. I don't work out to get compliments but I'd be lying if I said my self esteem hasn't gone through the roof since this started.
I just got back from a doc visit for a shoulder injury. They told me "yea sometimes muscular guys like you fool us and we miss a tear because their delts are overcompensating"
All I heard was "you're muscular", going to be riding that high for a bit. Luckily no rotator cuff tear, probably just a bad sprain, will be back to bench press soon enough
'Guys don't need validation'?
Bish some girl in the 90s told me I looked good in black and it informed every single clothes purchase I have made since
A PTA mom in the '90s told me she would kill for my hair and I've kept it long ever since
... because you wanted to have your hair stolen off your corpse, by her?
What, you just go through life not daring people to try it? His long hair says: "See what happens. I dare you."
Not quite, but now I think I realize why I've got a thing for milves.
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I need it, desperately. My gf knows this, pays me compliments, and every single one is a core memory for me. Also working out and getting a bit swole means you get a lot of compliments from the boys, which is also nice.
I try and compliment my husband often! He is bad at accepting compliments so I keep trying!
That is awesome! And he doesn't need to accept it for it to be good for him. Exposure is often highly influential.
Total bullshit, I remember a compliment about my hair from 25 years ago
Uh... did you read the comic or are you commenting purely on the title?
I interpret it as "we (men) need no external validation, but it's nice to get". However, I argue that we do need external validation and denying that is toxic masculinity.
Dudes complimenting dudes. It doesn't have to be weird. If you see a dude in a cool shirt or whatever, just say "hey thats a cool shirt."
Nice dick bro
lol I told some of my coworkers, "how're you doing you beautiful man" ... they're like, "thank you for saying that"
of course, you have to have a certain relationship where it doesn't come off too weird but dudes complimenting dudes should be normalised.
I wonder if dudes complimenting other dudes mainly applies to like "skills". Like you're a great fisherman or driver or coder or something. I wonder if those are more typical?
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Gotta meet somewhere in the middle. Men stop catcalling women, and women give men more compliments, but men need to stop raping women first.
This is part of the reason why I don't compliment men. The first part is I'm just shy as fuck when it comes to complimenting anybody and will literally flounder in my mind about whether to say it or not, only for the person to walk away. ~mission~ ~failed~
But the other half is not wanting to seem like I'm hitting on a man, because then if he harasses/pesters me, he'll think he's justified because I gave him a compliment so obviously I must wanna fuck him...
But yeah I'll be thinking, "his fashion is so good!" or "that cologne smells nice!" or "I love that tshirt!" but then I worry about coming off the wrong way, so I don't say anything...
Yeah. We need to teach our boys not to assume somebody is hitting on them and that they are not entitled to a person’s body, affection or attention. Then women will feel more comfortable displaying their feelings and men won’t have to worry so much about missing signs.
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Well, lets be honest.
Men in general do not put any (or at least as much) work in their appearance as women. When was the last time you or any man you know took over an hour to get ready because they were doing their skin routine?
There is definitely a significant cultural influence on this, obviously starting at a young age.
But as someone who did put an effort into their appearance during my college days, women did notice.
My niece has been getting heavily into skincare. As long as we're being honest, most of a typical "skincare routine" is placebo, and some of it is actively counter-productive. I know a few women who have a laissez-faire approach to skincare, and their results are almost as good. I believe that the routine is more about the ritual, and psychic need to try to gain some measure of control in a crazy society, than results.
Boys are wecking their bodies because we have convinced ourselves that looking like Thor is normal
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well the recent explosion of barbershops all around my country tell a different story
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