The original post: /r/amitheasshole by /u/RandomRamblings99 on 2025-04-16 13:22:58.
I [25F] have been friends with this person [24F] since we were 10 years old. We have what I've always seen as a playful friendship, she teases me and I teases her, but its meant in good fun.
This following bit I'm fully the asshole in. I didn't mean to be, but I fully accept that I was. We've been planning to see a band and she wanted to do matching outfits, which I said might look at a bit silly. She snapped at me that I "didn't have to fucking join in then". I laughed and said "okay, what outfit ideas do you have. I'm open to anything" hoping this would make it clear that it wasn't an attack. However, I received a long paragraph telling me that she was sick of me, that I talk down to her, that she only hasn't said anything to keep peace in the friendship group. I instantly apologised, letting her know that I didn't realise my playful jabs were actually offensive (I'm not great with tone) and didn't intend them that way, but that I'm really sorry that they were.
Now this is where I need advice. Again, I know I'm the asshole in calling the outfit idea silly. However, now she's completely blanking me. Ignoring messages and very clearly responding to everyone else in our shared friends group chat while acting like I haven’t said anything. Being actively ignored stresses and upsets me for reasons I've discussed with her in the past. It's been four days. I'm considering asking that, considering how much I've upset her, i don't go to this event. It was going to be us, one shared friend, and a group of her friends, so she would still be able to go. I'll ask that she sell the tickets (it's a sell out event so this shouldn't be an issue), give me the money I sent to her for the tickets, and keep the profit. If there's no profit I'll eat the cost. Would I be an immature asshole if I asked this.
TLDR: WIBTA for dropping out of an event after an argument where I unintentionally offended a friend and am now being ignored as a result