this post was submitted on 18 Nov 2024
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[–] [email protected] 298 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Ballet stars, and their notoriously poor balance.

[–] [email protected] 46 points 1 month ago (1 children)

He seems to have astonishing balance for someone with one leg

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[–] [email protected] 179 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Stay on the ground floor, Russians.

[–] [email protected] 54 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Heart attacks happens on every floor.

[–] [email protected] 44 points 1 month ago (1 children)

So do poisonings, and shootings but we're just mitigating circumstances here lol.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

There could always be a feral bullet that has ran away from it's gun!

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 month ago

"Tragically fell from the ground floor balcony and landed on two bullets to the back of the head."

[–] [email protected] 174 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (4 children)

A nice window to the future for US citizens critical of their government... a window ripe for defenestration...

If I die mysteriously from a fall, please refer to this comment.

[–] [email protected] 79 points 1 month ago (7 children)

Actually you will probably die in a Tesla whose doors do not open https://www.msn.com/en-gb/news/world/friends-trapped-in-tesla-burned-to-death-when-electronic-doors-failed-to-open-after-crash/ar-AA1tWPYH

Or which just hits you: https://www.washingtonpost.com/technology/2023/06/10/tesla-autopilot-crashes-elon-musk/

I mean now where Teslas are probably the next mandatory car for state officials. And after some "Think Tank" will be pretty sure that all the saftey fuss about autopilots is bad for the economy.

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[–] whyNotSquirrel 128 points 1 month ago (2 children)

They don't have any budget to do it differently or it's a power move, like, it's not official but you know it?

[–] [email protected] 181 points 1 month ago (4 children)

It's a calling card. Everyone knows what happened, not a single soul will comment on it. Unless they fancy being the next up for flight lessons.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago

I wonder how Red Bull sales are in Russia.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago (2 children)

What do you think Trump's calling card will be? McDonalds induced heart attack?

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 month ago

Government issued tesla drove into a lake and drowned the occupants.

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[–] [email protected] 118 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 month ago

"haha no problem, this is polonium tea"

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

don't worry this is just normal tea I offer before I throw you off building

[–] [email protected] 99 points 1 month ago (20 children)
[–] [email protected] 40 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

You're just blessed enough not to recognize gallows humor. We're actually jealous of you.

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[–] [email protected] 86 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I mean ballet dancers are known for being klutzy and prone to tripping over their own feet. Right?

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[–] [email protected] 63 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I imagine Russia is like the Star Wars setting, lots of crazy steep drops and they never install railings.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago (6 children)

The platform where Darth Vader confronts Luke has railings, so they clearly have the parts, tools, and a guy who installs them. Maybe he's just held up on Level B?

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[–] Imgonnatrythis 63 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Russia be slippery. My heart goes out to these rare brave souls in a land of cowards.

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[–] [email protected] 52 points 1 month ago (2 children)

In another article emergency services responded with this gem.

He died a natural death. It’s not a crime.

should we be worried

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago (3 children)

cause of death: the natural impact of cement on the body experienced after a perfectly natural fall

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[–] [email protected] 49 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (5 children)

This just piles up on the reasons Russia needs to be denuclearisased, putin getting ousted, democracy installed and so on.

Good news Russias economy is in the toilet and someone has started flushing already, Ukrain will prevail and hopefully we'll have peace one day.

[–] [email protected] 51 points 1 month ago (9 children)

More realistically, he'll probably die of old age or be ousted by someone younger and more exciting to the wealthy elite that keep Putin in power. Real change may come after that, but a change in leadership is not going to immediately fix long term issues like corruption, wealth disparity, etc.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I think they will become a Chinese vassal.

I don't know exactly what that'd look like, but the pure economic/political dynamics make it seem kinda inevitable.

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[–] [email protected] 44 points 1 month ago (1 children)

"in an apparent suicide, putin critic ________ shot himself in the back 20 times. more at 11"

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 month ago (2 children)

He's gonna do it again at 11? Damn, that's super sus.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago

Gotta give him time to reload.

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[–] [email protected] 44 points 1 month ago (5 children)
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[–] [email protected] 43 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (8 children)

So many people fall from their windows or balconies in Russia that I am surprised they are still legal

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Someone pushed for a new law outlawing them, but the efforts ended after he accidentally fell off a balcony to his death.

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago (6 children)

It's to make the point that they were murdered. It's a fear tactic with plausible deniability.

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[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 month ago (2 children)

How long before windows make it to the statistics of average deaths per-year in Russia?

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[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Again? That's another reason to uninstall all windows. Especially in Russia.

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago

They really could use some railings over there.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

As far as I read, he had a ~~leg~~ spinal injury and an operation scheduled (bad stuff for a ballet dancer - you can't work with an injured ~~leg~~ spine) and was experiencing difficulties with alcohol and painkillers (the latter for the injury). He might have felt that his career was doomed.

As far as I read, he called his girlfriend (or maybe ex-wife, as the article suggests) and asked her to visit him. When she arrived, he had already fallen.

He was characterized as optimistic and nobody had noticed a death wish. Then again, during injury, pain, inability to work, (self-)medication and maybe withdrawal symptoms, other people's predictions of character may not entirely apply to every person.

The balcony was described as not the safest place on Earth. It doesn't require a detective to suspect that being under the influence of strong painkillers might increase the risk.

He can't be characterized as an opposition figure, or a figure of power. There is no clear beneficiary or motive.

As for war and statements against it - he was an artist, a dancer in a publicly funded theatre, and limited by that in what he could say without losing his job. Since it seems that he had reasonable political opinions, inability to voice them without experiencing retribution probably didn't make him cheerful.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)
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