196

Ecological warfare on a planet-wide scale

I didn't get arrested, because I suffer from a knee injury and my adventures have ended

Possession of psychite with intention to distribute

and like, at least 3 or 4 warcrimes, but whose counting

Rotting in a Shinra prison for bombing a Mako reactor. In my defense, the new explosion graphics were great.

Climbing a mountain but dying too much along the way. Like a little too much.

Having eleven kings in one poker hand.

Stealing villager's beds.

Supporting democracy!

Mining rocks and killing bugs. Hey we all gotta make a living

Throwing a stick of dynamite into the middle of a kkk meeting outside of Rhodes. Sorry, not sorry.

Using obscene amounts of violence to protect freedom and democracy across the galaxy.

Forcing thousands of grandmother's into endless work. Destroying ecosystems. Ravaging planets. Ending light itself. Enslaving Gods. And eliminating every parallel world in existence. All to make cookies. More and more. On and on and on. Universes of cookies more numerous than atoms in the cosmos.

But I'm almost done.

Gambling fraud. I keep playing 5 of a kind Flush in Balanto and it keeps working!

Genocide

Unlicensed space travel

Elden Ring... soo.. lots of murder

Driving a giant tractor with a trailer full of soybeans the wrong way around a roundabout to deliver the soybeans to the grocery store.

Been playing Dorfromantik so building quaint, idyllic villages with expansive forests and streams.

Disregarding all Osha violations, colonizing a planet and killing all natural life.

damm I love factorio

PC: Politely asking for and engaging in street fights with random strangers.

Mobile: Baking cookies

Web: Making paperclips

Uh...is travelling through time and mass exterminating purple lovecraftian monsters with my pet bird a crime? Because if not, I got nothin

Killing Nazis

Good thing I don’t have to worry about that ever happening IRL…

Demolishing robots with a magnetic guitar-sword in beat with my rock playlist that plays in my heart.🤘

Genociding an entire planet, making said planet implode.

Driving a truck without a license and transporting goods incorrectly declared (Euro Truck Simulator 2)

RimWorld... I'm not the type for cannibalism or human skin hats, but I do produce and sell a shitload of cocaine.

Oh, and I killed a child colonist, in this run. There was a bug in her age-up event, and the game would not let me proceed until she was... removed. I hate killing children, but since it was the end of the world without doing so, I give myself a pass this time

Osha violations (Portal 2)

Running a 75 ton Timberwolf Battlemech.

Pretty sure just turning the thing on would be enough to get me arrested. Civilians typically aren't allowed Surface To Surface missiles, and megawatt power lasers that are effective weapons at a range of over 1000m.

I'll have a 100 ton Madcat 2 soon.

Forcing a dragon to fuck a bear?

Being too homosexual.

FFXIV

MarioKart so hit and run or throwing things at other cars

Driving a Trabant through the desert. Occasionally shooting rabid bunnies.

Space mining.

Calling in a 500kg bomb to kill a few bugs.

Mass murdering animals.

Doing 95mp/h in a semi down the shoulder of a highway in Colorado.

Being an ex yakuza

Democracy (it was helldivers)

Crushing LEGO villains and collecting silver, gold, and purple studs.

climbing a mountain and curing my depression

Going a-víking and dismembering "a few" Englishmen...

Starting a cult and working people to death so that I have infinite money without having to do anything.

Edit: before you ask, no, it's not Rimworld or Cult of the Lamb

Edit 2: I wonder if anyone can guess the game

Loving Managed Democracy too hard

Assisting a vampire in plotting and then carrying out the murder of her father.