988
Checkmate (slrpnk.net)
submitted 4 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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[-] [email protected] 237 points 4 weeks ago
  1. Friend makes a company named say "Morgan defence ltd" and you sing an NDA with your friend not to talk about your 2 year beer holiday on the beach.

  2. Company checks our your story. Friend's company looks like a typical defence industry shell company with no history of anything.

  3. Job

[-] [email protected] 94 points 4 weeks ago

You can skip that and say I was defense consultant with an NDA and cannot disclose which organisation I worked for

[-] [email protected] 46 points 4 weeks ago

"But you are an English major"

[-] zalgotext 71 points 4 weeks ago

"Please stop asking questions, for both your safety and mine"

[-] [email protected] 32 points 4 weeks ago

"Yes, I had to correspond with other engineers and English was used in all communications."

[-] [email protected] 18 points 4 weeks ago

It was in fact the major form of communication!

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[-] [email protected] 9 points 4 weeks ago

I cannot confirm nor deny my rank

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[-] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago

"And you're trying to get a job at an arby's?"

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[-] [email protected] 123 points 4 weeks ago

Wait is his chest censored

[-] [email protected] 88 points 4 weeks ago

I'm also noticing a disappointing lack of giant blue dong

[-] [email protected] 36 points 4 weeks ago

I don’t swing that way but it’s truly unfortunate 😔

[-] [email protected] 17 points 4 weeks ago

He's just not whole without the blue kielbasa.

...like Kool aid with no sugar, ham with no burger!

[-] [email protected] 4 points 4 weeks ago

If you've seen the film, it will do all the swinging for you.

[-] [email protected] 6 points 4 weeks ago

Something was clearly wrong with this picture.

[-] [email protected] 29 points 4 weeks ago

No. Just rendered by a PS1

[-] [email protected] 8 points 4 weeks ago

Makes sense

[-] [email protected] 15 points 4 weeks ago

It kinda looks like there was text someone removed

[-] [email protected] 10 points 4 weeks ago

Can't have those man nipples.

[-] [email protected] 99 points 4 weeks ago

Did….did you censor dr manhattans male presenting nipples?

[-] [email protected] 8 points 4 weeks ago

Is he even male anymore? I thought that was more like a dead sex to him since he was AMAB but is now a god.

[-] [email protected] 23 points 4 weeks ago

Biologically and functionally speaking, he's whatever and everything. Practically speaking, he chooses to have a dick and look like a big muscular man that looks nothing like his previous form (so its even more deliberate), so it seems the only thing that survived his ascention was his gender identity.

[-] [email protected] 77 points 4 weeks ago

I was working at K-mart as a regional manager making 80k a year. Good luck verifying that.

[-] [email protected] 36 points 4 weeks ago

I was a senior project manager at Twitter

[-] [email protected] 24 points 4 weeks ago
[-] flambonkscious 10 points 4 weeks ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago)

Nice counter...

Now get off my lawn!

/s

[-] [email protected] 32 points 4 weeks ago

Shouldn't his answer be "Yes. I signed an NDA."?

[-] kambusha 30 points 4 weeks ago

Yes, no, I don't know. Could you repeat the question?

[-] [email protected] 18 points 4 weeks ago

Would you please be the boss of me now?

[-] kambusha 7 points 4 weeks ago
[-] [email protected] 6 points 4 weeks ago

And you're not so big

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[-] [email protected] 8 points 4 weeks ago

Also, shouldn't they mention that in the resume?

[-] [email protected] 31 points 4 weeks ago

Rule # 1 of signing an NDA: you're not allowed to say that you signed an NDA.

[-] [email protected] 19 points 3 weeks ago

Even if you don't mention who you signed it with? There's quite a bit difference between saying "I've signed NDA" and "I've signed NDA with company (name)"

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[-] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago

Actual Rule #1 of signing an NDA: unless you work on Defense, NDAs are virtually unenforceable

[-] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago

This is really fucking terrible advice.

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[-] [email protected] 22 points 4 weeks ago

I just tell them I was in and out of rehab.

[-] agentshags 11 points 4 weeks ago
[-] [email protected] 18 points 4 weeks ago

Isn't it normally part of an NDA to not being able to admit you signed one.

[-] snugglesthefalse 54 points 4 weeks ago

Not normally, that wouldn't make much sense. It's easier to just say you signed an NDA and anyone with sense knows you're not allowed to talk about the work.

[-] [email protected] 21 points 4 weeks ago

It's about Disclosure not Admittance. That would be a NAA.

When asked your say: NAA...

[-] [email protected] 23 points 4 weeks ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago)

Unless you're Bruce Wayne, in which case when asked you might say NA NA-NA NA-NA NA-NA NA....

I'll see myself out.

[-] can 15 points 4 weeks ago
[-] Jocker 13 points 4 weeks ago

"Yes, but then I'll have to kill you"

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this post was submitted on 17 Jun 2024
988 points (99.1% liked)

Memes

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