11: Your hairdresser is unlikely to be bitten by ticks or fleas that are hidden in your hair.
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You don’t know me!
Yeah, but human groomers have to deal with lice. So much worse.
I bite all my hair dressers.
I pee on mine to assert dominance.
Some of them might like that (̆̈ ̆̈̆̈͡°̆̈ ̆̈̆̈͜ʖ̆̈ ̆̈̆̈͡°̆̈)̆̈
Only way to get a good haircut really
The likelihood of you pooping on the hairdresser is pretty slim.
... but never zero.
My groomer spends like 4 hours on my dog. She definitely under charges, because 4 hours with my hairdresser would cost thrice as much.
Thinking of it that way makes me feel a little better about how much I pay to groom my dogs. I spend about $50 for my own haircut and it takes about half an hour. My dog takes about 4 hours to groom and I do not pay $200 for it (little closer to that number than I would prefer, but that groomer is worth her weight in gold dealing with my big fluff balls).
Yeah my groomer is amazing. My dog is more than a handful, and he adores her. She does such a good job and takes so much time dealing with him.
Sadly we’re moving soon so we’ll no longer be able to go to her. Been working on getting him accustomed to me doing stuff, and he’s gotten so much better over the years.
He’s a rescue and he absolutely refused to even let anyone touch him behind his shoulders when we got him. Now I can even massage his back feet.
Couple of weeks ago I managed to clip all his nails by myself for the first time. Absolutely magical. 😭
Aw, it's too bad your dog can't keep the same groomer. Mine are in love with theirs as well.
I think they should've added in brackets with the second point saying "hopefully"
Number 1 is why I cut my own hair now.
Did you shit on your hairdresser???
You... don't???
Oh like you never have.
I try but I always miss a few hairs.
I knew a person that had a Samoyed for which a simple bath was a two person, 4 hour endeavour, from start to finish, not including the initial chase and wrestle to get the dog in the bathtub.
The person had the groomers go to their house, where he had the bathtub already setup in the garage and all necessary towels and other assorted equipment.
The part of actually gettting the dog in the bathtub involved three person, with the dog's guardian starting to chase the dog around the property from early in the morning, as the dog would do his best to hide, run and stay out of reach of human hands when the bathtub was set on the garage.
The grooming session would be anything between €80 to €100, in 2008, and still the person thought it was cheap.
For all the work invested yeah that sounds cheap...
Although I wonder if there had been a better way to deal with this so the dog isn't so against it, afraid of it or whatever the issue was....
The dog loved his bath but also loved to get everybody pissed off. It was a very stupid game of catch the dog played.
For the time, it wasn't cheap.
In 2008, here, the minimum wage was €426, so about €2,42 an hour. So €100 for 4 hours of work was a very good pay.
Regarding the last one: You speak for yourself.
Slim, but not zero!
Why is the numbering backwards?
Because it is a top ten. The top most point is usually the punch line/most important. Hence you put it at the end to build Suspence.
I'm doing it all wrong--I need to start seeing a pet groomer.
I plan on making the joke next time I’m in, see how it lands.
The wife is a dog groomer.... ohhhhh boy the horror stories and pictures I get on the fucking DAILY.
BRUSH. YOUR. FUCKING. DOGS. OCCASIONALLY.
I paid $600 to have my dog’s teeth deep-cleaned and definitely had a similar though to this lol
Vets and groomers are wonderful
Same here. I have a female bichon frise and I had no idea the teeth near the mustache tend to go bad along with the hip joints.
My dog is going to need this before too long and our estimate was more in the range of $1,000 (large dog, needs more anesthesia, costs more). Not looking forward to it!
Kinda makes a fella wonder, I'm not asking any questions.
I will never understand why people economically disadvantage themselves by spending so much money on a freaking dog. Imagine not progressing in life because you had to spend $2000+/yr on dog grooming... Fucking insanity, I swear.
Progressing to where? Wherever you are in life? Hard pass.