I'm Dr. Sharkzo and I like cocaaaaine.
(I understand this reference might be a bit old for most of the platform but if you're unfamiliar with it just browse some clips of Dr. Rockso)
this post was submitted on 23 Jul 2024
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Ca-Ca-Ca YEEAAAHHH, baby...
Metalocalypse isn't old, it only came out... 18 years ago... damnit
There is a person somewhere who just finished their SATs and was conceived to... DUNCAN HILLS COFFEE
So much cocaine...
A coo-coo-coo-coo!!!
Cocaine shark do do do do do do
That song has to be a by-product of cocaine use
"jar jar binks has a caribbean black accent"
I assume Cocaine Shark is already a movie on Tubi, but if it isn't give it a couple weeks.
It's a movie produced in 2023: https://m.imdb.com/title/tt27036391/
Shockingly, it's not made by The Asylum.
I'm kind of impressed. I've never seen a 1.8 imdb rating before
Nice. And yeah, it's on Tubi. I think it can be properly reclassified as a documentary given this article here.
And if you think that one's scary, wait until you see Cocaine Pangolin.
An explosion at a lab lets loose onto the streets an army of mutated, murderous sharks and other creatures injected with a potent new stimulant.
New? What about all those bricks floating out there? I'm kinda thinking they should redo that description. They could do a whole series of movies about orca whales maybe they'd be less pissed if they weren't eating so much cocaine instead of the bricks of weed
I get it it's a B movie and all...
Is that the sequel to Cocaine Bear? Where the sharks start swimming up rivers and they release the bear to fight the shark.
Like a Godzilla movie?
First off, I get pretty serious about Godzilla movies, so we'll leave that alone out of common decency.
Second, the movie you're describing is a franchise crossover between Cocaine Bear and Cocaine Shark. I heard they're bringing Meth Moose in for the follow up.
Only in the genre, not in the same league.
Also…. Meth Moose?? That’s actually a movie I’d watch.
It looks like there are a few meth gator movies out there, but nobody's done a moose yet. If I were any kind of ambitious I might get that copyrighted. Fair game if anyone wants to use it though; I'd watch it too.
There’s probably some Hollywood script writer taking notes about to run off to the nearest LLM to slap prompts into.
Then they're gonna do a cross over event where they introduce Ganja Goose
Let them fight
Does that mean they're banned from the Olympics?
No, they just can’t compete under the shark flag
How can a shark even do cocaine without a blowhole?
Through the gills
There are the real questions.
Mabes they like feeling on their gums
They are doing numbies like you wouldn't believe
I didn't even know there were that many sharks
...And my guy can't find shit.
Jaws 8 won't be so bad because his crippling coke addiction has ground all his teeth to nubs.
Brazilian snowpowder, works on people, works on sharks. Wonder what else it'll work on.