this post was submitted on 20 Dec 2024
229 points (98.7% liked)

Out of Context Comics

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Comic panels taken out of comics so we can make fun of them!! We love the golden age stuff!

Rules:

  1. Comics must come from actual comic books. No AI or Photoshops.

  2. Single panels are preferred.

  3. Comics should be unintentionally funny. Spider-man cracking wise is not what this is about.

  4. Don't be a dick.

  5. I can't believe I've had to add this... NO RACISM.

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[–] [email protected] 52 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 35 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

It's a thing. There's a reason you don't see it very often anymore, though.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 weeks ago

A Superman endorsement of, "hey, it's better than a mug of every deadly microbe," sealed its fate.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I don't know, if you get it from an old fashioned soda fountain sort of place, it really isn't too bad. I just think it's one of those things that probably isn't all that good when mass-produced.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I once tried to carbonate my own chocolate soda by putting a yoo-hoo through the knock off soda stream.

The results were... Well, I don't use the words "made of Satan's smegma" lightly, but I imagine that's about what it's like.

I did enjoy the one I got at the old school pharmacy soda fountain, though. That was good.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Adding the spicy tang of carbonation to chocolate milk takes a very special mind.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 weeks ago

I thought it would maybe be like a chocolate soda since yoo-hoo is basically just water and chocolate syrup

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 weeks ago

I tried it once. Never again.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I'd guess kind of like an egg cream, which is a drink containing neither eggs nor cream.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 weeks ago

Incidentally, if you want a drink made with eggs and cream, get eggnog.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Superman steps into highway traffic. Cars swerve and crash around him. A truck jack-knifes around him like a fulcrum and explodes into itself. A school bus crammed with children plows headfirst into his chest and comes to an immediate halt. Superman turns around a fixes you with a knowing smile.

Car insurance salesman: "Y-you've proven it, Superman..... you've proven it...."

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 weeks ago

Superman dives headfirst into the lava plug of a supervolcano, the impact causing the plug to crack and crumble, releasing thousands of years of volcanic pressure. Lava spews miles into the air, the caldera itself collapsing as, after thousands of years of erosion, the plug was the only thing still holding it up. The lava runs like oil on water, engulfing everything it touches. No one is safe, no one survives. Children scream as their flesh melts. Lovers hold one another as the ash smothers them alive. Pets asphyxiate from the toxic gasses. Vehicles melt. Homes burn. The cloud of ash ascends to the heavens and God weeps as volcanic winter sets in; causing famine and mass starvation as crops can no longer grow under the limited sunlight and frigid temperatures. A mass extinction event is triggered. Half of the extant species die as the perpetual winter disrupts their natural food chains and causes them to starve or freeze. Superman climbs out of the volcano to face his challenger, somehow miraculously still standing in the midst of the chaos. He puts on his most charming, charismatic grin.

Home insurance salesman: "Y-you've proven it, Superman..... you've proven it...."

[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I have a pitcher of that too. I should really clean the fridge.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

Is it better or worse than chocolate soda?

[–] AwesomeLowlander 12 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Assuming the word spreads, he probably saves more time by doing this than by saying no to a million insurance agents.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

It's just... some of those are airborne. If it's every deadly microbe.

[–] AwesomeLowlander 17 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Yeah, but that's not HIS problem.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Until you get recombinants with his Kryptonian gut flora and he farts out the Andromeda Strain

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 weeks ago

Until you get recombinants with his Kryptonian gut flora and he farts out the Andromeda Strain

Pure poetry.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

His anatomy kills them.

Even Supermans internal gut microbes are super compared to ours.

[–] AwesomeLowlander 9 points 3 weeks ago

Something to consider - does every insurance policy sold in Metropolis come with an 'Act of Superheroism' clause?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Why does he need to drink a concoction of deadly microbes? Is he trying to be a “super spreader”?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 weeks ago

I guess to prove he doesn't need to be insured against wiping out all of humanity with a global pandemic?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Chocolate soda, as the name suggests, is a carbonated beverage with a distinct chocolate flavor. It is typically made by combining chocolate syrup, soda water, and sometimes a hint of vanilla or other flavorings.

So like a cold fizzy and viscous chocolate milk.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago

That sounds as good as chocolate pizza. Bad

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

I wonder if Big Clive has tried to carbonate chocolate beverages in his SodaStream

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago

To further prove his point, Superman goes on to cough in the insurance adjuster's face