2meirl4meirl

We keep asking why the average individuals mental health is on the decline and this is a big part of it.

Some of us have been doing this since we were children, replacing work with school. The only way you can manage all of this is by multitasking everywhere possible. You only socialize while at work or school, and all the while you're probably either working on something or you're on your phone. You clean and tidy at the same time as you cook. You speedrun your showers, a time that should be somewhat relaxing.

Even assuming you do actually get those full precious 8 hours of sleep, your brain isn't going to be rested enough.

I commute to work on foot while meditating.
Buy food on the walk home, and cook it while I socialize with my hoover.
I eat in the shower with my clothes on to avoid laundry, and I get 8 hours of sleep at work.

That way I can squeeze 2 full time jobs into one day and don't need a car, so I can afford to pay rent.

Let's see. Earn a living, take care of yourself, take care of your household, and add in taking care of other people. That is only like four full time jobs.

This is because domestic labor, which allows for social reproduction, is unvalued and not compensated.

Don’t get old. It’s worse.

Even my sims couldn't keep up

Don't forget about your 30 minutes+ of being relaxed and mindful

I think we should get better at budgeting our work time.

It may sound daunting at first but when you want to work eight hours, first think : "can I afford this eight hours of work? Shouldn't I rather be playing Monster Hunter?" and take good habits from there.

Maybe in the beginning try working 5 or 6 hours. Don't rush it, but keep your determination.

You'll slowly begin to perceive more opportunities as you grow in focus : "Instead of working another hour for my boss, I'll write my own TTRPG setting or hit that solo queue".

It's hard at first but others made it. Why wouldn't you?

You can chose two. Any two, but only two.

The trick is to not actually work for 8hrs, easier said than done of course, but if you find yourself in that position then take full advantage of it. They won’t bat an eye to replace you, so don’t bat an eye to do your own thing where possible.

Dermatologists have confirmed many, many times that a daily shower is unnecessary for healthy skin. Hair experts also don't recommend a daily shampoo for most people.

That said... it can be hard to tell when you stink (olfactory saturation / incrementalism)... so I don't actually have a shower schedule recommendation.

Now add to that

• dripping and picking up the kids from school
• dressing them up for school
• cooking dinner for them and coaching after them
• giving them a bath
• putting them to need and reading them a story
• ACTUALLY SPENDING TIME AND PLAY WITH THEM

How is that even possible? No wonder that people are having less kids

It was almost manageable when I worked from home everyday. No chance now

Something has to give. It’s not possible to do everything every day.

As a parent of 2, I wish my daily routine was this simple!

The joys of living alone... I can live like a raccoon at a trash dump without anyone to judge.

My self-expectations go waaaaaay up as soon as someone is planning to visit/stayover. Laundry once every 3 weeks vs. twice a week, vacuum once a week versus every other day, wash up once or twice a week (by hand) vs. 3 times a day, throw out trash and recycling as infrequently as twice monthly (I do not produce that much waste at home) vs. every day (because of getting takeout more often). I do shower daily, before anyone accuses me of being filthy around other people.

Break it out into 168 hours per week:

56 hours of sleep
45 hours of work (include the potential for working a bit longer each day)
5 hours of commuting to/from work
6 hours of exercise/gym
2 hours of grocery shopping
7 hours of cooking and other food prep
7 hours of eating
1 hour of laundry
2 hours of general cleaning around the house
2 hours of other general chores

That's 133 hours per week. You still have 35 hours for socializing, hobbies, other activities you enjoy, or just plain sitting around and relaxing (with a book, with TV, etc.) if you enjoy that. And some people can fit in part of those needs in terms of overlap: white collar jobs that don't mind if you buy something for yourself online during the day, restaurant jobs that cover a shift meal, physical jobs or commutes that reduce the amount of time you might need to get exercise outside of work, etc.

For me, I actually really enjoy cooking (and eating) so I probably spend more time on those than is strictly necessary, but it doesn't feel like work to me.

I'm probably lucky in that I spent some time working in restaurants that gave me a ton of kitchen skills (not just the actual ability to prep and cook delicious food quickly, but the sense of meal planning on a strict budget that reduces food waste), and makes me appreciate the regularity of a white collar job schedule that actually fits with circadian rhythms and the flow of the rest of society.

Kids make it harder, though. A lot of that 35 hours per week carved out gets totally eaten up with a second commute to daycare (5 hours), bedtime routines (7 hours), extracurricular weekend activities (5 hours), and extra cleaning (5 hours), a second load of laundry (1 hour), and extra chores (2 hours), leaving you with only 10 hours per week of hobbies/leisure.

At that point you've gotta find the time from somewhere. I personally dipped to 7 hours per ~~week~~ day of sleep around that time, dropped my gym attendance to around 3 hours per week, and started paying to outsource some of the cleaning (a weekly service) and cooking (more takeout/restaurants) and shopping (more grocery delivery).

But the magic, for me, was that my kids are really fun. They leave me with less time for other things but I love them and that part feels less like a chore. And they're a forcing function in that I have to be home when they're asleep 3-4 hours before my bedtime, when I don't have anything better to do than clean a bit, do a bit of meal prep, and watch a lot of TV with my spouse.

Half of those aren't daily

I work, sleep, eat (but I don’t waist time cooking) and drop all the rest because neurodivergent burnout is real and I don’t want to go die from exhaustion .

It is impossible. You never get to be on top of everything. Since there is always shit that needs to be done. It is often called the productivity myth. More discipline or a better system won’t lead to less work and less stress. Since new things just keep coming.

You just need to accept that life is like this and that it’s completely impossible to forever finish your todos. So therefore you should just schedule down time and don’t feel guilty that you still need to finish things since it is a never ending stream of things to do anyway. Just prioritize the most important things.

The 10k steps you do them while doing the other stuff lmao

Meal prep can help shift some of that burden as long as there is fridge/freezer space for some of the elements.